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The second half of my KUH-RAZY summer

2009-09-07T20:40:00.000-04:00

So, Saturday, five days after I entered the hospital, I was released; and on Sunday, I flew back home to recover. And, let me tell you! Flying by wheelchair is the ONLY way to go!

Once I got home, I faced 8 weeks of recovery. The first week, I held my stomach like a baby and shuffled around like an old woman. I slept most of the day and popped my pain meds as often as I was allowed. In that time, Gracie came to live with us. She had been kicked out of her home with nothing more than her clothes in trash bags.

After four weeks, I was ready to get the heck out of dodge, so I took the first ride to Charleston... literally. I was visiting my Dad when out of the blue my uncle Steve showed up happening to be on his way to the famed city by the sea. He offered me a ride, and I jumped on it!
The next day, Monday, I woke up in my favorite city in the world with high hopes of starting a new life here. Jobless, homeless, carless... I had nothing more than a bag of clothes and my guitar. But, I was happy and hopeful and surrounded by the best friends a girl could have.

A day turned into a week and nothing happened... Actually, LOTS happened, but roots never sprouted, and a week blossomed into a month, and I was still jobless, carless, and homeless (living at Kimmie’s for the time). I fell more in love with dancing, though, having gone dancing on the pier several times; I spiraled into adoration for kids as I helped Tracy with Owen and Rosie; and I met the man of my dreams. NO REALLY!

It started as a way to kill time, meet some people, and maybe score a few dates... nothing serious, right? The first time I chatted with Chad, it was utterly forgettable. In fact, I didn’t recognize who he was the second time he IMed me. We talked about how he’d never been to Hooters until his roommate took him for his birthday the day before, and I honestly forgot I even talked to him once our conversation was over. But the following Tuesday, the same week I arrived in Charleston, Chad and I spoke on the phone for the first time. We talked a total of 25 hours that week--one session lasting almost ten hours! We just couldn’t get enough of each other! And by Friday’s conversation (which lasted five hours, by the way), Chad told me that he wanted to pursue a more serious relationship with me; he told me he was smitten with me and loved everything about me. Needless to say, I was rather floored by this news, and, while I enjoyed talking to him and looked forward to getting to know him better, I wasn’t at ALL expecting to start a relationship with him! I’d never even MET this cat!! However, if everything he said was true, I could easily fall in love with him. Several times that first week, I wondered if he’d read my journals because he was saying EVERYTHING I wanted to hear... and that freaked me out a bit.

So, how did I react? I pulled back! This guy was talking about a potential lifetime with me, and I was just looking for a good flirt. I told him that I needed some time to think about his proposal (no, not THAT kind of proposal!!). I said that I needed the rest of the weekend to pray and think about all that he had said. He told me to take as long as I needed, and if I needed more time, he’d wait on me. “I’m not going anywhere, Laina. I’m going to be here as long as it takes you to come to a decision. Take your time,” he said... well, that pretty much made my decision for me... I WANTED HIM!! And by noon on Saturday, I had come to my decision, but Tracy made me wait until Sunday night to contact him. So, I did, and the house rule was that NOBODY was allowed to talk about him. TORTURE!!

Sunday night rolled around and I was DYING to talk to Chad, but people came over, so I had to be polite. I gave them until 9, and then I would be occupied. On Saturday, I had drafted a letter to Chad explaining everything and saying that I wanted to meet him face-to-face before I went any further with our relationship. The earliest he could come was two weeks from then, but he would do it. In the interim, we continued to talk and grow closer, but the build up to The Meeting was intense! What if the chemistry just wasn’t there? What if he had annoying mannerisms? What if he liked me but I didn’t like him--or vice versa? So many “what ifs” swirled around my head that I got dizzy. The greatest thing about Chad, though, is that I was comfortable with bringing these issues up with him. So, by the time Friday rolled around, I was nervous with excitement not insecurity.

The last thing I wanted was for mine and Chad’s first meeting to be ordinary. Since he was coming to see ME, though, I took the responsibility to plan our first evening together. I kept it a secret, not even telling him where to meet me until he was just outside Charleston and I texted the address to him!!

It all started at Barnes and Noble. We had talked several times about how much we both loved the bookstore, so I thought it would be an appropriate first meeting place. But, I wasn’t content to just BE there waiting on him... I wanted a little excitement and adventure. So I sent him on a scavenger hunt.

HA! Somethings don't QUITE work out as planned...

2009-06-29T09:03:00.003-04:00

In my last post, I listed the next four steps in my journey. I'm beginning to learn that I shouldn't do that because when God knows my plan, He always changes them.

First off, I never delivered the boat with Keith. Turns out we never even made it out of the New River. One mishap after another (to save Keith's dignity, I won't go into gory details, but I will say that we had to dock at Bahia Mar twice in one morning!!), and I jumped ship before anything else when wrong. After I left, all seemed right with the world. I guess I'm not so lucky for Lucky Dog?

I actually DIDN'T jump ship because of Keith's boat. Actually, I got a phone call from the interim captain off Pastime inviting me to come back and clean up the boat! YESSSS!!! So, I quite literally am a boat hopper, and I'm not ashamed to admit it. The boat was as I left it, but missing the captain and his cranky wife. Missing is too nice of a term. Celebrating the VICTORY of their untimely departure is more like it. I started immediately getting the boat in order and what a JOB it was! I stirred up mold and dust that had been trapped behind drawers and under beds and inside closets for years. Needless to say all the cleaning supplies and swirling allergens didn't help my head one bit and over the course of the week, my body just started to wind down.

But, we never made it to the Abacos. Dave, the captain who agreed to take over while Mr. Boss found a permanent captain, determined the vessel *as nicely as possible* not seaworthy. Turns out the portside engine had overheated and an alarm ignored twelve times. Now the engine needs to be replaced -- how? They aren't sure. May have to have a hole cut into the side of the boat to take the whole thing out in one piece. ALSO, the fuel line was worn down nearly paper thin... and the fuel line runs OVER the transformer that HAD had a fire in it and has to be replaced altogether. SO, it's highly likely the boat could have caught fire in the engine room. BUT the story doesn't end there. The fire detection system hadn't been checked in recent years and the air vents that are supposed to shut the engine room off to oxygen had been propped open with sticks. But WAIT! There's MORE!!! The EPIRB -- a device that sets off a signal telling Coast Guard where liferafts are -- was still registered to the boss's old boat, and the life rafts were only for 10 people when the boat has ALWAYS carried 12. I guess this is another one of those "Prior proper planning..." moments. Can you IMAGINE what would have happened if we'd had an emergency? And, not to freak anyone out, but the ocean around the Bahamas is MILES deep. If something had happened out there, we'd be fish food before anyone would miss us.

But, I got a job aboard the boat playing the role of Cinderella... until Tuesday of last week. AH! the REAL adventure starts here!

Monday all day I had felt "off"... more off than usual. I just wrote it off to being around all the filth and chemicals. We had gotten a new, permanent captain that day, so Iain and I wanted to impress him so we could keep our jobs, and I did my best to stay on my game all day. But, I knew something wasn't right. Monday night when my friend Shannon invited me out for a drink, I really didn't want to go, but I did want to see her, so I agreed to go out for one libation and some chat. Then it HIT me like a round house kick to the gut. I could literally FEEL myself turning a puky green yellow and a sharp pain began to grow in my side. I tried to ignore it. I'd had gas before, and I wasn't going to let this get me down. But it kept growing and by 9:30, I had Shannon drive me home on her scooter. I went to bed and tossed and turned all while watching the clock go from 10 to 10:30 to 11 to 11:30. Finally at midnight, I threw up everything I'd eaten in the last 12 hours. Feeling somewhat better, I washed my face, brushed my teeth, and decided that was that. But, my body had a different plan. Again, I tossed and turned watching the clock from midnight to 12:30 to 1 to 1:30 on up to 4 in the morning. I fell asleep and woke up again and again. Needless to say, once 7:30 rolled around, I felt like a train wreck. From Iain's expression when I emerged, I didn't look much better.

The LAST thing I wanted was for the new captain to think I couldn't be trusted to go out and come back and do my job. The last captain told him horror stories about how I drink and party with the guests until all hours of the night, so of course he'd be inclined to believe the B.S. with evidence seemingly in his face. I tried to paint on a happy face, but the pain in my gut kept growing and I couldn't walk well, my smile was more of a grimace, and I was exhausted. Just giving up, I told the captain what was going on, how I'd only had one drink and I'd gotten sick at midnight. He told me to go back to bed until I felt better and come on back to work. I slept until 2 pm. The pain kept growing, despite my taking Gas-X. By that time, the captain decided to take me to the hospital. "Oh, GOD! I thought, this better be more serious than GAS!!! Otherwise, I'll never keep my job on this boat!" Well, it was. Lots.

After a blood test and CAT scan, the ER docs decided that I DID in fact have appendicitis and that my right ovary had a huge tumor on it. The doctor said huge, not I. He said the tumor was 7"x6"x5"... basically I had a coconut growing in my abdomen. Speaking with an OB, I discovered that they couldn't do the appendectomy laparoscopically because the ovary was in the way. They'd have to create an incision which meant that they might as well go in ONCE and get it all done. Multiple surgeries would put me at higher risk for infection. So I relented and consented to having everything taken out at once, so long as I could fly home once I was released from the hospital.

And so my SECOND adventure in a hospital begins... but that is another post... and believe me, it's QUITE a post. I even made NOTES for it!! But suffice to say, I survived that hell-spital and am back at home in Georgia allowing my family to take care of me. At the moment, my mom and step-dad are working, my sister's at school, and my brother is still asleep... Needless to say, they won't be getting THEIR Christmas bonuses from me! But the pups... if they could fix me drinks and daub my brow with rose-scented water and sing sweet songs if healing to me (not that my family would do those things either), they would. I just know it. But, their greatest gift is to lay beside me and give me their warmth. That's really all I need.

Update... and my agenda for the next few weeks...

2009-06-15T13:13:00.002-04:00

Alrighty... SO, the Atlanta American Idol plan crumbled like sand through my fingertips yesterday. Turns out I didn't have enough money in my debit for the car rental company to charge to my account... It was getting to stressful anyway. SO, here is my tentative agenda for the next few weeks...

1. Help Keith deliver Lucky Dog to Key West tomorrow... return June 18th or 19th.
2. Prep Pastime for a trip to the Abacos... and go on the trip! Return on July 3rd.
3. Rent a car and go to Key West for July 4th to perform at a dock party for almost ALL of Nascar drivers... PAID GIG!!!
4. Take the train to Orlando for the American Idol auditions on July 7-9...

I was really hoping to hear back from a 130' Westport who needed a Stew/Deck... the captain told me he'd contact me by Monday, but I've heard nothing... I worked for them on Thursday, and honestly, if he'd wanted to hire me, he'd have contacted me by now. Whatever. It just stinks because I *of course* made friends with people on the boat -- especially the deckhand, Max, who also plays guitar. Oh well. Maybe we'll run into each other if I can ever get to New England this summer.

I'm starting to get nervous about this trip on Pastime. I've been keeping contact with the chef, Iain, and he's telling me that I'm onboard for the trip... but, I don't know if I'm hired for temporary or permanent. Plus, I don't know when they are expecting me to move on board. There is definitely enough to keep me occupied until we leave June 24th... and I'd rather be working on Pastime than delivering the boat to Key West... I'd be making money at least!!

Anyway, Keith just handed me a salon gift card for $25! Is my HORRIBLE hair that obvious?! I haven't had a trim since September... trim or color, that is. HA! In desperate need for a fix-up, ya think?

American Idol Auditions...

2009-06-13T21:56:00.002-04:00

Alright, boys and girls... it's that time again, and it just so happens that your favorite gypsy has decided to try her hand at making Simon smile... I found out tonight that American Idol is hosting auditions in Atlanta on June 16, 17, and 18. SO, I've decided that WHAT THE HELL!!! I'm gonna GO FOR IT!!! EEEEEK! I'm renting a car tomorrow and driving up to my old stomping grounds... I'm SOOO NERVOUS!

2.5 weeks... unleashed.

2009-06-07T15:33:00.000-04:00

Wednesday, May 20

Okay, so I’m back in the Bahamas for round 2 of cruising on Pastime. We left Lauderdale around 10:00 Tuesday morning -- after staying up until the wee hours fixing a water leak in the salon. It had been raining for hours and water was leaking out every available hole for about 8 feet over the main salon sofa. By the time we found the leak (or shall I say FLOOD?), one section of the sofa was drenched. At the moment, I have damp rid sachets on top of the worst parts hoping that they will suck out the remaining water before guest arrival on Saturday... It doesn’t help at ALL that the air is already super humid and we’ve been cruising through rainstorms for two days. Oh well...

Iain, the chef, and I couldn’t WAIT to see the crank off the boat. And honestly, our trip has been a BLAST without her. This morning, the captain woke us up with Lynyrd Skynyrd playing in the pilot house, and we rocked out to “Free Bird” as we drove into yet ANOTHER squall. No dramas, no arguments... just laughing and having a good time... if she had been on board, I’d been crammed up her butt the whole time with her ordering me around or talking at me like I was five. FOR ONCE, I’m being taken seriously and treated like a viable crew member!

However, seasickness is threatening to rear its ugly head for me... The past two days I’ve had to go down to my bed to try to sleep off the queasiness and today I thought I was going to lose it. Of course, I haven’t been taking my ginger pills... You know what? I think I’m going to go ahead and make some ginger tea to have for tomorrow... this weather doesn’t show ANY promise of improving, and if I DO have something inner ear going on, then I’ll need all the preventive measures I can take. SO, no drinking tonight, ginger tea and dry toast in the morning.

OH! I got to take the helm a few times today! The captain told me what all the buttons meant, and if I did have any emergencies that I can slow down by pulling back on the throttle. Of course Iain showed up fifteen minutes later, but I got to be captain for a WHOLE FIFTEEN MINUTES!

My line handling skills are improving. Honestly, I was nervous without the crank on board to talk me through everything, and I’m REALLY glad that we have a few days of docking before the guests get on board. Now I’ve gotten some practice. I just pray that the currents behave themselves so we don’t have any mishaps like we almost did last time. THAT could be a problem. But, if we do have anything crazy happen, we’ll handle it with calm and poise.

Okay... tea has been made and is steeping in a plastic jug. I’ve got plenty for the ride tomorrow. It’ll be weaker than usual, but I’ll leave the bags in the water. GOTTA KEEP MY STOMACH!! The last thing I need is for Iain to start teasing me about how Americans have weak stomachs.

Anyway, I’m going to grab my guitar and head outside to thaw out. We got a new air conditioner that I honestly think is a refrigeration system because we’ve had to turn half the units off and are STILL walking around in sweats. Poor Iain, who is accustomed to sweltering Cayman Islands, refuses to take his jacket off! Silly Brit.

More later, I suppose... If you’re good boys and girls.

Thursday, May 21

WHAT A DAY! We left Nassau around 9-ish this morning. I am really pleased with how docking has been going (knock on wood).... I pray that things continue to go smoothly through the entire trip!

The ride today was slow going with rain pouring down and reefs popping up all over the place. At one point, Iain had to go out to the bow and point out the rocks and coral that weren’t coming up on the charts (books, handheld GPS, and the yacht’s on-board navigation system). Poor guy came in soaked to the bone and freezing. Of course it’s 85 degrees outside, but 65 inside. I finally got so tired of being frozen that I just went around turning all the units off. The captain just follows me around turning them back on, but at least I get a temporary relief.

We anchored out off some privately owned island. Yachts and fishing boats are all anchored out here -- about fifteen to twenty in all. Dying to get into the water, I donned my bathing suit after dinner and took a dip. AHH! REFRESHMENT! The water was fairly shallow (about 12 feet deep) and crystal clear. Iain loaned me his mask and snorkel but there wasn’t much to look at, just grass and sand and a beer bottle. Not even any fish! But I still had some fun splashing around... and the boys had fun teasing me about how there were sharks around.

My favorite part about anchoring out is sitting on the swim platform and watching the underwater lights that illuminate about about 20-25 yards around the stern of the boat. I love the silence and peacefulness of anchoring out. Even though there are other boats around, the water is still and nobody else is nearby. It’s so romantic and dangerous at the same time. I love it! So, tonight, I was having a peaceful moment just fascinated by the inch-long neon fish swarming around the lights, but growing tired. I was just turning around to go inside when I saw a dark brown figure come creeping out of the starboard shadows. Lo and behold! It was a SHARK!! Adrenaline shot through me. The water is so clear that it looked like it was floating on the surface, even though I know that it was swimming around 10 feet below. My eyes must have been huge as the creature glided across the light beam. Once it left, I waited eagerly hoping that it would come back. I even considered (for a split second) splashing my toe in the water to spark its curiosity. But I didn’t.

Friday night, May 22

I don’t know what I was expecting, but it wasn’t this. We are docked in Georgetown, the capital of the Exuma islands in the Bahamas. There are about ten other boats here and the buildings remind me of Africa. NO REALLY! The roads are roughly paved with sidewalks as an afterthought. The people wear what they have with some styles older than me, and everything is simple and scaled down. It’s quite comforting, I must say. I could see myself settling in a place like this where everyone knows each other and time is just another four-letter word.

The only thing that irks me is that I can’t get the internet here, and I’ve been offline for days. I wouldn’t worry so much about it if I didn’t NEED a job and depend upon my phone and internet connections to get me one! The Captain has been gracious to let me use his iPhone to access my email and voicemail, but I can’t respond properly because I don’t have access to my files on my computer! ARGH! But, the right job will come along I just have to have faith.

So, the captain has created an itinerary for our seven-day trip. We’ll be cruising most of the time, but I think we’ll be stopping to take in some of the local wildlife. No really. Apparently there is a place where sharks hang out and you can feed and swim with them? I’m not SURE about it, but I have a feeling Iain will bully me into going. Of course, it is kinna exhilarating to think I would be with in biting distance of a hundreds of jagged teeth -- whether they are interested in a taste or not. Of course, why would you want to FEED AND SWIM with sharks? I would think you’d want to feed them first, get them full and wait a half an hour before dipping the tosies in... Otherwise they might think you’re an odd tasting desert. I’m sure I’ll figure it all out once the big day arrives. And who knows? I may not even be able to go along on the excursion. Seven guests is a LOT to take care of alone -- with laundry, beds to make, heads to clean, drinks to serve... Once the guests get off board, that’s my chance to catch up on polishing the marble and brass, vacuuming, ironing, and whatever else I can get to without being interrupted.

Whatever I end up doing on this trip, I do hope I lose another five pounds. Of course, that’ll never happen if I don’t stop EATING! I can’t seem to stay full the past few days, and I’m driving Iain nuts with my “I’m hungry”’s. Every time he turns around, I’m sneaking another handful of saltines... I can’t help it! I’m famished! Maybe once the guests arrive, I’ll be so busy that I won’t have time to THINK about food. That’s the way it worked out the last trip.

Oh who knows... I just want to check my email.

Sunday, May 24th

The guests boarded yesterday afternoon, and it’s been a blast ever since. I really enjoy these people -- especially the boss’s wife. She’s so down to earth and easygoing. The boss is a bit over the top at times, but now that I understand that about him, we get along great.

They took us out to lunch today at the Staniel Cay Yacht Club which sounds fancy smancy, but it was really more of a divey bar with name plates from ships that had sunk in the area and flags from yacht clubs all over the world. There was a pool table and a real tiki bar! Lunch was slow but good... and all the while I kept thinking about things I needed to do on the boat--laundry needs to be turned over, gotta get those hats out from under the master bed, what am I going to do about the black lint on our new white towels?--A stew’s job is NEVER done.

Had a fantastic conversation with the boss’s wife today. I was turning over laundry and she was getting “put back together” after her shower. We talked about God and how to know His will and how to tell the difference between difficulties that prepare you for more of God’s will or difficulties that mean you’re NOT in His will. I could tell she wanted to talk more about it, and I do too. It’s so nice to have someone to talk about spiritual things with... Aside from my friends in Charleston and family, I don’t have many other people to get gritty with. I’m still testing the water with Mrs. Boss, but she’s “real people”, so I’m pretty sure she’s safe.

Tomorrow night we are having a mystery dinner party on board! I’m SOOO excited to be able to do this! One of the guests brought it, and I’m ecstatic that everyone is keen on participating! Even the captain and Iain want in on it! HAHA! I get to play the role of the diva movie star. Of course, none of us have proper evening attire, but I think that will make it all the more fun! I have my own idea of what I’d like to wear. I’ll need borrow some things from the boss and another guest, but I think they’ll let me. If not, then I’ll just have to improvise. I’m SURE there will be many pictures...

OH! We can’t seem to get away from the sharks! When we pulled in today, there were about five nurse sharks RIGHT under our boat! There are also rays all over and gorgeous striped fish. The boys are out there right now illegally fishing off the dock... You’re only in trouble if you get caught, right?

The boss and his wife mentioned their son again. It’s funny. The boss was saying how I needed to go along on their next tender excursion -- for “protection” he said. At that, I did my kung fu pose, and Mrs. said, “Aw! Wouldn’t she be so cute with [our son]?” I still have yet to find out ANYTHING about their son. Except that he just graduated from college last week, and apparently he does something with film editing. I’m sure he’s wildly successful just like his father... or will be at least.

Mr.’s brother is on board, too, and HE has allegedly recorded a Christian rock album. Been talking about it the entire trip and has (after IAIN BLABBED and said I play guitar!!) said I have to listen to it. No worries, but I’m just waiting for Iain to *casually mention* that I also sing and for them to request a concert. Of COURSE, I brought my guitar and I would love to play for them, but it’s always a little nerve wracking... you know?

I swear, I could go on and on... but suffice to say that I’m exhausted but happy. There are a few things I’d like to change, but I’m only temporary here... As much as it stinks, that’s the way it is.

May 25, 2009

Good LORD, I’m tired! It’s not even 10 yet, and I feel like I’ve been going for 20 hours... Let’s see, I was wide awake at 5, so... hmmm... 17 hours is pretty darn close. This morning started out great (even though I hate waking up too early). Instead of trying to fight my body and go back to sleep -- which would just leave me ticked off because I’d be MORE tired in the end -- I got up, and Jolene and I had a nice little jam session on the aft deck. We watched the dawn turn to day and started off with a song in my heart. AH! Of course, it was slam-packed from there... beds to make, laundry to turn over, breakfast to serve, linens to iron, dishes to put away, drinks to fix... the list goes on, but that’s a start.

After lunch, we took off to Big Major Cay, home of wild pigs! The welcoming committee met us on the beach but waited patiently for their treats (our leftovers from the day before). They were SO CUTE! I got some cute pictures of this one pig who seemed infatuated with my camera. I wished I had put my bathing suit on because the water was SO warm and the sand was soft like powder. I could have stayed out there for hours -- lobster burn or no. I have to admit, though, I had a minor melt down with the captain and Iain. Just as Mr. Boss was leaving with the first tender-full of guests, he yelled from the boat to whip up a cooler with Caesars, ice, a few beers, and some water. As I ran around getting all this together -- might I mention that I had to dig the cooler out from under a guests bed? -- the two other guests, the captain, and Iain were getting ready for the field trip. As soon as the tender returned, they wanted me to board and be ready. I SO WASN’T! I needed sunscreen, my sunglasses, my camera, flip flops, my bathing suit would have been nice. They kept telling me to hurry, and Iain even came in and said they were waiting on me. I just snapped back to go on without me if they couldn’t wait another minute. Of course, with all the hustle, I forgot the bottle opener, and Mr. Boss had to make a big deal out of it. And nobody even said thank you.

Once we returned from feeding the wild pigs, the guests all went snorkeling. This gave me a chance to sit down and breathe for a second... but not long because they were back within 45 minutes. Oh yeah, did I mention I also was setting up for dinner? Which moved from the aft deck to the fly bridge but ended up moving to the salon because of an attack of flies.

Anyway... I’m whooped. How many days left? 5... sheesh... gotta get my rest.

Tuesday, May 26, 2009

Emotional roller coaster today. Woke up sore but refreshed... Doing my thing--setting up for breakfast, chatting with the guests, turning over laundry, putting away dishes from the night before--when (and I hate to seem so sensitive, but things like this have been building up to my reaction) the captain sits down for breakfast and tells me to get out the butter and syrup for his pancake. The syrup bottle had sticky drips all over it, so I was cleaning it off when the captain says, “Can I have some syrup, Laina?” I gave him an “eat shit” look and slammed it on the table saying, “I was trying to clean it off for you.” Patronizingly he replies, “I know...” Well, if you KNEW, then why were you demanding it? YOU SAW I WAS WORKING ON IT! Asshole...

Anyway, as I was fixing beds and heads, Mrs. Boss popped her head in and said that I was doing a great job and she was jealous of whoever “gets me” because she doesn’t want me to leave! HOW SWEET! Truth be told, I don’t want to leave them either! We had SOOO much fun last night after dinner. Mrs. loves the Mama Mia! soundtrack, and on the last trip, she and all the guests made me dance with them. SO, last night, they put it on again, and we had a little dance party in the main salon. It was HYSTERICAL! Of course, the boss’s brother got the whole thing on film and has *promised* us it would be on Youtube next week. Ooooh Lord. But really, we were just having a good time. I wasn’t doing anything I wouldn’t do any other time, and I think that’s what the boss likes about me. I’m not pretentious or snooty. I stay away when it’s time to, I get my work done, and I still manage to have a good time doing it. Of course, I don’t hang around when nobody is talking to me, and I keep my conversations short. I don’t want to be a bother to them. AND BESIDES! Mrs. Boss wants me to meet her youngest son! She’s mentioned it several times on this trip, and the more I get to know them, the more I want to meet him! But, I know virtually nothing about him... except that he just graduated from college as a film major. And he worked on some movie... and that’s about it. Oh, and he’s 6’2”... haven’t seen a picture or heard anything else.

Wednesday, May 27

Swam with sharks this morning! WAHOO! Actually, I splashed around while they all napped at the bottom of the water. Oh well, I dove down to them and petted some, too. They feel like sandpaper, but there is something strangely inviting about them. Last night, when we were on the dock, we petted more and I think Mrs. Boss and I put one to sleep because he was resting up on the dock and even when we moved away, he was so still and limp looking!

Last night, we also had our mystery dinner party. Everyone did a great job, and we even got a few group shots of everyone in their “party attire”... I borrowed a huge floppy hat from one guest and a pink ascot from Mr. Boss. I looked fabulous, dahling.

My loathing for the captain grows by the day... he’s just gross. And, even though I’ve been invited back for another trip (Mrs. Boss has already said she’s trying to figure out a way to keep me around for good), I’m not sure if I can handle the captain... and if the crank comes along too, UGH! It would be a MISERABLE trip with her yammering on and on non stop about EVERYTHING... and treating me like I’m an idiot. I think Keith would probably LOVE this family, and they would most likely like him... he just has to knock off the fake ass kissing trill in his voice. Then again, Iain has also said that he and I could run the boat no problem. I don’t know about THAT, but...

Thursday, May 28

Okay, so there’s talk of another week of this. The current guests get off in Nassau on Saturday, and last night we found out that another couple may come on board on Sunday and be off again... WHAT a turnover! Because Mr. and Mrs. Boss are still going to be on board so we still have to take care of them, clean the rooms, provision, and make everything perfect for the new arrivals. GREEEAAAAT. Of course, it’s just talk now, but that means I’ll still be sleeping on the crew mess floor for another week... ugh.

It’s kindof starting to bother me that the boss is so open about his Christianity but still doesn’t have consideration for the crew who is working 16 hour days to take care of him. If I were an owner, I would give my crew members one day a week off -- whether I was aboard or not. We would dock at a marina and they would not have to do ANY work -- so no heads and beds, dusting, ironing, setting up for dinner... whatever. I think this would give the crew a TREMENDOUS morale boost while also letting the guests know what crew really does for them. We make it seem so easy, but it’s not... I’m all OVER that damn boat all the time... I work very hard for my money... in FACT, today the guests have all gone ashore for lunch. What did the boys do? Retreat to their cabins for naps. My bed, of course, is neatly packed away so the captain can get to the engine room. While they have been snoozing, I’ve vacuumed the boat, swept the back deck, and set out the cushions out to dry in the sun. I also need to iron and turn over laundry, but we’re working with limited water here on the hook, so I’m only washing the necessities.

At any rate, on charters this long, crew needs some down time. With a larger crew, it wouldn’t be so hard because other crew members could fill in and give each other some time to unwind. MY time to unwind is after 10:30 when everyone else has gone to bed. I can’t get my guitar out and play because I can’t let the guests see that side of me... I’m paid to work, not sit around singing and strumming my guitar. How can I unwind when I’m collapsing into bed every night?

Granted, their leaving for hours at at time is nice, but I am still expected to have the boat clean, laundry done, meals set up... everything must be ship-shape, and I could feasibly work at SOMETHING at all times... For the first few days of the trip, I did that and ran myself into the ground almost immediately. Of course, I don’t want to be seen as lazy or dropping the ball on anything. I’m only temporary, but the bosses love me, and I want to keep it that way. BUT, I’ve got to pace myself, and sometimes Mr. Boss wants everything done NOW. He asked me about that earlier in the week, and I said that, yes, this job is a lot of work, but if I pace myself, everything gets done... It may not all get done at once, but everything is taken care of. Basically, for me to keep up with everything, I have to keep working. Even writing this is causing me to get behind, but I need some therapy. Good grief, I could SO take a nap right now (and it’s only 11)... but I REALLY need to iron.

Sunday, May 31

So, new guests have boarded for another week of Bahamian madness... Mr. and Mrs. Boss’s pastor and his wife and their single, twenty-something son. We all went out to dinner last night and had a great time. I have a feeling that this is going to be another great week. The son is sweet and cute in a nerdy sort of way. He’s tall and skinny and had a constant five o’clock shadow... I’ve always thought scruff was hot. Of course, Iain teases me mercilessly about him... I swear, Iain and I have turned into quite the duo. He’s such a kidder and we are constantly messing up each other’s stuff. Today he knocked my towel rolls out of the basket and kicked them all over the salon... I poured out the water his bamboo skewers were soaking in. He and I were calling each other names and making faces and he threw a chocolate and hit me in the eye... I popped him with the towel. Yes, we’re flirting, but I think its because we know that nothing will happen. He’s got a great girlfriend back home, and I’ve already practically been betrothed to Mr. Boss’s son.

Mr. Son... I kept catching him staring at me last night. Of course, I’d hold his gaze and smile for a moment, and look away... but it both thrilled me and weirded me out--

(Okay, I just got back from the galley making margaritas for Mr. Son... He’s SO cute! I admit. I’m getting smitten with him... I wonder what he thinks about me? He probably thinks I’m funny, a bit kooky, maybe too loud. Of course, what’s going to happen at the end of this week? He’s going back to St. Louis (or wherever he lives) and I’m going back to the unemployment line... I can enjoy it while it lasts, but I’m not going to bank on anything more than a week of fluttering stomachs. But, honestly, I’m not nervous around him... even though I know we are both well aware of EVERYONE staring at us every time we talk or laugh at something. And I hope I’m not being any different than I usually am.)

--it’s always kinna cool to be looked at and to have that intruding awareness that someone is checking you out... I know I looked good last night--I always do when I have my make-up on. But honestly, I’ve noticed that I’ve been looking better in general lately. I think I’m slimming down (Mrs. Boss even said that every time she looks at me, I seem to be melting away.) and i’ve got a tan... I FEEL prettier, even though I’m seldom wearing anything that isn’t khaki or logo-ed “Pastime”... and for the first time in a LONG time, I’m happy with my work. Yes, it’s exhausting, but I enjoy serving these people because they are good people.

Anyway, we are headed back to Staniel Cay -- home of the cool tiki bar where we had lunch and I wished we could have played pool... maybe we can this time! I think we are definitely going back to Thunderball Cave. I didn’t get to see it last time, so that’ll be cool. It’s going to be interesting to see what sort of trouble we are going to get into this week. Iain and I have already decided that at some point, we are going to jump off the fly bridge and into the water... but only if it’s pretty deep. That’ll make a cool picture! Of course, we only get one shot. Otherwise we’d have to walk soaking wet through the salon and up into the pilothouse to get to the fly bridge.

I had the good fortune to go to the spa at Atlantis yesterday, and the lady waxing my eyebrows was SO wonderful. I was telling her about how I was going to meet the boss’s son that evening, and how I wasn’t ready for a relationship and that I’d just had my heart broken pretty badly. The way she talked, I am sure she is a believer, and she was such an encouragement. She told me that everything that has led me to this point is for a reason, and each moment is a miracle and has a purpose. Whether this meeting goes well or not -- ends up in love, friendship, or just a week of fun -- it is all part of the journey. There is nothing to worry about or fret over. Just be who I am and let the chips fall where they may. And she told me that I need to believe that I will find someone who will love me forever. “See what you believe, don’t believe what you see,” she said. It sounds like quite a paradox, but for some reason it makes sense. We are going back to Atlantis at the end of the week, and I’d love to find her and tell her how the week went. Her name was Suzanne, I think.

Later on this evening...

Okay, so I’m SURE there is some interest on Mr. Son’s part... he made bananas foster for everyone tonight, and I suppose there wasn’t enough to fix me a bowl after everyone had had their share (I was doing turndowns while they made the good stuff!), so he shared with me. How SWEET! And then, tonight I was requested to play guitar for everyone in the salon (where Mr. Boss dominated and I think ticked everyone off), and he never left the couch or took his eyes off me. And, honestly, I don’t mind it. But, I do have to admit, I chatted with Mrs. Boss about him (we were at the bar, thus slightly intoxicated and not crew/owner but equals), and I said that I could see what she meant about how similar our personalities are. We get each other’s jokes!! And I told her about the lady at the spa, and she told me that Mr. Son hadn’t dated anyone for a long time because he himself had been in some bad relationships and wasn’t interested in that anymore. And she told me that he would just love to get to know me -- talk to me and just have fun together. No problem. I’d like that, too.

Thursday, June 4th

The trip has been going VERY well... every evening, Iain, Mr. Son, and I get to leave the boat and hang out, and I’m looking forward to it every night. We’ve been snorkeling at Thunderball Cave -- wish I had pictures of it!! It was AMAZING. TONS of fish and gorgeous coral and plant life. This is just more incentive for me to get OUT of debt and purchase a good underwater camera... I’m missing out on SO much!

Anyway, the boss took all of us out to dinner last night at this really beautiful place on Fowl Cay. Part of the way through, I started feeling really queasy, and in the middle of talking to Mr. Boss about my name and heritage, I had to leave the table and ended up puking in the bathroom. After that, I started feeling much better, but within 15 minutes, the stabbing pain was back in my stomach and Iain offered to tender me back to the boat. Thank God, because I got sick again less than 30 minutes after making it back... and the rest of the night, I tossed and turned with a sore stomach that seemed ready to blow at any moment. No more puking, though, but I did wake up this morning feeling like I’d been in a wrestling match all night... my entire body ached. The captain told me to go back to bed and he’d wake me when we docked at Compass Cay. By the time I woke up again, we were docked and everyone had had lunch. Iain told me that every one was freaking out and spraying lysol everywhere, sanitizing every surface they could get their hands on. He told me to stay out of the galley because if they caught me in there, they might make him throw out the food! So, I’m the boat pariah today... trying to emerge from my leper’s cave to get a few things done -- turn over laundry, and tidy up a bit... Mrs. Boss has been a sweetheart, just wanting me to feel better and take it easy today. So, here I am... quarantined to my cabin... at least I get internet here, and there are a few movies on board to watch...

As for Mr. Son, I’m really enjoying getting to know him. Sometimes it feels like everything we do is being watched, so it’s nice to go off the boat for a while and not be “guest/crew” for a few hours. He and I definitely have the same sense of humor, so it’s fun to joke around with him... But, again, the trip is ending in less than two days... what then?

Saturday, June 6

Okay, so the guests have LEFT THE BOAT!!!! We are currently at the fuel dock taking on some diesel so we can actually make it home... It was a fun trip, but I was glad to see them go. I hope they call me back for another trip... maybe.

Last night, the boys and I met up with Iain’s mate Nick. We had a few rounds of cocktails at the casino bar and moved on to the night club. We had a good time, but the boys really hurt my feelings with how they went after other girls as though I was chopped liver. And the other girls weren’t even CUTE! What is that about?! I guess I AM chopped liver... I mean because clearly the girl they were with isn’t interesting enough to hang out with. Assholes.

Anyway, the boss’ son was asked to leave--not really sure why because he seemed to be fine to us (unless he was doing something we didn’t know about)--so we all took that as our cue to go too. I was actually ready to leave at that point... Mr. Son and I had a few rounds on the dance floor, I’d drank more than I EVER wanted to, and it was already 2 am and I had to be on deck at 7.

Once we made it back to the boat, Mr. Son, the night owl, insisted that I watch Natural Born Killers with him. In an attempt to keep the noise level down (he loves his movies LOUD!), I suggested we watch it on my computer in my cabin... that way if I did fall asleep, I wouldn’t have to move! (P.S. The movie was R-rated, but our behavior was completely family friendly... Rated G ALL THE WAY!) At first, I couldn’t tell if I was delirious because of alcohol or exhaustion, but about 15 minutes into the movie, I realized I would have felt the same if I was completely sober and wide-awake. THAT FILM IS WEIRD!!!! I only made it about 20 minutes into the acid-trip blood spilling spree before I nodded off and Mr. Son popped up and said he was about to fall asleep so he was off to bed... mmmm... okay. G’night.

Anyway, the captain and I are taking the boat back alone--18 hours of nuthin’ but him... UGH. Hopefully once we get underway, I’ll go down for a sleep and relieve him once we get into the open water. The forecast is supposed to be pretty smooth -- 2-3 foot seas, SE wind at 10-15 knots... I have about 20 loads of laundry to do... and I can possibly get some cleaning done. But, if I drag this out two more days, I’ll have more money... longer than two days, and it’s my own time. Hehehe... This captain has tried to swindle me out of money before, so I don’t trust him. He’s probably going to expect me to work like a dog on the crossing AND keep watch while he just sits on his fat arse on watch and sleeps on his time off. No way, Jose... A crossing is a crossing... you take it easy because energy is spent on watch. I don’t mind getting a head start, but don’t expect me to do three days of work just so you can save a few hundred dollars.

AAAAAAND WE’RE OFF! I am not really looking forward to going back to Lauderdale... mainly because I am essentially unemployed again, I have to go back to a crew house because I am not able to stay with the captain and the crank anymore... oh well. Won’t really miss them anyway. BUT, there are some good things going my way. I’ll have money for a while. Of course, I’ll be a miser until I can score more work -- which, by the way, the hiring frenzy is now over, so who KNOWS what will happen at this point... Maybe this is to my advantage because much of the competition has been hired? Also, I KNOW I lost some more weight on this trip because I need another notch made in my belt. YES! Granted, I’m not a size 0 quite yet, but maybe in a few hundred years I’ll make it.

The thing is I CAN NOT allow myself to become depressed. I have to keep busy and away from bars... walk to Smallwoods and the beach every day if I have to. Maybe I’ll nick a beach towel from the boat and have something decent to sit on at the beach... Maybe I’ll take to carrying my guitar around and pick up a few bucks busking. OR MAYBE JUST MAYBE I’ll have a job waiting on me when I get home. Yes, that’s what I’m going to believe. I have a job waiting on me. OR EVEN BETTER, Blue Moon has realized the error of their ways and they want to hire me. THAT would be freaking amazing. But first, I must update my CV to have it ready for my new employer! Ciao!

LATER...
It’s ten after 8, and I’ve been on watch for two hours... Yes, the captain trusted ME at the helm for two whole hours! WAHOO! Where shall we go? Italy? Alaska? Ha... how about home? That sounds good... We’re about 12 miles away from the nearest land and there’s no boats around... I’m jamming out on my iPod, keeping an eye on the radar, GPS, speed, engine temperature... but it’s much less complicated than it sounds. Besides, the captain comes to check on me every 45 minutes or so. I think he’s fallen asleep now, but he better not get too comfortable because my watch ends at nine, and my pillows are callin’ my name again! Still, this is SUCH great experience for me... The next thing I want to learn is how to drive the tender. TONS of boats want stews who can drive tenders or their tow-behind intrepids or whatever... And THEN, I want to become PADI certified. The more I know, the more marketable I am.

Anyway, I don’t know... I’m excited/nervous about going back to Lauderdale. I SO want a job... one with Christians who LIVE what they believe... and one in or around or based out of Charleston so I can be with my peeps back there... I miss them so much. Camp starts tomorrow. I hate that I’ll have to miss it. BUT, I am currently chained to the world and I have to work... but, God willing, I’ll get OUT of debt and be banking money by fall. I believe it. Mrs. Boss and I never finished our conversation about knowing the difference between trials that prepare and trials that warn... It’s something to think about, but I would have loved to get her opinion on the matter. I’ll probably be writing about it again...

Mr. Son... hmmm... now there’s a mystery. He’s back in St. Louis and probably hanging out with his friends with this past week the furthest thing from his memory. He’s a conundrum... and now that we are a thousand miles apart, I feel I can bare my soul a little more. At first he was sweet and charming (bringing me water and checking on me when I was sick)... then he turned flirty (commenting on my “cute” pink shorts when I was sick, telling me he wanted to hang out with me at the karaoke bar...)... and then last night at the club, he... well, he was a lot of the same. He danced with me and we laughed and had a blast and yet he still randomly hit on ugly gross girls. WTF? Men truly are from Mars, I suppose... I really need to re-read that book. Stupid boys. Of course, what was I expecting? He’s just graduated from college (what took so long?), he’s still in that party-boy mode, and sweet girls like me are just another chick to have fun with. He was never inappropriate or crude, and we did have some laughs... SO, if I made a new friend and nothing more, cool. He’s in the film industry, you know. Hehehe.

Okay, so my 6-9 pm watch is coming to a close, and I’ll have a three-hour break before I have to be back at midnight til 3 am... FUN FUN! I suppose I’ll be chugging the coffee... well, not too much because I have to get some sleep come 3 am! Because I’m back on at 6... and our ETA in Lauderdale is between 8-9 am.

The captain has said I can take Sunday off to rest, find a place to live, and go to customs... I need to get a boater’s option card which will allow me to check into U.S. customs via phone call... And then Monday and Tuesday I can finish boat recovery.

Okay, the sun has completely set, and all the windows are completely BLACK... It’s a good thing we have radars because I’m floatin’ blind. Radar says nobody’s out there... groovy.

2:20 am... Same day... well, sort of.

On watch again, and at this point, it’s a battle of wills... which will I give in to? What my body wants or what my mind HAS to do? At the moment, I’m sitting in a dark pilot house (except for dim lights from navigational equipment) gliding over a gently rocking ocean... I’m in this for another two hours at least, so I need to be marginally comfortable without snuggly comfy. SO, I am drinking a diet coke, my feet are cold, and I’m rocking out to Boston on my iPod. Oh, and eating sorbet leftover from the trip. And as much as I would love a pillow to lean against, I’m resisting the urge to grab one out of the salon. Writing is helping so, prepare yourself for a long entry. (By the way, all the blogs I’ve written of the trip thus far add up to 13 pages. If you read all the way down to this entry, I love you! You REALLY are a trooper!

The captain was 45 minutes late for his last watch, so that made me due back at 12:45. For some reason my alarm didn’t go off, but he woke me up at 1 am anyway. He didn’t go down until 1:30... so my question is when would my watch begin? When I came up or when he went down? He stayed up to radio another vessel about passing on their left rather than their right... Not really necessary, I think, since I could have passed them myself. Whatever. I guess I’ll go back down when he relieves me.

He just popped up to check on me. Nothing to report except that all of a sudden we have a bit of traffic around us. By around us, I mean three boats in a 6 mile radius. Not exactly going to collide with them any time soon.

Um... okay... So I don’t know what to write about now... But I’m awake, so that’s all that really matters. Anyway, I’m sure whatever comes out of my hazy brain wouldn’t make sense anyway. I wish I could write songs. I’m listening to Joe Purdy right now, and I LOVE his music... unfortunately my lyrics are rather stupid. Oh well.

My Long-Over Due Update... Or, Sorry Guys...

2009-05-16T05:16:00.003-04:00

Okay, so some of this is a bit repetitive, but just to give you a recap, here is what's been going on with me the past month... Actually, it's EXACTLY a month to the day. Strange.

Once I found out that all was well on the medical front -- nothing going on with my kidneys or bladder -- I started looking more seriously for a job. Lo and behold, I got a call from a HUGE boat -- 198' -- in Savannah interviewing for a Stew/Cook. Well, they invited me to work with them as they prepped for a trip to Miami. I came aboard and fell in LOVE with the boat--the crew was great, the program pretty good, and the pay was AWESOME! We made it to Miami, they dropped me off, and I haven't heard from them again... What did I do wrong? My sources say nothing. I am simply "not what they were looking for"... well, what is that? Barbie? i am tempted to say yes.

SO, with nothing else to do, I moved into a crew house in Fort Lauderdale -- the LAST place on EARTH I wanted to be. To me, crew houses mean failure, starting from scratch, and trying to claw my way onto a boat. Not my idea of a good time. BUT, I did get into a decent and quiet house fairly far from the 17th street chaos, so that was nice. After being in the house for less than a week, I got a call from a captain and his wife needing a relief stew for a charter going to the Bahamas. I went for the interview, wasn't super thrilled about the job, but happy that it was money and experience and another potential reference. I took it, agreeing to start a few days before the boat left for the islands to help prep.

WHAT a TRIP that turned out to be!!! The chief stew I was working with had a broken fifth metatarsal and she made sure EVERYONE knew it! She lugged around a clunky walking cast that gave her the gait of a madwoman on a rampage (especially when we were underway and the boat rocked and rolled!). She's also hyper as a cracked out chihuahua, so there was NO keeping this girl down. She barked out orders and kept me running from dawn til well after dusk, and after a few days of the madness, I wasn't sure if I could take it much longer. Thankfully, the chef, a personal friend of the owners, is a closet comedian, and he kept me in STITCHES the entire trip making fun of her the entire time! Half the time, I couldn't catch my breath because he was so funny!

BUT, despite The Chief's drama, the trip was fantastic! I learned SO much about running lines and fenders, and I more comfortable with deckwork now than I was before. Of course, it didn't come without it's OWN stresses. The first few times we docked I ROYALLY screwed up my lines, and once when we were docking in Port Lucaya, we almost HIT another yacht! Thank GOD we had fenders between us!

In addition, the owners fell in LOVE with me... of course, what's NOT to love? Right? I really seemed to bond with the owner's wife. She's really sweet and down-to-earth. One day when we were in Ocean Reef (a NOTORIOUS yacht club where the crew is hardly allowed off the boat -- not permitted to eat in the restaurants or use the facilities... a real slap in crews' faces.), I had mentioned how cute her flipflops were, and she brought me back a pair! These shoes cost about $50!! NO LIE! (I looked it up online :) The last night of the trip, we were anchored out in Biscane Bay with the Miami skyline in the background. During dinner, the guests started playing their iPods and after a few bottles of wine, the ladies started DANCING! All the while, I was doing my serving thing, and eventually, the guests insisted that I come out and dance with them!! Well, I figured I'd humor them for a song or two, but as I tried to escape, the Mrs. grabbed my arm and made me stay with them! They danced until 1 in the morning, and all the while, the Mrs. made me stay with them! They were so funny! They also kept trying to fix me up with their sons and nephews! The Mrs. kept telling me about her single son, and another lady was telling me that I'd be "so cute" with her handsome nephew who just got out of a relationship! CRAZY, huh??

Anyway, the owners invited me on their next trip leaving on May 20th -- if I don't have a permanent job before then, of course. At the moment, I DON'T have anything permanent, and it looks like The Chief's foot has gotten worse, so she won't be going on the next trip. It'll be a TON of work for me, but stews do it all the time, and I think the trip will be SO much more relaxed without her running around like a maniac freaking out because we ran out of water on the fly bridge when there are plenty in storage and all we gotta do is replace them...

I've had several interviews over the past few weeks -- a few that left me with a bad taste in my mouth, and others that I am very excited about. Who knows? I just pray that I get SOMETHING soon because I don't have anything else lined up. I've been in this situation before, so I know that everything will be fine. But, it's just nerve-wracking.

OH! I read the BEST book the other day... Well, maybe it isn't the BEST, but it's SO witty!! The opening line says, "The Lord gives and most women piss it away. Perhaps that's why they lack the equipment to aim." I knew after that line that I was gonna ENJOY this one!! It's during the Depression about this woman who leaves her little Tennessee town after she catches her fiancee in bed with her sister. When she returns three years later, she's travelled the world, made money, and decides to open a whorehouse... It obviously causes quite a stir, but it's funny how her business venture manages to put the town back on it's feet and bring her family back together! Anyway, it's called The Wilde Sisters by Paula Hall. I picked it up off a book exchange shelf at a shipyard where I was doing some day work. Needless to say, I'm eager to read it again!

Anyway... what else? Oh yes! I've been doing a lot of thinking lately -- maybe it's all the chemicals I've been inhaling as I clean? I've been in "the industry" for about a year now, and I've begun to realize how much I've grown in the past year. So, in no particular order, here are the changes I've realized:

1. I now, FEARLESSLY, take the bus all over the place (public transport may be low-class, but for a buck and a quarter, I can get almost anywhere... Pretty sweet, if you ask me.)
2. I've lost about 15 pounds... YAY!
3. I can tie lines -- and I understand the physics behind them!
4. I am used to being propositioned for sex, and ignoring the jerks in the cars doing so (and not taking it personally). They couldn't handle me anyway. RAWR!
5. I've cut up my credit card--and cancelled it
6. I've slept in more places in the past year than I have in my LIFE -- home is where I lay my head...
7. I've realized the freedom of carrying around ALL my possessions... maybe the homeless have something here...
8. I don't enjoy drinking as much anymore... it's just a means to a usually regretful end
9. I LOOOOVE SUSHI!! (Thanks to Chris and Boston and Oya... Good times!)
10. I cannot live without Jolene, my guitar. She's more than a friend.
11. Debt is a master, and I am its slave. BUT NOT FOR LONG! (Thanks to my awesome parents!)
12. My mom will always love me, no matter what trouble I get myself into. Sometimes we just need to talk.
13. I like country music. (I blame Jenn for THAT ONE!)
14. It IS possible to smile at memories after a heartbreak. And, it is ALSO possible to be friends with an ex.
15. The idea of teaching again makes me sick to my stomach.
16. I couldn't imagine doing anything else right now... but I COULD imagine doing it SOMEWHERE ELSE!
17. I can survive being horribly sick (strep throat!) 700 miles away from home. I don't know what I would have done without my friends, though. Note to self, ALWAYS have someone around to help take care of me when I'm sick. And always have health insurance.
18. I don't NEED a car. I don't WANT a car. I don't HAVE A CAR!
19. I can't look at my life with a "grass is greener" attitude. There will always be something I'm missing out on -- living in Charleston for 2 months earlier this year showed me that.
20. There are very few things in life that I really NEED. In fact, much of what I carry around isn't essential.
20. I am a survivor.

So, that's all I've come up with for now. I'm sure I'll think of more as I work today, but for now I've had four hours of sleep and can't get BACK to sleep, even though my brain is fuzzy. BUT, that has inspired me to begin a list of goals (outside my bucket list)... SO, again in no particular order:

1. Narrow my "essentials" to one EASY TO CARRY backpack and my guitar (yes, Jolene is VITAL)
2. Get completely out of debt. I'm on the road, and am finally beginning to see the light. AH! RELIEF!
3. KEEP loosing weight. That has been one of my biggest handicaps in this industry. That and the fact that I'm not European, blonde, blue-eyed... what? Are all yacht owners HITLER?!

I think three goals is enough for now.

Okay, so I hope I've fed your addiction for a while... there's lots more to write about, but sometimes I wonder if I reveal too much on here. This IS a public forum and who KNOWS who is reading this? (It's not like I ever get any comments from you guys!) Anyway, I don't intend on going so long between posts again. Life has been rather topsy-turvy lately. Not that I expect it to settle down anytime soon... but...

2009-04-16T14:21:00.001-04:00

I think I'm gonna throw up.

Um... this is too perfect...

2009-04-12T10:43:00.002-04:00

Okay, so I'm on the way from Savannah to Miami with the crew of Blue Moon. I arrived onboard Wednesday night, started work on Thursday, and have positively fallen in love with the crew. When I arrived, the two stews I'm working with had stayed up to welcome me! How sweet!

Thursday, I woke up to a beautiful morning with the crew mess bustling with people... around twelve or thirteen crew members scrambling to get breakfast. I had seen pictures of everyone, but that doesn't compare to seeing them in reality. It was quite overwhelming to meet them all, but quickly, I got comfortable. Of course, it helped that the bosun joked around with me -- telling me that I should deliver his coffee around seven thirty every morning, and that I didn't get breaks. That morning, one stew and I polished every mirror on board. But, we didn't flip on every light and spray the Windex. Oh no! Quite the opposite... we worked in the dark with flashlights ("torches" she called them) and dry, lint free rags. Let me tell you! It's amazing what you can find in the dark! We must have worked for a good two hours. Of course, mirrors on board aren't just limited to the bathrooms. There were mirrors on the ceilings, walls, and doors. They are just as much for decoration as function. That afternoon, we finished laundry and vacuumed. FUN! Really, the first day is quite a blur. I just remember it was a good one.

Friday morning, we polished MORE. Gold this time. I know you're thinking, "Surely that didn't take a long time." Heh. Think again. I didn't realize that just about EVERYTHING metal on this boat is plated in gold--outlet covers, door hinges, door knobs, faucets... My question is this: why in the WORLD would anyone want to put a metal that tarnishes on something that gets touched ALL the time?? Hence the need to polish it all the time. Friday afternoon, the three of us drove over to the crew house to finish cleaning it before the crew moves in once we return from Miami. The kitchen was DIS-GUS-TING!!! It looked like the previous tenants had a molasses fight or something because brown gunk was dried all over the place. I did my best to get it off, but we only had so much time. Ugh.

Friday night the crew threw a braai (South African bar-b-que). It was SO much fun! The food was great, and the crew is fantastic, so we had a blast! I drank too much wine and had a slight headache the next morning, but I laughed more than I have in a long time...

Saturday I laid low -- slept late, read a bit of my novel, and hung out in my cabin most of the day. NIIICE!

Sunday, we took off for Miami, 30 hours underway. The girls had 4-hour watches inside, while the guys had navigational watches in the bridge. Basically, the boat turned into a ghost ship. Everyone not on watch tends to gravitate toward their cabins. I tried to help the girls, but they wouldn't help me, so I just got out of the way and hung out in my cabin for the day. I have two portholes beside my bed, so I watched the water go by for a while, until I got queasy, and then I turned on my iPod and listened to Ender's Game, one of my all-time favorite novels.

This morning, I slept late but made my way up to the bridge for a breath of fresh air. I was able to talk to the captain for a few minutes -- his way of interviewing me, I suppose. We talked about how I got into yachting, what I did before, why I left teaching... and he told me that they were interviewing two other girls for my position, and they would let me know if they wanted to hire me or not in a few weeks. I wasn't sure if that was a good sign or not, and I really wish that the chief stew had told me that I was only riding with them to Lauderdale. But, oh well. I'm sure all will work out as it should. I just wish I hadn't left my guitar in Charleston. Cest la vie.

Anyway, the plan for the week is to work like crazy getting the boat ready for the party on Wednesday evening, then I need to be off the boat by Weds night so that they can leave early Thursday morning. They welcomed me to stay aboard with them back to Savannah, but I meant to come back down here. But, you have NO idea how devastating this is for me. I don't WANT to stay in Lauderdale! I don't WANT to come back to this hell-town only to not be sure if I am going to get a job or not... I WANT THIS JOB!! I WANT TO STAY HERE!

My head is SPINNING!!!

2009-04-07T00:52:00.002-04:00

Okay, so this morning EVERYTHING changed.

Last night, I was planning on flying into Fort Lauderdale on April 15th, meeting with the boat I heard from, and deciding from there whether I wanted to join them or not. Last night, I thought I had plenty of time to prepare, catch up with friends and family, and pack. Last night, I figured I'd still be broke for another few weeks.

But, this morning, I opened my email to find a note from the chief stew requesting that I meet them in Savannah, work with them for the rest of the week, ride down to Miami, serve at the party they are hosting, and decide if I want to stay with them. Of course, I'll be paid like a day worker, so I won't be just VOLUNTEERING my time. What a PERFECT idea, I thought... except that I am flying Air Tran, and they don't serve Savannah. SO, I am flying into Charleston and taking a train to Savannah. CHARLESTON?? SO, I get to hang out with my girls for another night! YES!

Of course, I am sacrificing some things to leave early... Christy and I were supposed to go to a concert this Friday and to church on Sunday. I was supposed to paint more of my parents' house to earn money. I was *hoping* to sell my car! But, all those things have changed... as always seems to happen in yachting.

Anyway, there is SO much more I wanted to write, but I can't remember it right now. Plus, it's late and I REALLY need to get some sleep before my looooong day of travel tomorrow... um, today. Ooooh boy. Let the fun begin...

The Next Step... for now.

2009-04-04T23:58:00.008-04:00

What a wild ride my life has been these past few months! And, it only continues to get more wild! I went to the doctor on Thursday, sat through a few hours of an IVP and the mortifying two minutes of a cystoscope only to be told that my renal function looked perfect and there was nothing the doc could do for me. Unsure of whether to be elated or concerned, I drove home believing I have experienced a miracle. I'm healed, I suppose? I've decided to not do anything unless I have more problems. So there.

But, my finances have continued to hound me. I have REALLY gotten myself into a world of hurt, and if I don't find a job QUICKLY, there's no TELLING what is going to happen to me. My parents have been wonderful, especially my mom. She's agreed to pay for my health insurance, car insurance, and car payment until I can get money to pay her back. Of course, I'm mortified and ashamed of myself for being almost 30 and still dependent upon my PARENTS for support. As a result, I've not said much of anything for the past several weeks. The tension in our house has been pretty palpable as I creep around just trying to stay below the radar. The other day, my mom and I had an argument that turned into a heart-to-heart... complete with weeping and confessions and hugs and "i love yous". We unloaded all we'd been holding in for the past few weeks -- she asked me if I was angry with her, and I confessed that I was ashamed of myself. I told her how she'd hurt me with some of the things she said, and she apologized for her poor communication. It was healing to talk to her again, like friends again.

I got an email yesterday about a 198' boat looking for a stew/cook. It's a beautiful boat with 16 crew members from England, Australia, South Africa, Canada, Peru, and the US. It sounded great, and I hope it works out!! Finally, I think my fortune is turning around! YES!

... And then I came home...

2009-03-25T22:25:00.002-04:00

So, I'm home now... almost 2 weeks since I returned and my life has been forever changed. The stories and faces, flavors and sounds have been forever tattooed on my heart, and I will never look at my puny life the same. Maybe one day God will send me back, maybe not. Whatever the case, I will forever champion their cause.

But at this point, I'm back home and awaiting some word on what my next step is... Going to the doctor tomorrow to find out what is going on with me. I'm expecting to need surgery of some kind. But what then? How will I pay for said procedure? How long of recovery are we talking about?

And after THAT, what should I do? My parents and I have been struggling with my finances like crazy, and we're looking at possibly selling my car. Cool with me, but how will I get around then? Of course, if I get on a boat, I won't NEED a car. BUT, if I go back to Charleston (which is what I'm hoping for), I WILL need a car (and a reliable one at that). If I stay here, I can get a cheap clunker that my brother will be working on every weekend. AHH! It's ALL SO DIFFICULT!

Whatever the next step is, I KNOW that God's got it under control. I know there are some people who think that I'm crazy for thinking this way... I've been brainwashed into believing that God's gonna send money from Heaven to pay my bills. But, I can't help but remember how He's taken care of me in the past. Not just with money issues but by keeping me out of situations that would harm me and by putting me IN situations that prepared me for more difficult times... One of the songs that's been especially on my heart these past few days is a song by Ginny Owens called "If You Want Me To". It's seemed to be my testimony and hope over the last two months especially, and I draw a great deal of strength knowing that there IS a reason for all this insanity...

The pathway is broken
And The signs are unclear
And I don't know the reason why You brought me here
But just because You love me the way that You do
I'm gonna walk through the valley
If You want me to

Chorus:
Cause I'm not who I was
When I took my first step
And I'm clinging to the promise You're not through with me yet
so if all of these trials bring me closer to you
Then I will walk through the fire
If You want me to

It may not be the way I would have chosen
When you lead me through a world that's not my home
But You never said it would be easy
You only said I'd never go alone

So When the whole world turns against me
And I'm all by myself
And I can't hear You answer my cries for help
I'll remember the suffering Your love put You through
And I go through the valley If You want me to

Day 16: The Life of Jesus... in 12 hours.

2009-03-25T22:23:00.001-04:00

This morning, we took a tour to Bethlehem. Before we could get into the city, though, we had to present our passports, have them thoroughly checked. One lady in the tour group ended up not allowed to go into the city because she is Israeli -- even though she holds dual citizenship and is a resident of America now. We all felt terrible for her.

The inside of Bethlehem’s walls are covered in protest graffiti. The Palestinian residents basically reside in an open-air prison. They are not allowed to leave and Israelis are not allowed in. It was eerie going into the city, and yet, I’m so glad I did.

Our first stop was the shepherd’s fields -- the site where archaeologists believe the angels came to the shepherds. It’s completely different now -- with paved sidewalks and churches and fountains built on the sight. But, the cave where the shepherds would have lived is relatively in tact. The floor is a mosaic dating back to the Byzantine church. I was amazed that we were allowed to walk on such a national treasure. And the ceiling of the cave was covered in soot from centuries of fires within the cave. Amazing!

Our next stop was at the Church of the Nativity -- the sight where it is believed that Jesus was born. The sight is actually three churches in one -- a Roman Catholic, a Greek Orthodox, and a Lutheran -- each sight sharing the birthplace in their basements. We first entered the Orthodox church -- the oldest constantly active church in the world, 1500 years!

The doorway is small and narrow -- only small children would have no trouble entering without stooping. Our guide said this was to keep the Crusaders from galloping in on their horses and destroying the place. The nave is adorned with columns with the saints painted on them, incense burners hang down the middle of the room, and sunlight streams in from windows near the ceiling, a good 45 feet above. Trap doors open to reveal the original mosaic floor dating back to the Byzantine era. Orthodox priests were strolling about, blessing people, taking money for prayers. This REALLY bothered me. We then stepped through the main sanctuary of the church -- gaudily decorated with anything shiny and ornate. It made me a bit sick with all the cheap-looking shine.

Down a few steps toward the basement is the sight of the birthplace -- now reduced to a star on the floor of what looks like a fireplace. A few feet away is a small nook with a marbled manger. Sandy was telling me that at Christmas, the churches put a baby in the place... she said it looks like a dead baby. Anyway, pilgrims bend down to kiss and pray at the spot, and the line can be quite long to see the spot.

After finishing in the basement, Kimmie and I went up a different flight of stairs into the Catholic side of the church. We heard singing and saw a procession going through, and within moments, we knew it was a funeral. Our suspicions were confirmed when a group of pall-bearers came by and we saw hands outside the top. EW! From there, we toured another part of the basement with all sorts of caves throughout. This area was dedicated to the children Herod had killed after Jesus was born. It was a very solemn place. Our guide said that the Catholics keep the bones buried, but the Orthodox side leaves their bones as they are -- if dirt comes off them, then so be it. Kinna gross, I think.

After the church, we shopped at a place owned by Palestinian Christians -- apparently VERY much in the minority there and persecuted for their faith. They were wonderful people, and my heart goes out to their situation. Praying for the peace of Jerusalem has a whole new meaning to me now that I’ve seen it.

We didn’t even stop for lunch since there was so much to see in the old city. By 2, we were finished with the tour, and we made our way through the old city toward the Western Wall. The old city is perhaps the COOLEST place I’ve ever been. There are VERY few places for cars to drive, and most of the “streets” are walk ways lined with all sorts of shops -- tourist shops on the fringes, but getting more “every day” the deeper into the city you go. Somehow, we managed to get past the shops without breaking the bank (it wouldn’t be hard there! their wares are beautiful and pricey!)

We got to the Western Wall and Sandy commented that it wasn’t as crowded as it was last time she was there. (She was in Jerusalem over Christmas -- DUH!) The place is SO sacred and I could feel God’s presence there. I approached the wall, found a place to work into the crowd, and I knelt to pray. Many of the women there had prayer books, and they were praying and swaying. I’ve never understood the usefulness of pre-prepared prayers. Wouldn’t God want to hear our heart? Anyway, I prayed and placed my written prayers into the cracks in the wall. They were already brimming with bits of paper -- some very old, others fairly new. I felt part of a family doing that... it was weird... I felt strangely connected to the other prayers in the wall.

After the wall, we wanted to find the Church of the Holy Sepulcher -- one of the sights believed to be where Jesus was Crucified and Buried. While we were looking at the map, we were approached by a guy claiming to be part of the tourist board. He offered to show us around (for a price, of course!) and Sandy allowed him. He took us to this GREAT overlook where we could see the Dome of the Rock and the skyline of Jerusalem. It was beautiful. Then, he took us down the Via Dolorosa -- the 14 stops Jesus made on the way to His Crucifixion. It was interesting, and while I never trusted the guy, I’m glad we did walk the streets where Jesus walked. It helped make the crucifixion real to me. He left us at the Church of the Holy Sepulcher, and that was when I KNEW that he was a con artist. He didn’t want anyone to see him walking around a tour group on his day off... Whatever.

We went into the church, and again, I saw the gaudiness of organized religion. The church was dark and foreboding with crowds of pilgrims kissing a rock (that had no inscription??) When crowds were around the cross, we decided we’d had enough of the “Jesusland” insanity, and we left for the Garden Tomb.

The Garden Tomb is an underrated and well-kept secret of the city. In contrast to the commercialized insanity of the other places, the gardens are serene and manicured. From a platform, I saw what they believe to be the Rock of the Skull -- Golgotha -- where Jesus was crucified. It is just outside the northern gate into the city, and beside the road where “passersby” could have easily mocked Jesus. Through the garden, there is a wine press and cistern that can hold 2000 gallons of water, all dating back over 2000 years. Obviously, the owner of the garden was very wealthy. There is a tomb cut out of rock on the far end of the garden. Archeological evidence supports this as the sight of Jesus burial because there is space chiseled out of the rock to make room for a body not originally meant for the tomb. In addition, there are two unfinished burial plots in the sight. On the wall outside, the first Christians carved an anchor with a cross -- signifying this as one of the first places where church services were held. Inside is a Jerusalem cross dating back to the Byzantine era.

This day definitely gave me LOTS to think about. I think the tour guide said it best when he said that we don’t KNOW if this is the correct sight or not. But, what does it matter? Jesus isn’t there! We don’t worship and serve a dead Jesus. We serve a Jesus who rose again and defeated death. So, what does it matter WHERE he was born, died, or rose again? The POINT is that HE DID!

We were starving after not having eaten since breakfast, so after the tomb, we went BACK to the old city for one last round before we called it quits. At the Jaffa gate, we ran into a guy who was smitten with Kimmie the day before. We asked him where to get good falafel, and he directed us to “Falafel Gabbi’s” in the Christian Quarter. He gave us directions and told us to tell Gabby he’d sent us. Once we made it to the man’s little stand, we understood. We walked ALL through the residential areas, and even had some of the locals asked us if we knew where we were going! Sandy and Kimmie are WAAAY too nice, so I spoke up before they had a chance to answer. The falafel was the best I’d ever had, and after I scarfed down my pita, I could have eaten another.

Day 15: Meeting with World Vision

2009-03-25T22:22:00.001-04:00

We made it into Tel Aviv just after 3 am, skated through the airport, and caught a shuttle to Jerusalem. By 5 am, we were nestled into our hotel room. We had a meeting with World Vision at 2 pm, so we caught some sleep and were back out by noon for lunch.

At lunch, I saw my first Hassidic Jewish family. The parents couldn’t have been older than mid-20s, and they had three children (with another one in the oven!). The wife had her hair tucked into a hat while the husband had his black hat on almost the whole time. They both wore black. Their son had bright red hair and had on his yamica. He also had tassels out of his pants. It intrigued me.

The meeting with World Vision went well, and after that we took off for the old city. By that time, though, it was getting late, so we walked around the Armenian quarter for a few minutes and headed for food in a really up-scale mall area. The food was good... I think I had pasta again... LOVE ME SOME PASTA!

We walked back to the hotel by the light of the street lamps. I never once felt in danger or threatened. Everyone is very friendly and helpful... at least, that was OUR perception.

Day 14: Meeting the lions and Flying to Israel!

2009-03-25T22:21:00.000-04:00

We met Teddy this morning to talk about Invest in Children and what they do. Teddy is a local pastor who is interested in opening a clinic for mothers and children escaping the sex trade. Apparently, trafficking is rampant in Ethiopia, and many women and children have AIDS because of it. SO SAD!!

Getu joined us for lunch and we went to a local place for lunch. I had been craving pasta, so I ate fettucini alfredo. It was SCRUMP (as Tracy would say)!

After lunch, we went to see the LIONS! Finally, I got to see lions in Africa! These were in a zoo sort of deal, so it wasn’t in their natural habitat, but I got closer than I probably would have gotten on safari. They were GORGEOUS, and Kimmie got some GREAT pictures of them!

By 4, we had to be out of our room, so we packed up and met Getu and Teddy for dinner at the hotel. Before that, Kimmie and I walked around the grounds and took pictures -- SILLY ones.

Dinner was and AWESOME buffet of all sorts of foods -- Italian, Asian, Ethiopian, Middle Eastern... SOOO GOOD! I stuffed myself.

We made it to the airport for our 11 pm flight to Israel and had some time to shop. That was when I realized I was missing $20. Still haven’t found my money, so oh well...

At some point in the airport, I got VERY claustrophobic and started feeling like part of a cattle drive. We were shuffled from one large area into a smaller waiting room into a SMALLER waiting area... I began to experience the panic and unease that Jews must have experienced during WW2.

Day 13: Addis Ababa

2009-03-25T22:20:00.000-04:00

Because we had such a LATE night the night before, we slept in a bit today. But, we had to meet one of our contacts, Getu, for lunch and a brief tour of Addis. We went to one of the local craft markets to find some gorgeous scarves -- many of the ladies here are Moslem, so they wrap their heads in public. I noticed that MANY of the goodies in these markets were very similar to what we found in Uganda. I had no way to compare prices (without extensive thought) since Uganda uses shillings and Ethiopia’s currency is the birr.

Ethiopian people are beautiful. Their skin is a rich caramel color, their features are fine and regal -- thin noses, high cheek bones, black, curly hair, long limbs and thin fingers. They have an exotic mystery about them.

At the market, we also encountered our first bit of begging. Almost as soon as we got out of the car, children were at our sides seeking food or money. I had nothing small to give them, and it really made me uncomfortable. Even while we were sitting in traffic, people came up to our windows. One kid, after seeing that we were an entire CAR FULL of white people, called his sister over and they both started singing to us. It was pretty insane.

We ate lunch at the Hilton hotel -- the three of us ordered Ethiopian -- once again AWESOME! Although, I’m not a huge fan of injira bread. It has the consistency of a sponge wrap and tastes vinegary. I’d rather eat my Ethiopian fare with pita bread, thank you very much.

After driving around Addis, we came back to the hotel and decided to get massages in the evening. We were in “detox” mode after being in Gulu for so long, so a deep massage was just what we needed to recharge. The spa at the hotel was just as posh as the lobby. The floor was a gorgeous mosaic that followed us into the ladies locker room. On the ladies side of the spa, there was a long corridor with dressing rooms, a sauna, jacuzzi, and massage rooms. The most shocking thing I saw was a topless lady just walking down the hallway like nothing. I can understand being topless in the locker room, but in the MIDDLE of everything?! Brazen...

Once again, we ordered room service where Kimmie found a hair in her food and was so grossed out she almost puked. Honestly, I think my reaction would have been the same.

Day 12: Off to Ethiopia

2009-03-25T21:50:00.001-04:00

At 6 am the next morning, Kimmie and I awoke for an early start to the hospital. I was feeling FANTASTIC -- no pain, no soreness, no exhaustion -- but I knew that it was thanks to some REALLY good drugs. Because we didn’t know if we’d have time to pack after we returned from the hospital, we packed all our bags and carried them to Bosco’s van. Our flight to Ethiopia was leaving at 5 pm, but Kristoff’s was leaving at 4, so we needed to be at the airport by 2, and we needed to leave Kampala by 1:15. Since we knew how time in Africa works, we aimed to be finished with the doctor by 11.

The Kampala hospital took us straight back to see the doctor, who, as expected, sent us to the lab for blood work. I suppose I was still quite dehydrated because my veins rolled and dodged the needles like nobody’s business until the tech was forced to pull blood from my wrist. I’m now sporting a lovely 4 inch bruise. I swear, with all the pricks in my arms, I look like a drug addict.

The blood test showed that my WBC was down to 8.5 -- within the normal range, but still a bit high. The doctor still wanted an ultrasound, but I had to go to a lab outside of the hospital to get that. Because it was already 8:30 and we didn’t know if I’d have time to come back to see the doctor, we asked for antibiotics and promised to get the ultrasound. He complied and we made our next stop.

The ultrasound showed some interesting results. What I thought was appendix pain turned out to be a mass on my bladder. The doctor said the mass was 3 cm by 4 cm and appeared to be mixed -- cystic and vascular with water pockets. The mass was blocking part of my ureter and inhibiting my ability to urinate completely -- thus causing the infection. Because I was on antibiotics and pain medication, I wouldn’t have any problems, but as soon as I got off of them, the infection and pain would come back. So, the final decision was to cut the trip short and get me to a hospital in the states. The doctor said I may need surgery.

We were out of the office by 11 as we hoped, had time to make it back to the hotel for one last lunch with Kristoff, and just enough time to get Kristoff to the airport before they closed the gate.

The trip to Addis Ababa, Ethiopia was relatively uneventful. After being shuffled through what seemed like ten thousand security checkpoints, we had to wait in a room for yet ANOTHER security stop... We landed in Addis at 9 pm and checked into our super-swank hotel room at the Sheraton Addis. Perhaps the nicest hotel room I’ve EVER stayed in. The hotel even provided BATH SALTS for us!

We were famished once we got to the room, so we ordered room service (my first EVER!!). I ordered Ethiopian -- unsure of what I would get, but feeling a bit adventurous. I LOVED it! They use a spice called berbere that is spicy but not scalding hot... YUM!

Day 11: Back to Kampala

2009-03-24T08:03:00.001-04:00

The next morning, Kimmie and I were ready to go by 7 am. Bosco arrived at 8:30, but we didn’t make it into the sunshine until well after 9. First, I had to be re-examined by the doctor, have my discharge papers written up, pay, and be given a shot “to go” of the good stuff that knocked me out the night before.

The shot was the last thing before we left, and I was really quite scared that I wouldn’t make it long enough to take a shower, eat breakfast, and pack before I zonked out. But, after the good sleep I got the night before, the drug just made me giggly as we bounced around the Gulu streets. A “Women’s Day” parade marched in front of the Acholi Inn as we approached, so Kristoff and Sandy welcomed me in the gate. They commented about how much better I looked. I assured them that it was the shot I had been given. (Speaking of shots, I’ve figured out why alcoholic drinks are called ‘shots’. Just like the medical term that takes effect immediately, the alcoholic version ALSO goes straight to the brain and makes one the entertainment of all around. Rabbit trail, I know... so humor me.)

Miraculously, I giggled and slipped my way through a shower (AH! The RELIEF!), packing, and breakfast. But after all that, I climbed into the van and crashed. I barely remember hugging Lucy good-bye and thanking her for all she had done... Now, it amazes me at how close I feel to this woman who had been a perfect stranger 48 hours before. Emergencies tend to draw people closer, eh?

The road to Gulu was just as dusty, hot, and bumpy as it was when we first traversed it, but I was asleep for much of the ride. Kimmie said we made pretty good time considering the fact that Bosco drove SO slowly over the potholes and bumps. She said that most people passed us. I do vaguely remember the sickening smell of diesel fumes, though.

Once we got into Kampala, we first unloaded at the hotel. I wasn’t feeling very well because I hadn’t eaten much and I was exhausted (even though I slept, it was uncomfortable). We decided to get food before Kimmie and I reported in at the Kampala hospital. We walked over to the food court as usual, and I dreaded being mobbed by the servers from the various restaurants. I felt queasy and didn’t feel like eating in the first place. But, I braced myself for the onslaught and tried to think of what I might be able to stomach. I had to eat SOMETHING, and I figured rice would be the most gentle on my stomach (and the easiest to throw up if necessary). Kimmie and I ate quickly and we left with Bosco while Kristoff and Sandy stayed behind at the hotel.

The Kampala hospital was WORLDs better than Gulu, although still well-used. By the time I saw the doctor, I was wiped out from the past few days and I was starting to hurt again. The doctor said that he wanted a new ultrasound and new blood work, but the labs were closed, so I’d have to return in the morning. He did give me stronger pain medication and sent me on my way. The pain meds worked wonders and I slept soundly through the entire night.

Day 10: Goin to the Hospital!!

2009-03-24T07:56:00.001-04:00

At some point in the night, the pain tore into my side. It started as a stab -- like a cramp from not breathing properly -- and before too long escalated to nothing I’ve ever experienced. In addition to that, I began throwing up everything I had eaten at dinner. Assuming it was something I ate, I expected the pain to subside and to be able to sleep. No such luck. The entire night, I kept Kimmie awake with my pacing, tossing and turning, vomiting (lucky her!), and groaning. I had NEVER been in such pain. Thinking (hoping?) I just had a BAD case of gas, I took some gas medicine...I might have just taken a baking soda tablet with all the help it gave me. By dawn, I had nothing left on my stomach to vomit, I was exhausted, sweaty, and still writhing with pain. The team left me to attend their workshop while I stayed in bed, hoping to get better before lunch. Just in case, Sandy left her cell phone with me so that I could call Bosco to come get me when I was ready.

By 11, the pain had crept around to my back, and I couldn’t walk without feeling like my intestines were going to spill out of my stomach. I called Bosco in tears and asked for Sandy. “I think I need to go to the hospital. I can’t stop throwing up and my side hurts!” Within minutes, Bosco and Lucy were at the hotel to take me to the hospital.

This is where the adventure BEGINS! The Gulu Independent Hospital is the best facility in the town. The structure is typical concrete block with ancient paint and red-dirt yard. The inside smells like day-old B.O. baked into the brick. Acholis (Gulu residents) crowded the benches lining the walls and stared quite obviously at the pitiful looking Muzungu shuffling in.

After registering, I plopped down on the bench nearest my butt and tried not to let the smell overwhelm me. After puking for 12 hours, smells were the LAST thing I needed to keep my stomach in tact. But, somehow I concentrated on the cracks in the floor and survived the excruciating minutes until the doctor could see me. His office was a small room with an examining table that had an old bed-sheet for a cover. As I laid down for him to examine me, I wondered how long it had been since the sheet had been washed, how many sick bodies had lain exactly where I was, and what strange illnesses I was coming into contact with. I had to stop thinking such thoughts or I’d never make it out alive. The doctor ordered labs and an ultrasound of my abdomen, so I trekked over to the lab -- holding my stomach to keep everything inside -- and got stuck. Apparently, I have no blood in my left arm because every time I’ve been stuck the past several days (yes, I’ve been stuck more than once!), nobody could get anything out. But, the tech did get a sample and the results determined that I had a white blood cell count of 18.8 -- VERY high... So, there was infection in my blood. Greeaaat! I moved over to the ultrasound lab--everything was in three different buildings--and THAT guy found my bladder looked abnormal. He said that my appendix and bladder was inflamed. Much to my horror, the doctor decided that I needed to stay the night to get intravenous fluids, antibiotics, and pain meds. Curled up on a hospital bed with another old, well-used bed sheet, I got the news that I wasn’t going anywhere for a couple days. I was terribly dehydrated and at risk of rupturing my appendix. At this point with the hope of no pain, I was game for whatever I needed to do. So, the doctor stuck the pick-line in my hand, the nurses prepared a private room for me, and I called Sandy to update. While we waited, Lucy held my hand and prayed with me. She assured me that I would be okay and that God had everything under control. I teared up at her gentle words. They were just what I needed; yet, I missed home terribly and I wanted nothing more than to have my mother there with me.

My room was just off the main corridor. It was rather large with two ancient beds with 3 inch mattresses and (you GUESSED IT!) well used bed sheets. These seemed clean at least. And the mattresses were vinyl, so maybe nastiness didn’t sweat into them too much. There was a small oscillating fan mounted on the wall and that helped TREMENDOUSLY with the sweltering heat. One bare bulb hung from the ceiling. In the corner was a sink basin sans towels or soap, and a small bathroom around the corner. My room was ground level with a house and children playing right outside my window.

When I got into the room, the nurse hung my first bag of fluids. She put the pain meds in my bag and gave me another shot directly in my vein. It lessened the pain for about 45 minutes, and then I was crying for some relief. Lucy, who had been curled up on the other bed, went in search of the nurse who came in, stroked my leg, and tried to comfort me. She told me that she couldn’t give me another dose for four more hours. I was devastated. So, she came back a few minutes later with a dose of something she had to shoot in my rear end. Gladly, I bared it. It lessened the pain for about two hours, but again, I was back to begging for some relief. By that time, the team had finished with their day of teaching, so Bosco went to pick them up and brought them straight over. Seeing their faces brought such relief, and I know I looked like death warmed over between the pain and the sweltering heat (but I wasn’t sweating anymore... hmm?), but I didn’t care that I had frizzy hair and a stinky body. I was so happy to see familiar faces!

Kimmie came in, gave me a hug and told me that she wasn’t going anywhere this evening. She was staying with me. And I’m SO glad she did! After a few minutes visit, Sandy (who had written down what we wanted her to bring back from our room), Kristoff, Bosco, Patrick, and Lucy all left to get the items, eat dinner, and then pass out the school supplies to the kids. They returned around 9 pm when I had slept for a while and gotten more pain meds in my system. I was feeling MUCH better... but I didn’t look or smell any better. Oh well.

Kimmie and I stayed up and talked for a while after everyone left again. At times, I drifted off to sleep, and she read. Once a male nurse came in to check on me, and without stopping to put on gloves or wash his hands, he started fiddling with my pick line (which I had been bleeding from). Then he rinsed his hands in the sink (with questionable water), wiped them on his pants, and proceeded to help himself to Kimmie’s bag of cashews. The look on her face was a mix of horror and malice. What in the world was he doing? She didn’t eat another cashew that night. In fact, they made their way into Kristoff’s hands the next day, and he donated them to the goats along the road back to Kampala.

At midnight, my nurse came in and gave me a shot that burned like fire going in, and eventually spread the warmth to my fingers and toes, my stomach and head. Within minutes, I was floating on a cloud. It scared me a little to be so out of sorts, but at the same time my pain was gone for the first time all day. I slept for three hours solid.

When I woke up, Kimmie was nestled in the bed where our *good* nurse had made the bed with clean sheets. I drifted in and out of sleep for the next four hours. Sometimes Kimmie was awake, and sometimes she was asleep, but it was always a comfort to see her there beside me. It would have made for one lonely night without her.

Day 9: Preparing for Teacher Training

2009-03-24T07:54:00.001-04:00

Kimmie got sick today. She had been queasy all morning, and just before we got ready to leave for town, she started vomiting. The poor thing. By mid-afternoon, she had bounced back, and she realized that the combination of her malaria meds and vitamins she’s been taking reacted to her not having breakfast first. Yuck.

Having to leave Kimmie behind at the hotel, Kristoff, Sandy, and I took off with Bosco to meet Lucy in town. We stopped by the bank to change over some money and then headed to the two shops in town that sold “Muzungu” souvenirs. It was almost exactly like the stuff in Kampala, but almost HALF the PRICE! I was shocked and excited and then bummed to discover that I could have saved SO much money if I’d waited. Cest le vie.

Lucy took us to her pastor’s house where we looked at beautiful Acholi bead necklaces. Acholi beads are made from rolled up bits of paper. The sizes and way they are rolled often creates beautiful shapes and the various colors on the papers creates beautiful textures. Anyone who’s known me for a while knows I’ve always LOVED beaded jewelry, so I was in heaven. I was sad I didn’t have more money to buy beads, but I did walk away with a beautiful pink strand (PINK! It’s my new obsession...) which Kristoff commented on at least three times over the next day.

That afternoon, once we returned from town, I joined Kimmie with last-minute preparations for class while Sandy met up with Patrick to shop for school supplies in town. Patrick is another Gulu resident who spent two years as a child soldier. His harrowing story begins with LRA soldiers raiding his village, holding his family at gun-point while they raped and murdered his sister. He then was abducted with his brothers and forced to become a soldier with the rebels (or risk his brothers being tortured, dismembered, murdered... you name it). He stayed with the rebels for two years watching his brothers die -- in battle or by LRA hands -- before he escaped. He then worked hard to get his education and now is well-respected in the community. He has a weekly radio show on the Gulu station, he works with the kids in the area with after-school kid’s club, and he tries to help families affected by the war.

Day 8: Back to Gulu

2009-03-24T07:52:00.001-04:00

We returned to Gulu today, Thursday, said farewell to Murchison. We’d miss the beauty of the lodge and the luxury of the meals. Gulu isn’t quite as glamourous with their accommodations or or food availability. But, Gulu DID have air conditioning where Murchison did not! We took a different road back to Gulu this time. Instead of traversing over interstates which would be smoother, but take longer, we went along a dirt road that took us past several villages and IDP camps. This was MUCH more rough, but definitely favored all around. We got to see the “real Uganda” here--as if we hadn’t seen enough already. Part of it was enlightening. What seemed so hard to grasp before -- the grass-topped huts, women carrying firewood on their heads, men using whatever means necessary to cart what they needed -- was no longer so shocking anymore. Not that I suddenly accepted the poverty. But, I realized that these people have lived this way for thousands of years. They have families, well-behaved children, and close-knit communities that we don’t have in the states. Why is that? They are not unhappy (as a general rule) with their lot in life, and I wonder if they see “Muzungus” as trying to destroy their heritage as we are so infamous for doing. Yes, they need healthcare education; yes, they have political unrest; yes, they have social problems. But, the core of their society is very positive. Some, of course, see whites as their savior. The solution to all their problems.

This evening, we went out to eat and met Lucy, a Gulu resident and former employee of World Vision (before they pulled out of the area a few years ago). I don’t know all the details of her story, but I do know that at one point, she was forced to run away from home with nothing more than her school books. And this past year, the government had her brother killed because he was speaking out against corruption. Currently, she’s getting ready to undergo surgery for a large cyst on her ovaries. She’s had a difficult run, that’s for sure.

Day 7: Morning Safari and Work Day

2009-03-24T07:50:00.001-04:00

This morning we hired a guide to take us around the park looking for lions. Some groups before us had had success with their searches, so we hoped to be just as lucky. So, we pulled ourselves out of bed at the crack of dawn -- 6 am -- to be ready to leave by 7. In Africa, any given time is delayed by half an hour, so we ended up leaving around 7:30. We saw a beautiful sunrise, though, and a family of elephants cross the road... I swear! we can’t seem to keep them away! We never saw the lions, but we did get some amazing views of the Nile river -- the White Nile, I’ve since been told -- and saw tons of birds and deer... and of course giraffes! They are SO neat!

That afternoon, we HAD to get some work done, so we camped out in our rooms -- I met with Sandy and Kimmie about the training on Saturday as we reorganized and packed our bags, created posters and visuals, and rehearsed what we would talk about. Our training was originally supposed to be two days, but (as so often happens) we had to cut it back to one day. I feel SO sorry for the teachers, having to understand in one day what it took me several days to wrap my mind around. But, that was the time we were given, so we’ll do our best with it.

Day 6: The Falls and a River Cruise

2009-03-24T07:48:00.001-04:00

Our first full day at Murchison Falls, we took the ferry across the Nile into the park to see the highly acclaimed water falls. Now, I’ve seen some pictures of pretty incredible waterfalls, but I think what makes Murchison so spectacular is that the ENTIRE contents of the Nile flows through 7 meters of rock wall. It’s a fairly narrow passage, so you can IMAGINE how the water churns and roars through the chasm, eh? The falls were breathtaking. Even more when I climbed onto a rock (as close as I dared!) near the edge and looked down. And the rainbows were EVERYWHERE! They were beautiful! Pictures don’t even come close to doing this place justice! I could have sat on my rock and watched the water flow for hours, just basking in the beauty of God’s creation...

That afternoon, after a quick lunch, we set sail for the falls again, only at a different angle -- a river cruise! On the cruise, we were able to see even MORE wildlife that hangs near the water. We saw TONS of hippos, crocodiles, beautiful birds (the weaver birds were my favorite! Their nests are so cool!), and another family of elephants. We only spent a few moments at the falls, but it was all we needed to see the falls, snap a few pictures and move back down the river. It was rather odd, really. The ferry ran us directly into a huge boulder in the middle of the river, we climbed out, did what we needed to do, and piled back in. No more than 10 minutes really. Weird.

That night, we had another close encounter with the local wild life. On our way back to our rooms after dinner, we saw a mother and baby elephant eating in the vegetation nearby -- literally no more than 30 feet away! We were enthralled to be so close to such power and beauty, but terrified of the consequences if we startled the mother. Mamas are fiercely protective of their young! I guess after a two-year gestation, you want to keep your hard work around for a while! So we were extra quiet -- even I managed to squelch my squeals of delight -- and before long, they moved away into the night.

Day 5: Murchison Falls

2009-03-24T07:44:00.001-04:00

Gulu is a pretty rough area to stay in. Not only is it fairly undeveloped (the nicest hotel in the city is about equivalent to a cheap hotel in the states), but there is NOTHING to do. The people of the town have no real use for “tourist” attractions, although there are local bars and hang-outs, but Muzungus would stand out there. SO, Sandy opted to take us to a near-by game park for a few days between our camp and teacher training. There we could take in some of the wildlife, rest up in relative luxury, and regroup for the weekend ahead.

So, early Monday morning, we left Gulu for Murchison Falls, a safari park on the Nile River. Before we embarked, we stopped in Gulu to get some cash at the bank. Kristoff and I stayed in the van with Bosco while Sandy and Kimmie went inside. From across the street, a ragged boy saw me and yelled, “Muzungu!” Within moments, he was at my window, reaching his dirty fingers into my comfy little world. “Muzungu?” he asked helplessly. Bosco pulled ahead into a gas station, and I took that as my cue to roll my window up. The boy approached the other side of the vehicle where Bosco was able to talk to him. I looked at Kristoff -- who had already spent 6 weeks in Uganda -- and asked what to do. He said that the boy sees white people as a type of “savior” -- when they are around, they give away good things. If we gave the kid money, we’d be feeding into that and crippling him from earning things on his own. So, we don’t give money to beggars.

On the way, we passed through several IDP camps -- Internally Displaced Person. Baboons in the middle of the road are a common sight in Uganda, so when we drove upon a crouching shadow in the middle of the highway, I figured it was a baboon, like we’d seen all along. However, as we neared the figure, the baboon turned into a boy. He was skinny, dressed in rags, and glaring at our van. My heart shuddered and then burst to see such a sight. However, our driver didn’t slow down or move over. At first, I thought he was heartless and cruel; and I glanced back at Sandy whose eyes were the size of golf balls. She asked the question I was thinking, “What was that about?” Bosco answered, “Who knows? Maybe he was angry? Maybe he was mad (crazy)?” This most definitely wasn’t the most harrowing sight he’d ever seen, but it will be forever emblazoned on my mind. Once again, I realized the vast dichotomy between myself and the culture around me. First the beggar boy in Gulu and now the crazy boy on the road.

Once we got into the game park, we were greeted by wildlife EVERYWHERE. Within minutes, we saw water-buffalo, kobe, gazelles, antelope, warthogs, and giraffes! We even saw a family of elephants in a nearby valley! The “big daddy” elephant was running off another bull, so we got to see the standoff and the runoff! It was pretty cool! Then, once we neared the lodge, we came upon an elephant coming out of the woods, and apparently we startled the bee-jee-zus out of him because he slid on his heels, stopped for a moment, turned around, came back toward us, and went on his way. We were able to get some pretty good shots with him less than 30 feet away, too!

The lodge was really cool! When we pulled up to the front door, a doorman greeted us with cool scented towels and cold fruit juice. The decor was like something out of the 1800s -- dark woods on the floor, old world furniture. The lodge seemed to be made out of all local materials. Our room had a fantastic view of the Nile, and I woke up every morning thinking, “I can’t BELIEVE I’m looking at the NILE RIVER!!”

Every lunch and dinner was a four-course meal with soup, salad, main course, and dessert. We NEVER walked away hungry! In fact, by the end of our stay we didn’t FEEL like eating! Of course, the weather was quite hot and we didn’t have air conditioning in our rooms, but cold showers were readily available, soo...?

Day 4: Kid's Camp

2009-03-24T07:41:00.002-04:00

The second day of camp was just as wonderful as the first. The kids were as receptive and sweet. At the end of the day, the boys and girls sang a good-bye song to us... it almost made Kimmie and I cry! But what REALLY tore at our hearts was when we were loading the van, some of the girls teared up and lingered by us. They were so precious. We gave them hugs and told them that we would be back again.

I spoke with Patrick today about his testimony... He spent two years as a child soldier -- after watching his sisters raped and murdered, his parents tortured, and his brothers abducted. After escaping the LRA, he found schools to give him work and an education and he worked his way back into society. He has an AMAZING story that I pray is recorded some day. If God wills it, I'd do it myself!

Uganda Day 3: Kid's Camp in Gulu!!

2009-03-15T20:32:00.003-04:00

(Side note... I'm posting these late, but I'll date them as if I posted them IN Africa. Hope y'all can keep up!)

So today was kid’s camp and what a GREAT day it was! As always, we ran late, but Africans don’t work on a clock, so we were fine. The kids were fantastic. Ranging from 11-15 years old, they were so wonderful to work with--helping each other, participating in class and games, and always smiling.

The day was hot, but the school where we worked was perched atop a hill, so we were blessed with a nice breeze all day. I’m exhausted right now after all the excitement, but I’m content. At the end of the day, the kids herded us outside for a complimentary performance! As if the welcome song wasn’t enough, they pulled out the drums, the girls donned their dance skirts and bells, and they proceeded to put on a show! It amazed me at how cooperative they were with each other. The older kids -- girls and boys -- took turns leading the dances. Nobody got upset because they didn’t get a turn; and nobody commented on another kid’s direction. They just went with the flow and enjoyed performing. When we left that day, they chased after the van waving at us.

Uganda Day 1: Kampala

2009-02-26T15:11:00.002-05:00

Okay, so I'm just gonna pick up where my last post left off.

We met Sandy and Kristoff for lunch and we walked over to the "food court" a few buildings down from our hotel. Before we ate, though, Kimmie and I needed to exchange our American dollars for Ugandan Shillings. I gave the teller $70 and walked out with over 130,000 shillings! I felt rich, until I started seeing the prices! The food court looked like a one in a mall in America -- the perimeter housed the various food choices -- American, Chinese, Cuban, Lebanese, Indian, Italian -- and the center contained tables. I wasn't expecting the... ahem... ATTENTION we recieved when we arrived, though. Before we could even get seats, we were being hounded by representatives from each restaurant shoving menus on our table in our faces. If we took too long looking at one menu, another one would appear in our hands or the servers would point out items that we might like. There is no concept of personal space here, that's for sure.

After a satisfying lunch of Chicken Tikka Masala and Beef Curry (Kimmie and I shared), we took off to town to run some errands before heading into Gulu. We searched out a place to print the student manuals for our two-day kid's camp this weekend. At the third place, the courthouse, we found someone able to print and bind the manuals. The "printing" was to be done on an ancient copy machine stacked atop an even MORE ancient copier, housed in a "library"-- more like a small bedroom with shelves built around the edges. The walls were dingy ivory, streaked with who knows what flavor of brown gunk. After settling up on a price and a time to return, we returned to the market to "get our shop on".

The market consisted of 15 to 20 stalls of various sizes containing all sorts of treasures -- the typical African-style dresses and shirts, carved masks, baskets, necklaces and earrings, soapstone statues. Before too long, each stall began to look the same, although some did have unique items. Kristoff found an AWESOME drum with beautiful carvings all over it. I bought several things to bring back for people, and the COOLEST part of the whole deal was how inexpensive everything was! I did get some great deals, but it wasn't without it's fair share of stresses. The vendors must have known I was a sucker because they drew me in with a sweet "You come in. I'll give you a good deal!" At one stop, the ladies kept giving me dresses to try on -- dresses I didn't like and hadn't even been looking at! Once I finally said, "No" to each one and said that I would only buy the two items I wanted, they went up on the prices of the items. I managed to talk them down -- calling them on it -- and I think they were rather disgruntled, but they weren't going to fool THIS muzunu (the African term for "white person"... kinna like "gringo" in South America).

By 5:00, we were shopped out. We walked back to the courthouse to pick up the manuals, discovered that they weren't finished and to come back in an hour. An hour later, he still hadn't finished, so we agreed to come back in one and a half hours. At this point, we were exhausted and ready to go to the hotel, so we fought traffic -- and people selling vegetables and street preachers and boda bodas (scooters that carry up to 3 passengers). At times I didn't know where one lane ended and the other began, but Bosco was driving, and we were in a sturdy van, so I felt safe. In fact, I have never once felt threatened or fearful. I shopped at the market alone for part of the time, and I felt just fine. Of course, it was day time, and honestly as we were driving to the hotel last night, some of the things I saw didn't feel welcoming, but I'm not going out at night without at least two others and one MUST be a man -- if not Bosco, our driver.

SO, tomorrow, we are off to Gulu. The road is five hours of dirt, without "decent" bathrooms, and with PLENTY of bumps and potholes. I've come armed with my ginger pills as well as Dramamine in the case of an emergency, but I don't want to take anything if I don't have to. As long as I can get fresh air, I should be fine. Once I start getting hot, I get nauseus. YUCK!

In Gulu, we will not have any internet, but we'll only be there until Monday morning when we'll trek to Murchison Falls, further west. I'll be taking plenty of pictures, but my computer isn't cooperating with the internet here, so I don't know when or if I can get these things uploaded. I'll try to get facebook to cooperate, but the internet is so slow that I think the large sizes of the pictures overwhelms the system. I am trying to upload the photos to facebook and maybe I can link the album on to here? I don't know. Right now the sluggishness of the computer is mixing with the exhaustion in my body, and creating frustration! But, I think a few days away from technology will be good for me. I'll take plenty of pictures, though... and maybe I'll take some videos with Sandy's camera? Hers is far superior to mine!

Anyway, my patience is running short with this computer and I have to be up and at em by 8 in the morning, so I'm signing off for now. Keep praying for us as we journey deeper into the bush tomorrow. Pray that our drive will be swift and without hassels, our hosts would be receptive, and our health will be good!

GOOOOD MORNING, UGANDA!

2009-02-26T03:53:00.002-05:00

As I post this, it's almost noon local time, and 4 am back home. My body feels like it's been dragged across the Sahara and back again, but I'm happy. I SAW AFRICA out my window this morning! Actually, I saw a golf course, but I'M IN AFRICA!!!!

Anyway, we landed in Entebbe at 1:30 am, after boarding the flight in Amsterdam, being delayed due to the Turkish flight crashing, having to wait until emergency crews cleared the area, THEN having to turn around mid-flight due to hydraulic problems. In all, we didn't actually get to Entebbe until 5 1/2 hours after scheduled arrival. BUT, we are safe and have all our luggage! Praise God!

When I stepped off the plane, I realized QUICKLY that I wasn't in Kansas anymore. The air was humid and warm, mosquitos EVERYWHERE, and the smell of a barnyard permeated everything. And SILENCE! Not like back home where there's always some noise intruding. No, the silence was refreshing and comforting.

Once we made it to Kampala (about 30 minute drive from Entebbe), we settled into our room, took showers (but were careful to keep our faces out of the water due to the risk of parasites), and settled in for the night. I slept like a rock, only waking when Sandy called to see if we wanted to get lunch. (We're supposed to be meeting her now!)

I don't know what today holds, but I'll be taking pictures. I'm rather frustrated because my computer isn't picking up the internet, so I have to use Kimmie's. It'll make things more difficult, but I'll get some pics up.

Thanks everyone for your prayers, don't worry about me, and keep in touch!

Stuck in Amsterdam...

2009-02-25T08:33:00.002-05:00

Okay, so Kimmie and I have made it across the Atlantic to Amsterdam. Landed at 8 am, boarded our flight to Entebbe at 11, as scheduled, and had to turn around mid-flight because of a broken hydraulic system. We are scheduled to board the next flight departing at 3:45, so that will put us in Entebbe closer to midnight.

We are exhausted with our schedules being completely screwed up and our sleep being uncomfortable and quick naps. However, my adrenaline is keeping me going. I'm sure I'll crash tomorrow, if we can EVER make it to Africa!

I gotta run. Not much time left on my paid internet. LOVE you all!

2009-02-23T02:37:00.002-05:00

So, I know I need to sleep because today (Monday) is bound to be one stinkin long day. Our last day to wrap everything up before we leave for three weeks. Hard to believe in 48 hours I'll be on a plane bound for Amsterdam!! EEEK!

Anyway, I had to write about how incredibly BLESSED I am to be here and have the friends I do. Tonight, Curly Paul had a "Shrove Sunday" party where he made pancakes and we pigged out on his culinary delights... crepes, dutch babies, pumpkin pancakes... you name it! But, the best part of the whole evening was the fellowship. I met some new friends and reconnected with some old ones. We ended up staying until 1 am talking about relationships -- misconceptions we have, things we don't understand, and those ever-torturous "what ifs"... And, as I drove away tonight, a sense of dread began to grow within me. A foreboding that I may be required to leave these wonderful brothers and sisters before I am ready. Can I do it? Will I EVER be ready to leave them?

I've promised to do what the Lord has for me, and even though I don't know what that is, I know that He has my best interest at heart, and sometimes that will mean sacrifice and giving up some things that I love. But, the thought of saying goodbye to my family here is almost as hard as saying goodbye to my "real" family back home. I've bonded with these people, shared in the laughter and tears and frustrations. They've rooted themselves in my heart, and I'm not so ready to let them go. BUT, I will follow the Lord wherever He leads, and if that means away from these wonderful people, then so be it.

Africa, Israel, What I Know So Far...

2009-02-20T10:13:00.002-05:00

So, this week and last has been a WHIRLWIND planning/preparation for our trip to Africa. We still have a good bit to do, but somehow we've managed to get a LOT done already! SO, here's a brief run-down of what we've been and will be doing.

-- Prep for the Journey --

We will be working with traumatized youth in a village called Gulu, Uganda. It's a SUPER-long, winding, and difficult story to explain (I don't even know all the ins and outs of it!), but suffice to say that this village has seen atrocities that we could never IMAGINE. Thus, they are traumatized--suffering from post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD), depression/anxiety, and suicide. Invest in Children (the organization I'm going with) uses music and art to help kids all over the world -- Indian reservations, Russian orphanages, hurricane-ravaged Honduras, etc. -- recover from their wounds. While we are in Uganda, we'll be hosting a weekend camp for kids and then training the teachers in the community on how to work with these youth.

I've been learning a LOT about the brain -- how trauma (even minor) can cause a change in mood, behavior, and cognitive ability -- and much of what I've been learning I'll be teaching at the training.

-- The Trip Itinerary --

Tuesday, Feb 24th

Depart Charleston at noon, for Newark. Depart Newark at 7 pm for an overnight flight to Amsterdam.

Wednesday, Feb 25th

Arrive in Amsterdam at 8:15 am. BRING ON THE HASH BARS! Hahaha... just kidding. Depart for Entebbe, Uganda at 11 am and arrive at 9 pm. Stay in Kampala. SO, the first leg of the trip will take us 18 hours.

Thursday, Feb 26th

Adjust, sleep, acclimate to the new climate, culture, and time zone!

From Explore. Dream. Discover.

Friday, Feb 27th

Prep for camp and head to Gulu.

Saturday and Sunday, Feb 28th and Mar 1st

Kid's camp in Gulu. I'll be leading worship, small group, and teaching the "soul cards" class (basically collages), and whatever else needs to be done! Here's an example of my soul card. The theme of the collage is "Things that Give me Hope"

From Explore. Dream. Discover.

Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Mar 2-4th

Trip to Murchison Falls National Park for rest and relaxation, preparation, a safari?, shopping?

Thursday or Friday, Mar 5th or 6th

Back in Gulu to prep for teacher training.

Saturday, Mar 7th

Teacher training. I'll be teaching the session on PTSD and Soul Cards.

Sunday, Mar 8th

Church?

Monday, Mar 9th

Depart at 5 pm for Addis Ababa, Ethiopia. Arrive at 7:15.

From Explore. Dream. Discover.

Tuesday, Mar 10th

Meet with pastors and counselors seeking to open a safehouse for women and children escaping the sex trade. Will probably learn more about this in the near future.

Weds, Mar 11th

Depart Ethiopia at 11pm

Thurs, Mar 12th

Arrive Tel Aviv at almost 3 am.

From Explore. Dream. Discover.

Friday-Sunday, Mar 13-15th

Meet with contacts about camps, tour Jerusalem, maybe go to Bethlehem?

From Explore. Dream. Discover.

Monday, March 16th

Depart Tel Aviv at 10 am, Arrive in Newark at 4 pm (a 12 hour flight, though!); Arrive in Charleston at 10:30 pm. HOME!!

In all, I'll be logging almost 17,000 miles and almost 40 hours in the air. QUITE a journey, eh? But rest assured, I'll be logging every step of the way -- I invested in a 1 gig memory card and extra lithium batteries, I'll be blogging and uploading my pictures every chance I get (which may not be often if we are in areas where internet is expensive or unavailable).

A Little Bit Lonesome...

2009-02-19T22:20:00.002-05:00

Okay, so I don't know if I'm hormonal (probably) or getting stressed about the upcoming trip, but tonight I got depressed for the first time in a LONG time. Nathan had come over to practice dancing with us -- Nicole, Misha, Tracy, and I -- and things started out really well. We were all laughing, making mistakes, practicing what we had learned the other night at the Cha-Cha class. But, at one point, everyone started dancing with each other -- Misha with Nathan and Nicole with Tracy -- and I realized that I was the oddball in the situation. Everyone was laughing and recalling inside jokes and silly habits they had, and a wave of "I'm an outsider" washed over me as I saw their familiarity with each other. I can't dance as well as they can and haven't been dancing with them for long.

Anyway, my good mood went crashing down, and I retreated to Kimmie's room to pack for the trip. Kimmie never questioned why I had left the practice session, but I still had to fight back tears as I tried to throw myself into the packing and keep from throwing my pity party (which I'm an EXPERT at); but all the laughter and fun they were having on the other side of the door crushed me even more. They never even came looking for me. After Nathan and Misha left, Tracy and Nicole came into the room. Nicole said they had called for me, but Tracy said she'd never heard them looking for me. Whatever. They were having fun, and that's fine. I shouldn't have worn my feelings on my sleeve or been so sensitive. They didn't MEAN to hurt my feelings.

But, as I considered the crossroads that I am at in life -- how fluid everything is right now and how I don't know where I'll be once I return from Africa -- I realized that I should get USED to feeling like the outsider. If I return to yachts, I won't be like the other pirates and wenches who prowl the bars and pubs on their time off. If I stay here, I'll always be a year behind them in how much they know about each other and dancing and everything else. I've always longed for that sort of close connection with a group of friends -- like what I've had here these past few weeks. I don't want to lose that, but I also don't want to be considered "the new girl"... or the outsider. Not that they have EVER made me feel this way. As usual, it's based on nothing more than my own jealousy and pessimism. And, if I go back home, I won't be able to see things the same as I did before I left.

I definitely haven't gotten over my gypsy ways; in fact, I'm perhaps worse now than I was this time last year. I have gotten a taste of the adventure (about to get a BIGGER taste!) and it's whet my appetite for more! I'm content with living out of a bag, making do with what I have, and not indulging in manic shopping sprees. I'm free of responsibilities like rent/mortgage, a significant "other," and children, and I'm still to selfish to WANT those things right now. I'm finally figuring out who in the world I am, and it's scary and exciting and beautiful. But finding myself has been a rather uncomfortable experience in many ways -- my life has been reduced to a guitar and a duffle bag, I sleep on a couch, my heart has been broken and mended and broken again, I don't have my "own space" even though Kimmie tries her best to give me a little of it here and there. Even going "home" isn't home anymore.

I don't mean to sound so negative. Everyone I've talked to says I'm at a great place in my life. Kimmie calls it beautiful. I'm living life like Christ lived -- without earthly ties, solely focused on going where the Lord leads. Rich Mullins wrote a song called "You Did Not Have a Home" about how the world couldn't "own" Jesus because He didn't have a home here. And, in many ways, I can see how I'm being led into a closer relationship with God BY my restless heart. The things in my storage room and duffle bag are just THINGS -- replaceable and worthless in the grand scheme of things. Why do I even bother keeping all that crap anyway? In fact, I was joking with Kimmie how my possessions would be reduced to a backpack and guitar by this time next year if I kept at the rate I was going. And honestly? That's cool with me. I don't WANT to feel attached to my things. But, I still am. I'm still bound by social expectations to look a certain way. I still fill my silence with entertainments of various sorts. And I still crave the security of being prepared for every possible scenario. But, my desire and dream is to reduce EVERYTHING into a day pack -- live off the provision of God in the situations I find myself. Have my journal and camera to record my adventures, basic hygiene supplies, a couple changes of clothes, and Jolene. That's all. I would love to be able to traipse around Europe alone and not be lonesome or afraid. I would LOVE to be able to REST peacefully while not knowing where the next day might take me.

And who knows? Maybe one day I'll be there. But there's always the knowledge of what I'm missing out on. So the question remains, what's the adventure and freedom and independence worth?

My Amazing Valentine's Weekend!

2009-02-15T19:12:00.002-05:00

Here in Charleston, my circle of friends is a LOT like Friends and Party of Five. It's a healthy mixture of single guys and girls who are all quirky and unique and TOTALLY AWESOME.

From Explore. Dream. Discover.

We're always getting together for one thing or another -- ballroom dancing on Saturday nights, church on Wednesdays, jam sessions, coffee, etc. -- but when the guys approached us about taking us out for Valentine's Day, we were flattered and honored.

First off, we stressed about the age-old "WHAT SHOULD I WEAR?!" dilemma. Nate said "dressy" but... really? Have you SEEN dresses these days? Some guys think dressy is a dress, skirt, skort or derivative of the aforementioned items. In THEIR minds, dressing up means not wearing jeans and a t-shirt, tucking their shirts in. GIRLS think dressy as cocktail, ball gowns, black-tie affair... So, on Thursday night, we finally called Nate to ask him to define "dressy"... we each had a different interpretation. After tossing out some foreign fashion terms to him (business casual? cocktail? party? church? bridesmaid? [hehe] We might have been speaking Swahili for all he was concerned...) he defined his idea of "dressy" as a "special occasion church dress".... "Think, Easter dress," he said. "Sooo... you want us to dress like pastel eggs?" Tracy asked, in a way only SHE can verbalize. After a moment's pause, he replied, "Yes, but without the pastels..." We hung up more confused than when we started. Thank GOD for the LBD -- Little Black Dress -- every girl's savior when she gets the call to "dress up".

SO, after solving our fashion emergency, we convened upon the house for a fast and furious gussy-ing up session. After donning my LBD, fixing my hair, and fastening my pearls, I looked like June Cleaver on prom night. Oh how CLASSY! The guys arrived promptly at 7:30, each of them proudly holding a white rose -- which they quickly passed on to the nearest lady. I have to admit, they cleaned up nicely -- button-down shirts, ties!, even dress shoes! After exchanging hellos and how are yous, we boarded our luxury mini-van and convoyed downtown to the Italian restaurant where our table waited. (They left NO stone unturned!)

From Explore. Dream. Discover.

After a delectable Italian meal, complete with insightful conversation and hearty laughter, we continued our "date" at Waterfront park where the guys continued to surprise us with a photo spree and then RINGs... well, Ring Pops... But, Nathan DID get down on one knee...

From Explore. Dream. Discover.

So, after we got our rings, NONE of us were ready to call it a night, so we took off for a romantic walk along the pier. One thing led to another, and before we could stop ourselves, we were DANCING!

From Explore. Dream. Discover.

We danced and danced until our feet ached almost as much as our faces from smiling so much. But, the night was not over yet. The guys brought us home, and as every great date ends with sweet kisses, ours ended with one from each of our handsome escorts.

From Explore. Dream. Discover.

Of course, as girls USUALLY do, we went inside and rehashed everything that happened that night -- marveling at how fortunate we were to have such sweet and thoughtful guys in our lives. We found out that NONE of us girls had ever been on a date for Valentine's Day before. So, this night was definitely special for each of us. In FACT, we all admitted that now, we're spoiled. Those men definitely raised the bar, and we girls won't be able to accept any carelessly thought out dates from now on. Too bad, boys. I've tasted the gourmet dating scene, so I won't be content with fast food anymore!

Things are going so well here. I haven't been as content and happy like this ANYWHERE else, and it just goes to show that I am exactly where I need to be.

The Journey of a Lifetime!

2009-02-11T08:50:00.001-05:00

I haven't said much about it, but that's because I don't know much about it myself. But, over the past few days I've gotten some more details about my upcoming trip overseas.

Kimmie and I will be traveling to Uganda for two weeks, Ethiopia for two days, and Israel for about 5 days. We will be working with children in Gulu (Uganda) who had been kidnapped and forced to become soldiers against their own people. Obviously, the horrors they witnessed while with the LRA (Lord's Resistance Army -- an extremist group terrorizing the people) have traumatized these children, so many of them deal with anger and depression and post traumatic stress disorder. We will be working with them using art and music to help them heal from the pain they have endured. We will also be training the adults in their community on how to understand their issues and work with them. For more information on this community, check out the Invisible Children website. There you can see videos about the plight of this community.

In Ethiopia, we will be meeting with pastors who are trying to open a safe house for women and children escaping from the sex trade. I don't know much about this, but it is definitely an atrocity that needs to stop. I'll post more info as I get it.

In Israel, we plan on meeting with contacts about starting arts programs there for kids who have been ravaged by the ongoing conflicts between Palestinians and Israelis. We will be staying in Tel Aviv for a few nights then moving on to Jerusalem. Sandy briefly went over some of the details about where we would be going, but I didn't catch it all. Again, more info to come.

The past few days, we've been planning for the trip -- today we packed supply suitcases and they are HEAVY!!! We also continued our study the psychological effects of damaging the brain -- through trauma, stroke, or drug use -- even if you never lose consciousness. It was fascinating that SO much can affect our moods, behaviors, thought patterns... an overactive part in the brain can cause depression, anxiety, aggression, even suicide. A DEAD part of the brain can impair judgement, mood control, and lead to addictions. It makes me want to get MY brain scanned and see what's wrong with ME!! HAHAHA!

In other news, tomorrow night we girls -- Kimmie, Tracy, Nicole, Beezee, Misha, and I -- have been cordially invited to attend dinner with the guys -- Nathan, Curly Paul, Duane, Jason, and Jacob. Our first concern (because we are all WOMEN!!) was, "What in the WORLD are we going to WEAR?!" We were told that it would be dressy attire as the boys are wearing jackets and ties, but guys have NO CONCEPT of what dressy means. Basically, if it's a DRESS, it's dressy. But, in women's world, there are casual dresses, business dresses, cocktail dresses, church dresses, summer dresses, ball gowns, prom dresses, bridesmaids dresses... need I go on? SO, needless to say, the past three days we've been in QUITE a quandary. We called Nathan tonight -- the only guy who would know the difference between a cocktail dress and a casual dress -- and asked him what EXACTLY dressy meant. He said "Easter dress"... soooo.... we were to look like dyed eggs? "Without the pastel colors," he clarified. OOOH... so that REALLY cleared things up for us.

In the end, we thank GOD for the LBD (Little Black Dress) that pretty much fits into ANY fashion emergency. So, we'll all look like we've just returned from a funeral, but we won't get any citations from the fashion police!

The Lord Giveth, Taketh Away, and Teaseth...

2009-02-10T00:43:00.002-05:00

My life the past several weeks has been one of surrender... I've lost my job, been sleeping on a couch, dependent upon the mercy and generosity of a house full of girls... I've surrendered my desperate "need" for security and plans for a life of day-by-day faith so much so that I am now leaving for Uganda, Ethiopia, and Israel in the next few weeks. None of this could have happened if I was still working on boats.

One of the hardest parts of my life to surrender has been a certain relationship. I have struggled with letting God have this part of my life for months. This person has been purposely out of touch and ignoring me, and it hurt me terribly to experience such closeness with someone, only to have that communication severed so abruptly. But, after last week's love encounter with God, I realized that my clinging to this person was only keeping me from everything I could be with Jesus. As my dear friend Christy once told me, "If anything is standing between you and God,say a situation or someone, then God is likely to remove it so you can concentrate on Him. When He is your first love He will give you others..." I knew that I needed to give this situation to the Lord, and everything would work out as it should. So, on my loooong drive home last Wednesday, I prayed to God about this person, asking God to have His way, give me strength to focus on Him and not on this other person... I prayed that on the drive home, too. I hadn't heard from this person in two months, and I didn't expect to hear from him ever... But, God had different plans.

When I logged on to facebook tonight, I had a message from him. After dealing with all the rejection, I couldn't deal with him suddenly popping back into my life. So, I decided to wait a day or two before replying. Before I had a chance, he IMed me and I HAD to talk to him then. Honestly, I'm so glad he did. We aired out SO much that I had been holding on to... Even now, as I mentally replay our conversation, I realize that it was all God's work. I don't anticipate hearing from him again for a while, but I do know that I am resting peacefully tonight because once again, the Lord is proving His power and love for me.

Today's Fortune Cookie says...

2009-02-03T22:36:00.003-05:00

"You will find good fortune in love."

Funny... Love was the very topic of tonight's church service... Love was the topic of tonight's dinner conversation... Hell, seems to be the topic of the month.

My birthday was yesterday. Whoopee. One more year older, one more year alone... I don't really like to celebrate birthdays. I'm not even thirty yet, but I'm already avoiding "getting older". Needless to say, I've done a bit of thinking in the past few days, and I've grown a bit sad that I'm swiftly approaching 30 and I still haven't found "the one." I was fortunate enough to be born, however, in the month dedicated to love (or in a single's perspective, the lack thereof), so with all the chocolate hearts and pink and red balloons I see, I wonder when I'll ever have those things bought for me.

Which brings us to tonight's church service. It was called "MeHarmony" and it was about God's love for us. How we can NEVER give away love if we haven't first accepted His love because He IS love. It began to make me think about some things in my own life...

We sang this song before and after the message, and it washed over me like a wave... it has been so long since I wept cleansing tears, and that is what happened to me tonight. I wept away all the junk that has been hounding me for weeks as I felt the Lord's arms wrap around me and pull me close. Nobody on this earth could ever love me like God has loved me. Nobody would take me back again and again after all I've done. Nobody would endure the torture and agony of execution in my place. Nobody. But God isn't human. He doesn't see like we see, or feel like we feel, or love like we love. And I am so glad for that.

So, as I drove home tonight, I realized that I have already had the greatest fortune in love. We all have.

Depression Strikes Again...

2009-01-31T20:53:00.003-05:00

I don't know why, but I've suddenly become depressed... Maybe it has something to do with sleeping all day, not having any money, and no job... Perhaps it's connected to my birthday coming up on Monday, being a failure at love, and not having a creative bone in my body... or maybe it's just that I haven't gotten enough sunshine today. But, I'm down.

All week, I've been promising myself that I would record some music. I've figured out how to get the settings right, and how to use Garage Band... I have all the right equipment. But, I just don't feel like doing this. Honestly, I haven't really felt like playing much at all lately. Some rocker I'll be if I can't "turn on" the performance even when I don't feel like it.

So, here I am, starting my third week on Kimmie's couch, depressed as hell because I feel like a bum and a moocher and a loser. I am seeking the Lord for the next step in my journey, and no answers are coming... so, I stay here for the time being. I plan on going home next weekend -- to see my family, file my taxes, and watch my sister's drumline performance. Honestly, I don't want to tell anyone because I don't want to tick everyone off for not coming to see them.

Anyway, I've been talking to my buddy Tristy (Christy), and she always has a way of lifting my spirits... I love her so much...

Okay, I think I've written my way into musical inspiration, so I'm gonna sign off and lay down some tracks.

Still Broke but Happy...

2009-01-30T00:09:00.003-05:00

Okay, so I've guilt-tripped myself into writing. Not really sure what could be interesting enough to blog about, but here goes.

This week has been nice, and I can't BELIEVE it's already Friday!

Monday was rainy and gross, but Tracy and I went downtown to pick up applications from some of the up-scale restaurants. Didn't get any call-backs... grrrr...

Monday night, I subjected Tracy and some friends to poetic torture as they all joined me at an open mic night at East Bay Meeting House. Little did I realize that we'd be forced to listen to two hours of poems before any musicians would be allowed onstage. Oh well, the real fun happened after we left anyway. I had been talking about how I had been wanting to go downtown and busk for money (play on the street). Nobody was really ready to go home, so Nathan suggested that I pull my guitar out and practice my skills. WHAT FUN! I played every three-chord song I could think of, and we rocked out.

From Explore. Dream. Discover.

Tuesday I went to Tracy's horseback riding lesson. Teddy, the horse she's riding, was obsessed with my sweater and constantly tried to pull it off me!

From Explore. Dream. Discover.

Tuesday night, Tracy and I went to Genesis. Worship was fantastic, the message challenging. It was nice. Last week, we went to sing Karaoke at Wild Wings... Of course, the girls made me get on stage, and I sang "Before He Cheats"... Between that and "Angel From Montgomery" I'm starting to build up some signature songs.

From Explore. Dream. Discover.

Wednesday, Tracy kept Owen and Rose. We went to Barnes and Noble to play with the train set and came back to Kimmie's house for lunch. I got out my guitar and Owen danced and played along... He's SO stinkin cute! He turns two in a few months, but I swear, he's the smartest kid... I taught him "Free Falling" and later that evening, he cracked his dad up with his new favorite song!

From Explore. Dream. Discover.

Wednesday night, I went with Nicole to St. Andrews for Bible study. The message was about allowing God to be LORD of our lives. The speaker tied it into The Chronicles of Narnia and how Aslan was more than just a comforter and protector, he was the RULER of Narnia. Anyway, it made me wonder whether I was allowing God to be the King of my life, or if He was just a "Mr. Rogers Jesus"... some nice old man who listens to my problems and gives me a hug and puts a band-aid on the boo-boo and sends me away. While God IS a Comforter and Protector, He should ALSO be the Sovereign Lord, the BOSS, of my everyday life. It's so easy to forget that because He isn't going to fight and force His will. I have to open my arms to Him and allow Him access to every part of my life. Tough to do, no doubt.

Anyway, today Tracy and I went to see Kimmie at her office downtown and met Tracy's sister-in-law and niece for lunch. I LOVE the homes downtown because they each have such character and historical significance. The pics I'm posting are a few years old, but these houses look the same today... We met up with Nathan who is working in a house up the street from Kimmie's work, and he gave us a tour of the house. It's SO neat an well-preserved.

From Explore. Dream. Discover.

This evening, I went with Nicole and Tracy to a prayer meeting where we prayed for an hour, read some of the Bible, and lifted up the city of Charleston. It was quite bonding for us to do that together. When we finished praying, we went over to Tracy's brother's house. He had come out to open mic night, and we decided that one of these days, we were going to busk together, so he pulled out his guitars and we practiced "Sweet Home Alabama," "Free Falling," and "Angel From Montgomery." We had a blast just jamming as Nicole and Tracy provided backup vocals and percussion... I swear, those girls are hysterical!

Anyway, Friday I plan on going to the dog park with Tracy, Owen, and Rose. Owen is SO cute when he plays with the dogs! Friday evening, everyone is getting together for Misha's birthday. I'm going to eat with them, but I can't go to the comedy club with them... I'm not strapped for cash YET, but as soon as I start paying some bills, I'll be hurting. So, I'm sticking to FREE or REALLY CHEAP activities right now.

As for the job hunt, I've been stalking craigslist hoping for some leads, I've posted a notice on the facebook group for Kimmie's church, and told just about everyone willing to listen that I'm looking for a job. I've been contacted about some jobs on boats, but I'm hoping that I can stay in town for a little while longer. Things are so great here. But, I'll go where the Lord leads me, even if I'll miss everyone terribly. I'm concerned about my finances, but I'm not worried. I know that if I'm where God wants me, He will provide for my needs... it's as simple as that.

And with that, I am going to sign off.

Broke but Happy...

2009-01-28T17:34:00.002-05:00

Okay, so I have a few minutes to write before I head out for church this evening.

I'm still in Charleston, still jobless, and still sleeping on Kimmie's couch. Not much on the outside has changed. But, I'm happier and more content than I've ever been. Something has changed inside me, something is growing, and I can't quite pinpoint what it is or what I'm going to do with it, but it's transforming the way I look at myself and the world around me. Suffice to say that God is moving.

I'll have more to post later...

The Start of Something Good...

2009-01-20T23:59:00.002-05:00

Okay, so I can't believe that it's already "technically" Wednesday. I'm still couch surfing at Kimmie's and, while I wake up with a backache every morning, I wouldn't want to be anywhere else... okay, I can think of some other places I'd rather be, but I know this is the RIGHT place for me right now.

Today I hung out with Tracy, one of the roommates. We woke up late, showered, and headed downtown to meet Kimmie and Susan for lunch. Our first adventure was parallel parking... every time Tracy tried to turn the wheel and back up, her car would moan and groan. It was HYSTERICAL. Actually, the entire DAY was pretty funny. We often found ourselves laughing hysterically about the dumbest things. And, even though I've only known her a few days, we ended up talking about some deep stuff, too. But, that's just Tracy. She's one of those people who makes you feel comfortable enough to pour your heart out to and act silly with. I've added another member into my Charleston family.

This evening, we went to a church service in North Charleston called Genesis. It was geared more toward younger twenties with rocking worship and pretty basic teaching, and honestly I wasn't in the mood to worship. But, Tracy and Nicole didn't give me a choice, and I'm glad they forced me to go. The only song I knew during worship was "The Remedy" by David Crowder Band and it broke me to tears. Both Nicole and Tracy just held me while I wept about everything that's been going on lately... It felt good, but I was still a bundle of nerves during the teaching and I had to fight hard to keep from breaking down again. I'm kinna glad that I'll have the day alone tomorrow. I plan on going for a run, doing some serious writing about what God wants me to do, and just basking in the silence of the house.

After the service, we went to Wild Wings with some friends of Nicole's. Turns out Tuesday night is their karaoke night, so Tracy FORCED me to get up there and sing "Before He Cheats" which is quickly becoming my signature song. I wasn't really digging the whole singing thing... didn't sing a bit at the service. Honestly, just haven't been feeling like it. But, I sang it anyway. Before too long, I was laughing and smiling... now, I still feel the burn of tears behind my eyes... sometimes even laughter and good times doesn't take away the sadness.

It flurried a bit today. I'm SO glad it's warming up, though, because I am completely unprepared for the cold! In FACT, I managed to rub a NASTY blister on my heel, so I'm now sporting my flip flops. I'm okay until I think about the fact that it's 35 degrees outside and my toes are naked. But Friday it's supposed to warm up a bit. Yay!

Oh, and Tracy and I went by the Charleston Marina today and I left my card with a broker and the dockmaster. I'm emailing my CV to them, so maybe I can drum up some work? Who knows...

Anyway, that's what's happening. Leave me a message. I need to smile.

Charleston... A.K.A. Home #3

2009-01-18T18:43:00.003-05:00

Yesterday morning, I took off from Fort Liquordale -- said goodbye to the boat, sunshine, flip flops, and perhaps yachting... for a while at least... and headed north to my home away from home, Charleston -- saying hello to warm friendships, laughter, and a emotional recharge.

The drive was 10 hours -- including the little stop I made in Jacksonville and a 30 minute circle due to misreading the directions. Needless to say, after my iPod went out in three hours, I had plenty of time to think my way into anxiety. Yet, the closer I drew to my Camelot, the more at peace I became.

What was in Jacksonville? Well, I stopped by Chris's mom's house to drop off some of his things. With things the way they are right now, I have no idea when I'll see him again -- he's in the islands, I'm here... and his t-shirts are not exactly easy to replace. Of course, he probably could care less about the clothes, but well... I didn't want to keep them around either. So, I pulled into mom's driveway wondering if this was going to blow up in my face or not. Honestly, I hoped that she wouldn't be there, so I could just leave the stuff on the porch and run away. But, as fate would have it, she was home. Chris's mother is a wonderful lady who has all the grace and poise of any well-bred southern woman. She welcomed me into her home, gave me a warm hug, and offered me food and drink. We had a great talk about yachting, the economy, Charleston, and of course Chris. In the end, what I thought might end disastrous turned out to be better for me than I expected.

So, when I arrived in Charleston last night, the roommates, Nicole and Tracy, were headed to ballroom dancing. Apparently, every Saturday night they go to a club and dance their little hearts out. How AWESOME is that?! I've always wanted to learn ballroom dancing -- taken some lessons but never anything more than the basics -- and there are some willing male participants in the group of friends... YES! I can't WAIT until next saturday!

This morning, I went to church and the talk was about living a life of no regrets. Amazingly, the very spot I'm in right now is the perfect place. One of the principles was to live passionately -- take risks and trust God. Hmmm... yeah, I'm in a great spot to take some risks. I've never been one to gamble with finances (love and hair, no problem, but money? NO WAY!). At this point, I'm pretty much being FORCED to trust God for provision. I know He can do it, and I know that this time in my life is a great time to deepen my relationship and understanding of His promises.

This afternoon, I went with Kimmie to a photo shoot. It was raining and gross, but our model was fantastic and gorgeous! We ended up having a blast and bonding despite the frigid rain.

But through all of this, God has been working. Something big is brewing... On the way, I saw a billboard for the Charleston Boat Show next weekend. This week would be perfect for trying to drum up some day work helping prepare some boats. Also, vendors always need people to work, so maybe I can pick up some money doing that? More importantly, I can make some CONTACTS!

Also, one of the roomies, Beezee, just left her job teaching the high school at a local Christian school. I'm familiar with their curriculum, have a secondary ed degree... I dunno. It's a option, for sure.

Lots of people are asking me how long I'll be in town, and I honestly don't know. I would love to record some while I'm here, but I don't have the money to put into studio time -- even though it's SUPER cheap. More importantly, I don't want to wear out my welcome and impose on Kimmie's kindness. I just needed a refuge to think and seek and follow. Thank God it was here.

On the Road... AGAIN!

2009-01-16T14:42:00.002-05:00

So, I've been packing my stuff into my bag... again... preparing to hit the road... again... and look for a job... again. I'm beginning to think / wonder if I maybe cursed myself by calling myself a gypsy? After all, I live out of my car for the most part, I can't seem to hold down a job, have a special passion for music, and I'm a bit of a rebel... Sounds exciting, eh? Well, it has it's good days. But, usually it's nerve-wracking and frustrating. I'm sure I'll enjoy it more if I just relaxed a little. Maybe some of my friends and family can spare a Xanax or two for the sake of charity?

I was writing in my personal journal (unseen by anyone but me!) about the whole situation and my words soon became a prayer. I started thinking about how Chris had told me back in November that I had the world at my feet, and before I realized it, I shook my head. "No," I wrote. "My world is at God's feet." And even as I wrote it, the most soothing peace washed over me. Like I was being dipped in a tub of warm water. And a voice tugged at my heart asking, "But what do YOU want to do, Laina?" I didn't have to think. I KNEW I wanted to go to Charleston.

So the plan for now is to head north. I'll freeze my butt off, but I hope that my heart is warmed and readied for the days ahead. I'm trusting in God to take care of me -- financially, especially -- as I obviously am incapable of taking care of myself... Who knows what sorts of amazing opportunities I'll come across up there? Of course, there's always the flip side -- who knows what I'll MISS out on down here? But, visiting Charleston is something I've been wanting to do for the better part of a year, and God is blessing me with the chance to do it. For the first time in a LONG time, I have peace as I leave. I don't know how long it's going to be before I get back on a boat, but I KNOW that God is with me wherever I may roam.

So, I am asking that those of you reading will pray for me on the next leg of my journey. Once again, the world has opened up for me, allowing me the chance to pursue music... Charleston also has yachts, so I'll take a trip over there to see what's happening. (The general consensus is that it'll be dead, though.)

Thank you again, and check out what I did yesterday in the post below!

Look what I made!!

2009-01-15T22:50:00.004-05:00

Okay, so it's my 100th post! YIPPEE!! Release the balloons! Strike up the band! Toss the confetti! Or just look at these pictures! A fitting illustration of how far I've come in half a year...

Table Settings

I call this one "Jungle Fever"

From Explore. Dream. Discover.

This one is "Orchid Dream"

From Explore. Dream. Discover.

Beach Bliss

From Explore. Dream. Discover.

Some Towel Art

Ernie the Elephant

From Explore. Dream. Discover.

Monkey Business

From Explore. Dream. Discover.

Turn Downs -- Have to turn down the bed for guests and set out chilled water and a chocolate. AH! To be RICH! This picture is for a kid's turn down, and instead of chocolate, I've set out bubbles and a little water toy. FUN!

From Explore. Dream. Discover.

Fortune Cookie: Your talents will be recognized and suitably rewarded.

2009-01-15T15:55:00.001-05:00

Hmmm.... this could mean SO many things... Let's pray it my reward is expedient!

And the Lord sayeth unto me, "Thou shalt NOT be comfortable."

2009-01-12T21:04:00.004-05:00

Funny how irony comes to bite you in the ass sometimes. I was just talking this morning (say 9 am) to my mom about my job and how I'm content to stay here for a year just to build up some time on my resume. No matter what the books may say, it does NOT look good to be a boat hopper. So, even though this isn't the kind of boat I want to work on, I was okay with taking the money and doing the job... biding my time, so to speak.

Well, damn if by noon, the captain comes in and says that the boss has decided to not have a stew aboard afterall... since the boat ISN'T moving, there is no sense in having someone dedicated to the interior. I understand where he's coming from, and honestly, I saw it coming... I was just crossing my fingers otherwise. At any rate, I'm to be off the boat on Friday. I don't know where I'm going to go, what I'm going to do, or how this little chapter will end, but I am slowly learning that God has interesting plans for me... and my family. Things have been rather difficult lately -- especially in the past week -- and as that great Amos Lee song goes, "You get right down to the bottom of the barrel and float back on top..." It's rather annoying how those great email catch phrases (When God closes a door, He opens a window; Hang in there; Everything happens for a reason...) have seemed to haunt me these last few hours as I try to plan and plot and figure out what my next step is going to be. Looks like I have some journaling ahead of me tonight.

So, pray for me as I go through these last few days aboard. I'm going to need grace, wisdom, and peace to get me through the days ahead...

Stagnant Waters...

2009-01-11T12:47:00.002-05:00

Hello there, my admiring fans...

I do apologize for being so quiet this week... things have been rather rough with my internet connection, my personal life, and well life in general.

My internet connection: We moved the boat into a garage called "The Boat House" down here in Fort Lauderdale. It's a great little idea. The boat stays covered -- clean and out of storms. But, our satellite internet is cut off. My Mac (that I STILL think rocks the cashbox) isn't picking up the Boat House's internet signal, so I've been forced to "steal" internet from the bakery across the street... THAT means that every time I want to get online, I have to step outside the garage, either sitting on the street or using the captain's truck as a desk, and *hope* that my signal will take. This has meant that emails take longer to download and send, IM conversations are touch and go, and webpages take forever to download. Needless to say, I've only been doing the "essentials". Today, however, I decided to give myself and my readers a bit of a treat and "splurge" on some iced tea at the bakery ... thus "stealing" my internet fair and square. :o) A week of internet is surely well worth the price of a drink. (It was damn good iced tea, too!)

My personal life: Heh... lets just say, things aren't working out how I'd hoped, and all I really want are some answers. My heart tells me that the absence of answers my be all I'm going to get, and I'll just have to deal with that. I'm trying to.

Life in general: I'm not where I hoped I would be at this point in my career... Still sitting in the boat yard, not moving, when it seems like everyone else is going and seeing and living the quintessential yachtie life. I don't mean to complain. I have a job and it's paying my bills. Others in the industry would most certainly LOVE to be in my shoes -- even staying still -- but... well, things just haven't worked out the way I had hoped. Funny... things seldom do.

Anyway, I was determined to get off the boat today. Yesterday I spent the day holed up in my cabin reading my buddy Krista's novel. It was WELL WORTH the time, I assure you. I couldn't put it down! She sent me the first few chapters of her first novel, and I can't WAIT to get into this one! The stinky thing about Fort Lauderdale is there isn't much to do around here unless you want to pay an exorbitant amount to park at the beach -- I could always take the bus, I suppose -- or drink yourself into oblivion. I could go to the mall, but what's the sense when I'm not in the mood to shop? I could go for a run, but I hate to run and it's a health hazard with all the crazy drivers around. It's too cold to swim, we don't have our intreped with us so I can't make Victor take me out manatee hunting... Oh well... I should make plans to do something next weekend... maybe visit my uncle Steffan's parents in Melbourne or fly up to Charleston to record some music... I really don't have the money to fly to Chuck-town, but I NEED to get some tracks laid down if I'm going to make some headway into the industry.

Okay, so that's a brief overview of where I am for those of you who love me so much that you keep up with me better than I keep up with myself... I love you SO much! Oh! And remember, when you leave me a message, make sure you leave your name at the end! Sometimes I can't tell who messaged me on here! Thanks!

Before You Said Goodbye...

2009-01-04T00:00:00.002-05:00

Okay, so as ALWAYS seems to happen, just when I NEED to sleep, I can't... and my Muse decides to work overtime. So, with two hours left before I am to crank the car and begin a 12-hour journey back to the boat, I am struck with a poem that I must get out because it's too genius NOT to record. Of course, it's also midnight, so I could re-read it tomorrow and realize this is all crap, but for now, I must share my slimy, slithering, bawling new child with the world.

Before you said goodbye we were comfortable...
... like faded blue jeans with holes in the knees and frayed hems
... like a nap in a hammock, swaying with the breeze and snuggled with the sunshine
... like a fire crackling on a misty winter afternoon.

But now, I am tortured...
... like a telephone that refuses to ring, silently screaming my loneliness
... like a dog, dead on the side of the road
... like a chocolate valentine melted and forgotten.

As always, I welcome feedback, even the negative... this kinda came out of something I'm experiencing right now, but I'm not sure if we are quite finished yet. It's complicated. But I do feel tortured and forgotten... whether he means me to or not.

A bold and dashing adventure is in your future?

2008-12-18T20:12:00.002-05:00

Oh? How distant future? because I'm headed back to Fort Lauderdale for what looks like the rest of the season... til March at least. So much for spending the winter in the Caribbean! DAMMIT!

Crusin'

2008-12-16T14:58:00.003-05:00

Okay, so I'm perched on the fly bridge (the highest deck on the boat) with the blue-green ocean stretched out in every direction. It's SO beautiful, I just want to jump in it from here! Yes, I've seen jellyfish all day, and there are TONS of sharks around this area... but the water is SO pretty!

The boys (boss and guests) are on the Intrepid (our 33' tow-behind speed boat) getting lunch and bar-hopping and we are going to meet them at Mackinaw Key. I should be doing laundry and ironing especially, but I just can't pull myself away from the view! I should get my camera and take some pictures... the first in months.

I did get a little queasy this morning. Took some ginger pills and laid down in my cabin for about an hour and I've been fine since. I'm SO trying to not use the ginger, but I think it's going to be essential until I can get my sea legs back again. Sometimes, It's SO hard to work while we're underway. The boat pitches and rolls (not as bad as when we're anchored out, though!) and it's all I can do to keep my balance. Because I'm trying to keep my balance, I end up breaking into a sweat and getting hot, and the quease sets in. I've been pretty good up til now, and I had told my captain and mate about my seasickness, so they are understanding. As much of a pain as it is, I'm kinna glad we are moving so much this week... the sooner my sea legs will grow back!

In other news, as we were shoving off from Miami Beach Marina this morning, I saw SO many jellyfish! I don't know what it is, but I'm fascinated by them! The ones at the marina were like the ones I'd seen before -- clearish with a clover patter in the center, and blush-translucent with a red edge. But when we stopped for a few minutes to pull the intrepid in, we saw this WHACKED out bug-looking jellyfish that was almost black-blue-green, floating on top of the water, with tentacles stretching a good 3-5 feet into the water. It was CREEPY! Looked pretty sinister...

Anyway, we've slowed the boat, so I'm gonna go find out what's going on... AH! The breeze is FANTASTIC!! Later...

Invasion of Pirates... the boss and his buddies...

2008-12-16T00:52:00.002-05:00

Okay, so I met my boss yesterday, and I must say, he's a pretty cool guy. This morning, I set up his omlett extravaganza station, he made a helluva mess, and I got stuck cleaning it... oh well. That's why I'm paid the big bucks, right? But really, he is very down to earth and approachable.

He brought 5 of his buddies on board, so I'm the only estrogen on the vessel, and I feel like my yacht has been overrun by pirates... they leave their crap everywhere, shoes kicked off wherever they may be, and clothes all OVER their rooms. But they are funny and laid back, so I don't mind picking up after them.

Honestly the past two days have been much easier than I anticipated. The boys pretty much take care of themselves -- except for cleaning UP after themselves! -- and keep to themselves. They've gone out both nights so far, and it looks like they like to stay off the boat and in the bars as much as possible. I say, "GO!" Tehehe...

Anyway, we're docked at Miami Beach Marina tonight and we're off to either Marathon Key or Key West tomorrow. I HOPE it's Key West because I desperately need to go to the grocery store (I'm having withdrawals since I didn't go at ALL today and I went five times this past weekend!), and I was too chicken to get off the boat by myself tonight. I know, I know... that's something I'm going to HAVE to get over. Also, I think I'm driving my captain nuts about going to the store because he was like, "Anticipate what we'll need..." WTF? When the boss requests something that wasn't on my list AND we go through stuff so quickly, what am I supposed to do? Bring home the frikkin grocery store?! There is only SO much room in the fridge.

I'm slowly getting more weighed down that I won't be home for Christmas this year. I know, it's part of the life I have chosen, but that doesn't make it any easier. I will definitely miss the traditions of gorging myself and laying around all day and seeing family and warming myself by the fire... and braving the cold to get more firewood! But, I am hoping to keep myself busy enough that I won't notice what day it is... that really does happen after a while. Every day is the same when the guests are aboard, so there is never a change in routine... every day seems like Tuesday... you just started and the end isn't in sight yet.

ANyway, I have to get up ridiculously early, so I'm turning in... Just wanted to update you all on the latest excitement! If I know you then -- Love you, miss you, want hugs from you... If I don't know you... well, that's just weird.

It's too early in the morning to come up with a catchy title...

2008-12-13T08:20:00.003-05:00

Okay, so it's Saturday morning, I've been up for over an hour with nothing to do... We leave in a few minutes for our new "home" at Bahia Mar, an hour's boat ride away. I finished everything I needed to do yesterday -- stowing the boat... and I'm just waiting to get out of this shipyard so that I can get some serious cleaning done before the boss comes on board tomorrow morning.

I'm a bit nervous about him coming... what if I royally screw up? The captain says the boss is really cool, but likes to be served... need to have bowls of nuts out, keep drinks in their hands... other than that, he's a jokester. Apparently, he's bringing six buddies for a "boys trip", so I figure there's going to be a lot of crude jokes, beer drinking, and crotch scratching. Whatever... I'm hoping to score some tips at any rate... wouldn't THAT be sweet?

I was thinking about how cool it is to be on a yacht... yeah, I know you guys back home are like, "Aw, shut up, ya braggart!" But, aside from visiting exotic locales, serving rich (and sometimes famous!) people, and following the sun, the BEST part of it all is that EVERYTHING I need is right here on the boat. I DON'T HAVE TO PACK! So, I'm headed to Key West either Sunday or Monday, and then next Saturday, we'll be headed to Nassau. Guess what? I don't have to worry about packing the right stuff, will I have enough room in my bag, will it be too heavy for security, will I need to buy more shampoo, or ANYTHING! IT'S AWESOME!

In other news, I SO wish I could go back to bed... I've been up since 6:30... went to bed at 9-ish, and I'm still exhausted. I don't have anything to do until we get into the marina... the shipyard is dusty and gross, so every time I dust a new layer settles onto the furniture! ARGH! Once we get away from the dirt and grime, we'll ALL be happier... the mate will be able to keep the outside clean for longer than an hour, and I'll be able to dust and enjoy the fruits of my labor.

Ummmmm... I don't know... I guess that's it for now... I just felt the engines rumble, so I guess the boys are crankin' 'er up. More to come...

Guitar Hero, I am.

2008-12-10T20:19:00.003-05:00

Hey there...

Nothing to report on the yacht front... or should I say bow? But, I did want to let you know that I'm becoming quite the guitar hero... No, I don't mean the video game with the colored buttons representing chords and notes. I mean that I am challenging myself with more difficult music... and I'm not ALLOWING myself the luxury of giving up! I've gotten the chords and tabs to several new songs, and I'm going to learn them in my spare time here on the boat. Hell, work ends around 5-6:00, and I don't go anywhere (at least not here in Fort Liquordale)... so, I might as well play around with my guitar more... Right? It beats pining away on Skype or Facebook...

Still a bit under the weather... accidentally caught a few swigs from the captain's water (and he's been sick)-- he left it out RIGHT beside mine!! -- and I've been exhausted the past few days. I'm going to bed early tonight to try to beat this crap before it has a chance to take hold. Stupid germs...

2008-12-09T17:48:00.002-05:00

don't have much to report... just the same ole thing... I'm working hard to get the boat ready for Key West and the Bahamas, unsure of what I'll be facing as far as provisioning goes, especially in the islands...

We got a delivery of about 40 cases of drinks yesterday. It was MY job to figure out where I was going to stash it all until we need it... hehehe... I crammed them under beds.

Anyway, that's about all... as weird as this may sound, I'm really enjoying the quiet of this job. It's SO different from a 7th grade classroom... I don't "leave" work with a headache and wondering why in the WORLD I'm doing this... I enjoy organizing and inventorying and cleaning... I've been kicking some galley butt cooking for the guys, too! Tonight we had nachos, but I had to season the meat all by myself because we didn't have any taco seasoning... turned out pretty damn good! Last night, I baked pork loin and made a honey balsamic dipping sauce, sauteed fresh green beans, and baked potato chunks. On Friday night, I made pasta with sundried tomatoes and alfredo sauce... It all sounds a lot more complicated than it really was, but suffice to say I've been having a BLAST in the galley!

So, I'll be taking off within the next few weeks... leaving American waters, and heading south for the blue seas of the Bahamas. I've made Victor promise to take me snorkeling, and maybe I can get my SCUBA certification while I'm down there? Who knows what will happen...

Being sick really sucks...

2008-12-07T18:20:00.002-05:00

okay, so I'm coming back down with something that seems suspiciously like the strep I had back in October. NOT COOL!!! my throat has been getting progressively worse the past four days, i've had a steady headache for two days, and all I want to do is sleep... which i've done all weekend. i've only been upstairs a couple times -- long enough to get some food and make a mug of tea. the boss comes on in a week, and i still have a TON of stuff to do to get ready for my first trip on the boat. I guess tomorrow morning I'll be going to the clinic again to get a strep test and some antibiotics. fun.

in other news, chris, who came back from the bahamas this past week, left again on saturday. it killed me to have to say goodbye to him again... but, such is the life we have chosen for ourselves, right? the trouble is that there is so much left unknown... about when we'll see each other again, what the next several months have in store for us... and if our feelings for each other can withstand space and time. I was thinking about all that in one of my sleepy stupors this weekend... and it kinna reminded me of those old war stories where the star-crossed lovers must say good-bye for no telling how long... it takes a LOT of faith to hang on to something like that. People change. Time diminishes one's love for another... we conjure up a fantasy about what the relationship "was"... and then reality sets in.

the new job...!!

2008-12-01T22:46:00.002-05:00

okay, so i'm sitting on my new bunk, in my new closet... er... cabin... on my new boat. Honestly, I wasn't very thrilled about this gig because the itinerary seems pretty boring -- Caribbean in the winter and Milwaukie in the summer. What in the WORLD is there to do in MILWAUKIE?! But, since i've been on the boat for a few days, i'm beginning to like this place. I'm the only stew on board, so i get to make things the way I want them! YES!!!

Today, I started off with a full overview of the boat--looking in all the nooks and crannies, opening cabinets and drawers, and making a list of everything I could think of that needed to be done. The problem with jobs like this is that once ONE job is complete, TEN MORE add to the list. By the end of the day, I had done a linen inventory, liquor inventory, table decoration inventory, candle and glass decor inventory, cleaning supply inventory, and guest toiletries inventory. Doesn't that sound EXCITING?!

Tomorrow, i'll be tackling the VIP stateroom -- cleaning, organizing, pressing all the linens, and figuring out what all is stored under that bed. I imagine i'll also spend some time talking to the captain about my job, expectations, and those other details. Eventually, I'll be detailing each of the rooms, bringing them all to my standards, and buying a TON of supplies.

Current itinerary is this: Leave on Dec. 14th for an owner trip to Key West. From there, leave on Dec 20th for Bahamas and stay in the Caribbean for two months. WAHOO!!! We'll see what happens though...

Spent last week on the island paradise of Cumberland Island with the fam and my second family -- the Rusch's... it was pretty much AWESOME... my legs are eaten up with sand flea bites, my nose is crusty because it ran like a faucet all week, and I still have a smoke-inhalation cough that won't give, but I would give anything to be back there again with everyone--even my complaining sister... LOVE YOU, HL!!

Sorry to cut this short... it's getting late, and I need sleep to get me through the busy day tomorrow. A woman's work is NEVER done!!

My red high heels...

2008-11-19T21:54:00.002-05:00

Okay, so the past 48 hours have been somewhat hectic. I flew back to Atlanta yesterday, Daddy picked me up, and dropped me off with Mommy in Woodstock. I had been on the phone with the other captain from the boat in New York... Mommy and I had a marathon shopping spree at two thrift stores and Ross to get some decent clothes for my interviews up here. So, in short, I was up at 7 a.m. and didn't get home until after 9:30 p.m.. But, my night was nowhere NEAR over. After I brought all my purchases and luggage inside, I had a TON of laundry, packing, outfits to put together... I didn't stop moving... RUNNING... until almost 3 a.m. My flight left at 8, so I had to be up and out by 5.

My flight was smooth sailing... the plane was almost empty, so I was able to stretch out across my own row. I couldn't sleep because I was jazzed out on coffee. Once we landed, I ducked into the bathroom to put on my tights (which are the DEVIL!), saucy red heels, and make-up. Blair, the mate, and Bobby, the engineer, picked me up at 11 and we drove the 20 minutes to the boat. the BEAUTIFUL boat. IT's only a year old, so it hasn't had time to get dirty. I hung out with the guys until 12:30 and we went to get lunch with Jon, the captain. I liked the boys immediately. We have similar senses of humor and I felt comfortable joking with them. Lunch was at a busy diner in Jersey City. The boss arrived on the boat at 3 to interview me, and we talked for at least an hour and a half before he and the captain took a "break" to talk about moving the boat. I met up with the boys in the galley where they told me I was doing great and that I had talked to Mr. longer today than they ever had.

After the Mr. came back from talking to Jon, we started the "real interview"... He asked me about my music, and he wanted to see my myspace page. The boys hooked the computer up to the television and we all listened to my music while I blushed. They seemed impressed. Mr. was a bit stand-offish. Later, I turned down the bed, looked at vinyl samples for new pillows on the sun deck. Jon wanted me to help them pick out the colors. He then asked me to look through the galley and assess what I would move around and change if I worked in there. I looked around, but honestly I was so wiped out that I couldn't think straight. Eventually, Mr. ordered dinner and Jon went to pick it up. Meanwhile, Mr. requested that I make him a "Manhattan Vivere", but there is no ice on the boat because the refrigeration is not working properly. Jon brought ice with the pizzas... yes, the first meal I served my potential boss was pizza. He requested that we heat the pizzas in a skillet with olive oil to make the crust crispy. My Manhattan Vivere needed more Vermouth, but Mr. was happy that it was well-chilled. He turned in by 9, and now I'm in the crew mess watching TV with Blair and Bobby. Jon lives in the city with his wife and 6 month old son, Sacha.

I'm WIPED out right now... Not sure what to expect for tomorrow, but I'll be up around 7 to get ready for the Mr. to wake up around 8. I won't be cooking breakfast, but I do need to have his cappuccino ready for him. My flight leaves for Atlanta at 1, so I'll have to be at the airport by noon. I imagine I'll have an opportunity to sit down with Jon and talk to him about the job.

Right now, I REALLY like the boat. The crew--the guys--rock. I would be organizing the boat how I like it, learning as I go, and getting some GREAT experience as a solo stew. I'll need to beef up my knowledge of table settings. I'd also like to contact my chief stew friends to get some info from them. These boys definitely need a woman's touch here. Apparently, the boat has only had temporary stews, so things have remained a bit touch and go. Their decor is basically knick-knacks that the owners have brought on board, and it doesn't really match. But that's cool. I'm all about surrounding myself with things I love, so whatever makes them happy. Blair says that the Mr. loves to spend money, so this is a good sign.

What I loved EVEN more was that they guys REALLY DID help me out. Blair helped with serving the Mr. by getting out the flatware and placemat, heating the pizza, and helping with dishes. Jon walked me through the turn down and gave me pointers on how to make the Mr.'s drink. In short, this team REALLY DOES work together.

So, I'm waiting for the official invite. then it's decision time... New Moon or Vivere?

Jobs Jobs JOBS!!

2008-11-18T11:17:00.002-05:00

Okay,

So I'm sitting in the airport after an interview with the captain of New Moon. He gave me a tour of the boat and a run down of what they do on board. Basically, I would be cooking for the crew as the boss's wife prefers to cook when they are on board. (Unless they go out, of course!) Summers would be spent on the Great Lakes and winters spent between Fort Lauderdale and Bahamas. The itinerary seems rather boring, but one never knows. He would like a year commitment, but that is always subject to a 2-month trial period. They would provide full medical benefits, 401k matching... I would be one of usually three on board, but with a charter happening, there could be as many as five crew. Before I left, the captain offered me the job...

In addition to THAT, the captain of the 116' Azimut wants to fly me up to NYC tomorrow for a face-to-face interview. From the job description, it sounds like it might be more than I can handle, but the pay is MUCH better than New Moon. (I don't know about benefits, taxes, or anything like that, though...) I'm thinking about going for it anyway, getting a feel for the boat and then seeing how I feel tomorrow evening. I just don't want to miss out on Cumberland... I know a job is top priority, but I'm SOOO close to the trip, and I hate to have my big plans screwed up at the last minute.

SOOO, I have big decisions to make in the next few days, I just know it. Such is the life of a yachtie, and part of me just wishes I had ONE job possibility so that I couldn't look at the greener grass on the other side of the fence... Welcome to LIFE!

....leavin' on a jet plane...

2008-11-17T21:26:00.002-05:00

Okay, so I had a VERY nice chat with the owner and captain today. The captain just text messaged me and wants to fly me up for a face-to-face interview on Wednesday. Between flying home tomorrow and to NYC and back the next day, it seems I'll be spending a good bit of time in airports in the next few days... CRAZY!

As Murphy's Law would have it, just as I start making plans to QUIT sitting around the crew house, I get two more job leads. The second came as I was sitting in Smallwood's putting Keith's resume's in the notebook. A captain looked at me and asked if I was a stew, was I looking for a job, and could I cook? He was looking for a crew cook/stew for his 112' motor yacht. He's picking me up tomorrow to look at the boat and then take me to the airport--saving ME some money on a taxi! YESSS! The THIRD job lead came from an email from Crew Network about a 120' sailboat in San Diego needing a cook/stew. It's privately owned, family prefers simple meals, they would be going to Caribbean til April and then probably off to the Med for summer. With both of the jobs, they wouldn't need me to start until after Dec. 1st. So that wouldn't conflict with my recording with Kimmie or going to Cumberland with my family!

I'm REALLY excited about ANY of these possibilities simply because they would be SUCH great learning experiences. I believe the one in NYC would be more formal and a bit more work than I am ready for, but I am going to be honest with the captain and let him know what my stipulations are. That a professional chef would have to be hired for the charters and for longer trips with the family, a second stew would also be hired. I am willing to start out below $3500/month, but in three months, I would like a review for a raise. I called around to four of my crew agents and they ALL said that average salary is $3500, but one urged me to no for no less than $4000.

SO, the next couple days are going to be QUITE interesting... literally, I'll be living minute-by- minute. I'm still planning on going forward with the original plan of going to Charleston and Cumberland, but that all my change if I get a job offer. The most important thing is to get a job... Welcome (again) to the world of yachting...

the waiting game....

2008-11-17T14:00:00.002-05:00

Okay, so I'm waiting on a call from a captain and owner on a boat in NYC coming down here in the next little while. I'm being interviewed for a Cook/Stew position on a 116' Azimut (check them out! They're GORGEOUS!) The boat is called "Vivere" which is Italian for "Dare to Live"... they do lots of charity work and have family on board all the time. Sounds like a very relaxed boat with LOTS of work, but a potentially great atmosphere.

Keeping my fingers crossed...

"Courage is your greatest present need..."

2008-11-15T04:23:00.001-05:00

... so said my fortune cookie today. Funny how apropos that little line is. I am about to embark on a leap of faith like no other... that seems to be quite the trend with me lately.

I called my dad tonight to update him personally (none of this blogging business between father and daughter!) on all that has been going on -- how there is NO work down here, a talent scout found my music myspace page, and how Kimmie has offered to help me get some more tracks recorded in Charleston. (I swear, I need to pay this girl for all her help! One day I'll have the opportunity to repay her for her kindness.) Anyway, I told him all that, and he gave me the advice and boost I needed to book a flight home to pick up my car and head to Chucktown for a while... I'm still keeping the yachting option open, but I'm just wasting time here in Ft. Lauderdale. And REALLY, I had a bad feeling all along about returning down here. At one point, I had to take some Xanax to calm my hysterics (my mom can vouch for that one!!). So, I'm taking a detour to my favorite city ever, and I'm crossing my fingers that I can score some gigs to save up some money to work on yachts once again when the market bounces back. Keep your fingers crossed for me!

Going on a job hunt, a job hunt, a job hunt...

2008-11-10T12:33:00.002-05:00

Okay, so the hunt continues, and honestly I feel like a greyhound chasing after that elusive stuffed bunny... chances are slim that I'll be the lucky winner-- I'm neither the fastest, slimmest, nor in the right place at the right time. Needless to say, it's beginning to wear me down.

Chris leaves on Wednesday or Thursday and there is no telling if or when I'll ever see him again. Of course, we both want to keep in touch, but one never knows with this industry. I'm kicking myself that I didn't accept the position on his boat... of course, after the way the chief stew (who shall remain unnamed but you can find out if you look at my previous posts) spoke to me the other night, I'm glad I'm not trapped in a job with her for another six months.

I had a job interview on Thursday, but I got an email this morning saying that the chief stew hadn't selected me for a second interview. Fine. Sometimes I wonder what these people are really looking for... some cute prissy girl to look good in a uniform? or someone who is going to actually do a good job? someone not afraid of hard work, getting dirty, or messing up her hair? Granted, I'm not saying that the cute girls searching for jobs as stews can't do a good job, but when housemates admit that they don't know how to iron, leave their wet towel on my bed, and make comments like "I'm SO not domestic!" YET, they are still offered jobs at the drop of a hat, it really makes me wonder...

At any rate, I'm noticing my depression deepening into becoming more edgy with my housemates. I don't mean to be, but it's hard to stay positive when I'm literally down to my last few dollars and I'm having to call home for money.... and the bills continue to pile up. On Wednesday, I'm supposed to pay rent, and I honestly don't know how I'm going to pay for it. I might have enough money on my credit card, but it would cost half as much to take the Amtrak train up to Charleston and see about getting work up there. Of course, that could be a potentially fatal decision if jobs *suddenly* start pouring in. I'm to the point of tears right now... That's why I'm trying to stay to myself which usually means I'm curled in a fetal position on my bed either reading, staring into space, or sleeping.

There is a job fair today, and I'm fully intending on going (along with every OTHER crew member in the tri-city area!) I already know I'm just going to be another blurry face to the captain and crew agents represented there, but I've got to try. I'm armed with about 20 resumes and a handful of business cards, I've got my make-up on and my "crew-niform" ready to go... (a crew-niform is the standard white polo shirt and khaki or navy shorts) I don't know what is going to happen, and I'm TRYING to have a good attitude about this. But honestly, I'm so depressed that I'm exhausted and sick to my stomach. I don't even feel like playing my guitar any more. I just want to run away from it all...

On a lighter note, I was contacted by a talent scout about my music, and she wants to put me forward to have some music on an indie film's soundtrack. Here goes MORE rejection... (God! I hate to be so negative! But it isn't as disappointing as getting my hopes up and then having them let down.) Anyway, Kimmie wants me to come up to Charleston to record some music with her to post onto my website. I'd be working with a professional producer with REAL recording equipment in a studio. I honestly feel unworthy of this sort of treatment. Kimmie has always been SO encouraging and uplifting... she's always helped me and sacrificed her busy schedule for me.

Anyway, I've got to pull myself out of this funk. It's only a HORRIBLE vicious cycle that isn't going to get me anywhere but further down and away from what I've been looking for. I need a a job and sitting around the crew house isn't going to get me anywhere NEAR that goal.

2008-10-31T22:42:00.001-04:00

THEY'RE GONE! 20 minutes 'til eleven, and they finally get out of here! Now I can camp out on the couch in a quiet house... AHHHH!

2008-10-31T22:23:00.001-04:00

holy cow! they're STILL HERE!!! GO PARTY FOR GOD'S SAKE!!

Halloween 2008

2008-10-31T20:36:00.002-04:00

Okay.... so the crew house is hoppin' tonight as everyone (mostly the guys) gets dressed in their costumes... so far, we have two knights, a Spartan, Superman/Clark Kent, Saturday Night Fever, William Warren, a redneck sheriff, Risky Business, a witch, and a pirate... What am I going to be? A COUCH POTATO! I'm not leaving the house tonight since I'm so strapped for cash... I did have a couple costume ideas though... a Greek goddess, a bathing beauty... a shacker (a girl who goes home with a guy at the end of the night)...

It has been fun coming up with ideas for the guys... the girls of course already had their costumes. The boys went shopping for their costumes around 7:30 this evening, and those caught with nothing after Dollar Tree closed we stuck with whatever we had in the house which was *surprisingly* a lot! Simon provided Charlie with a suit so he could be Superman; Kelly made John's toga so he could be Leonidas; John lent Kelly a white dress shirt so she could be Tom Cruise in Risky Business... tonight truly was a team effort.

Everyone seems to be leaving -- FINALLY!! -- so I can carry on with my "costume" of the evening... a pathetic couch potato. I've got some ice cream in the freezer, raid the boys' beer stash (they'll never realize it's gone), watch Ghost Hunters Live -- a Halloween tradition since last year. Sounds depressing, I know, but it's not too bad. I don't have the money to blow on cab rides, cover charges, overpriced alcohol, and a 2 am Denny's run.

I had to call my mom to ask for money today. I've never done that before. I've always been the one to send HER money. It was hard to say the words, and I braced myself for a lecture, but I was surprised that she didn't seem to bat an eye. I promised her that I'd pay her back as soon as I had a job, and she assured me that it was no big deal. Still... I hate asking for help.

Daywork -- WHOOPEE!!!

2008-10-28T21:47:00.003-04:00

So, I've finished Day 2 of day work, and I must say... this girl PREFERS living the life of leisure, but enjoys having money to spend... on rent and shampoo... I'm sure my roommates are thankful that I'm not using their shampoo, too.

We're preparing for the boat show that starts on Thursday... today things got rather stressed as fixtures continued to be left unfixed, the "to do" list continued to grow, and more things seemed to break. We leave tomorrow morning for our spot at the boat show, and I imagine it's going to be even MORE stressed as we work until the wee hours of the morning making everything PERFECT...

At the moment, I'm chilling with Melissa for a RARE evening in front of the television. It's FREEZING outside... well, 52 degrees. Weather.com projects that the high tomorrow will be 70 but back in the 80s by Monday... Whew! I was worried I might not be able to wear flip-flops.

In other news, I'm recovering from the strep quite nicely. I have another three days of meds before I'm DONE, but I don't feel sick at all. THANK GOD!

Still on the job hunt... turns out Sacajawea hired another stew who had been working on the boat for a while. No problem. The chief stew said she'd be glad to be a reference for me saying I'm a hard worker and I'm trustworthy to complete tasks well. I hope everything works out for me...

Until another day...

Starting to feel better...

2008-10-24T14:49:00.003-04:00

I don't think I've ever felt THIS much better after taking medicine, but in only a few days, I'm feeling TONS better... of course, my head still aches a bit and my sore throat comes and goes...

More later.

Learning and living...

2008-10-23T12:16:00.003-04:00

My purse looks like I raided a pharmacy, and in a way I did. Currently, I have sinus meds, cough drops, throat spray, ibuprofen, two kinds of acetaminophen, penicillin, and rolaids. Yes, folks, you guessed it. I'm one sick puppy... Went to the clinic yesterday and for the first time in my 20-something years, I have acquired STREP THROAT!

It all started on Monday when I woke up with throat and ear pain. Went to the clinic and the nurse said it was probably sinus-related, to get some meds that would dry out the fluids, and I'd be okay. Monday night, I started feeling better, went to Chris's house. Fell asleep over there, and woke up Tuesday morning with body aches and chills so bad that I wanted to die. I had on sweat pants, long-sleeve shirt, two comforters, and a blanket and I still had chills. Chris said he could feel the heat off my back through my shirt and without even touching me. Needless to say, I didn't move from his couch that day, and he stayed home with me that morning... picked up some juice and medicine for me. Eventually, my fever broke, but my throat still hurt like hell.

Woke up Wednesday morning and decided that I needed to do something about this, so I went back to the clinic. The five-minute strep test came back a glaring positive (I was glad that I wouldn't have to wait for some antibiotics!). So, I've been hanging out in bed all day and all night... bored to tears and itching to do something. My body is bursting with energy, but my head feels like a 50-pound medicine ball. I need to walk up to CVS to get myself a new toothbrush... forgot to pick one up yesterday when I was there.

So, what have I learned from all of this? First of all, don't get sick. But in the case of the inevitable, always have someone who will help you when you DO get sick... fortunately, I had Chris. I'm sure I could have found others who would have helped me, but I always hate to ask. Third, know where you can go to get help... meaning, I had access to the minute clinic at CVS... didn't need insurance, and it saved me a LOT of money I would have spent on a doctor visit. I'm sure there are other things I've learned from this experience, but I haven't realized them yet... I'm just glad I'm on meds. And I'm thankful that my mom knows so much about stuff like tylenol and advil and how much to take and when...

In other news, the job leads continue to come at me. Not complaining, but they all seem SO great! It's hard to decide which one to pursue. So far, nothing concrete has really panned out, but I think the job on Sacajawea is pretty promising. I was supposed to start working on the boat on Monday, and then I came down with THIS, but the chief stew has been wonderful and understanding.

At any rate, I'm starting to feel like my old self again, except for a throat that feels gravelly and looks like raw ground beef... and a head that pound any time I move too quickly. I should feel MUCH better tomorrow, and by Monday, I'll be on Sacajawea scoring myself a J-O-B!

Exhausted but Happy

2008-10-19T16:04:00.002-04:00

I don't really know how to start this off, but I figured I hadn't written in a few days, so I was due. This weekend was another great one spent with Chris. He's still fighting his cold, and I think I'm starting to get it myself... I'm getting a scratchy throat and a cough here and there. Of course, it could be related to all the smoking I've been around since I've gotten down here... Yuck.

Anyway, I spent the entire day at the beach yesterday. Chris and I went to John Lloyd State Park (the same beach we went to last week) with Mark, Boysie, Carrie, and Jane (our friend from New Zealand). Mark, Chris, and Jane went diving for lobsters while Boysie, Carrie, and I hit the bar and beach... they dove for around two hours! And, for their efforts, they brought back one lobster, some great stories, and a bit more knowledge on how best to catch the little buggers.

This morning, Chris and I had the lobster in an omelet -- YUM!

I've been doing a little more writing lately... some poetry and narratives... just some private things that I don't intend to show many if anyone... I'm glad that the creative juices are flowing again... Chris and I were talking about it last night, and I thought of a few things I could write about -- silly things like drinking with the guys, time spent with Chris...

OH! Friday night, I met up with the boys (Chris, Tim, and Boysie) at The Well. The boys had been there for a few hours, so they were buzzing pretty well, and Tim pulled me aside and told me that if I didn't try out for American Idol, he'd never talk to me again. Funny man. He even offered to pay for voice lessons to improve my vocals! But he said I didn't need to waste my "talent"... whatever that may be. Honestly, I play guitar and sing because I love it... I love the songs I sing, and that in turn gives me the passion and drive to sing well. I wonder sometimes if I could sing even if I wasn't "feeling" it...

Anyway, I'm at Chris's house hiding out in his room... the guys are watching the Indie car race, the sky is grey and cloudy, and I'm chillin with Blossom Dearie and Lena Horne... I think I might pick up my guitar and crank out some tunes out by the pool. Trouble is, I don't have my music with me and I can never remember the chords! Some rocker I'll be if I have to have a music stand on stage with me!! Tehehe...

Fort Lauderdale is PARTY TOWN!

2008-10-16T09:38:00.002-04:00

Went to the Triton party last night... It was more like the Triton crowd! Not only was the saloon jam-packed, but the city block in front of and around the bar swarmed with yachties. UNREAL! Despite the masses, I did find some friends -- Molly and Georgia, Danielle, Melissa, Jane, Linda (one of my agents), and a couple guys from my STCW class. Ended up giving my free drink away to Shelton... I just can't seem to hold my liquor these days. BUT, the food was good. Black beans, plantains, chicken wings... YE-HAW!

After about an hour of "networking" (more like standing around trying to look cool while talking to people I already know and see every day), I took a cab back home. What doesn't make sense to me is how ironic this function was. The *purpose* of this party was to mix and mingle with others on boats... to score jobs, right? Well, what REALLY happened was people getting pissed out of their minds, girls showing up like they were trying to score a roll in the hay... but, maybe that's their idea of a job? I don't know if I would want to hire someone who showed up to a networking party dressed like a call girl... yes, they want to have fun and show off their bodies, but I would also expect them to bring some respect and propriety to the boat they work on.

What do you think?

Giddy-Yap!

2008-10-15T14:00:00.002-04:00

I had an interview this morning... went pretty well. The chief stew found my resume at Smallwood's and called me yesterday while I was at Chris's house. Turns out the captain was born in the same hospital I was born in, still lives in Georgia (when he's not on the boat), has friends at my alma mater, knows Sid Brown (my dad's old boss!), and has a nephew in the same school district where I used to teach... WEIRD! Or should I say, SMALL WORLD?!

Anyway, the boat is 132' and is a pretty serious charter machine... they are booked solid until February, and are hoping to get about ten more charters booked through until May. The hard work doesn't scare me... and the money I'll be saving is GREAT! (No, MOM! Just because I'm not spending the money doesn't mean YOU can!!!! But I will help you out with those tires on my car anyway...)

I've also been emailing a lady who responded to an ad I placed in the Triton. She said she may have a lead for me... turns out she's a travel writer, and she wants to meet me at the Triton networking party tonight. The theme is "Cowboys and Indians" and a saloon in Ft. Lauderdale is hosting it... I'll be looking more like a hillbilly than a cowgirl because I'm too cheap to invest in a pair of boots (they're SO not packable!), but maybe the plaid shirt I'm stealing from Chris and my braids and bandana will be convincing enough. If not, I can always show a little cleavage. Tehehe... Just KIDDING, DADDY!!

I'm off to Burger King with Trina and Carrie... no, I've already had my salad, so I'm just going for the exercise... More to come.

there is hope in the universe...

2008-10-14T18:42:00.002-04:00

Started off the morning with a bike ride half-way to "marina mile" to do some dock walking with Carrie before I realized that I wouldn't be able to get into the shipyards. Besides that my tootie was wailing in pain, my bike had no breaks, and the tire was going flat... So, I turned around.

On the way back to my crew house, I stopped into the Crew Unlimited office to see about a couple jobs I was interested in. Got some more information, but nothing super exciting. Once Carrie came home -- she was following up on a job lead at one of the shipyards -- she said that she stopped by Roscioli to see the Aquasition crew. Chris was still sick. She threw together some AWESOME soup -- onions, garlic, thyme, sage, lemon, chicken stock, veggie bullion, and rice noodles -- and we took it over to the sick boy. I was a little jealous that I couldn't cook like that. One day, maybe.

Anyway, we piled in on Chris whether he wanted us to or not. I think he was happy for the company. I pestered him to drink lots of fluids, he complied to a certain extent. We watched Zohan (silly movie... not one I'd see again) and all crashed for a little while. By 4:30 the crew tumbled in. Carrie and I lingered for a while longer, but nothing was happening, so we said our farewells.

While I was over there, I did get a call about a job on a 130' yacht going to the Caribbean. The atmosphere sounds great, and I'm looking forward to the interview tomorrow. If the interview goes well, I'll be asked to work with them getting the boat ready for the boat show and then perhaps to stay on for the charter season! YES!!

Now, I'm sitting in the crew house while the guys grill outside, listening to a little Van Morrison, and just hanging with the peeps... I have an interview tomorrow, DESPERATELY need to do some laundry, and I can't seem to get full... I raided Chris's fridge eating some of Carrie's soup, chips and salsa, a ham sandwich... then I got home and ate a couple pieces of chocolate, four slices of cheese... and I'm still hungry. I need something starchy... like a doughnut or something. BUT, if I eat that all the exercise I've been getting biking and walking everywhere will be for NOTHING... oh, but a hot glazed doughnut would be SO scrumptious right now.

Okay... going to Dunkin' Drug-Laced Doughnuts up the street... I'll take a dozen to Chris... maybe that will make him feel better... I'll stop by the gas station and pick up some orange juice.. and maybe I'll bring my guitar to serenade him with my healing voice.

Crew House Blues

2008-10-13T13:25:00.003-04:00

Okay, some call it a case of the Mondays, I call it the crew house blues... Spent a wonderful weekend with Chris, and now I'm stuck here in the house laying on a squeaky, bowed bed with no job and cramps. I still have a *little* bit of money, but that's draining fast as I still have to pay for lodging and food (living off salad and yogurt at the moment), and my car payment, and credit card payment... I know once I get a job -- even a couple days of day work -- things will look better, and I could get something ANY day now... I've had a couple leads already, but nothing super convincing... I swear, the suspense is KILLING me.

It seems like most ads are looking for someone "fit" or "athletic"... hmmm... that doesn't exactly describe me. (as I reach for another Dove dark chocolate... it's medicine for my cramps, I PROMISE!) I have been trying to live healthy while I'm back down here... I don't drink NEARLY as much as I used to. In fact, this weekend, I didn't have ANYTHING to drink until last night. And even then it was light beer. And, I've been eating mostly salads and whole foods... cutting back on the processed and starchy junk foods. Except for the "groceries" Chris bought at Blockbuster the other night when we rented some movies. That night, the four food groups became salty, sweet, chocolate, and carbonated. I would exercise more, but it's SO damn hot. I AM walking almost everywhere I go... walked to CVS today... and I've been swimming a couple times this weekend -- at the crew house pool and at the beach yesterday. But, like I said, it's SO DAMN hot, and everywhere there is to walk to requires MONEY... if there was a park or something nearby, I might be more willing to trek to it. Of course, there is the beach, but it's about 5 miles away, and I'd DIE before I made it there. Maybe I can score a bike one day and ride there... and maybe take the bus back?

Anyway, enough of the blues. Let's talk about some happy stuff... This weekend was AWESOME! Yes, I spent the entire time with Chris, and yes, I think we *are* a thing, even though I don't think he is ready to admit it... At any rate, we are both having fun with each other, and that's all that matters, right? Friday night, we went to the Village Well... well, I actually RAN INTO him at the well -- another story full of drama and intrigue... and we hung out with the Aquasition crew. FUN! First Mate Mark said we were all going out on the tender to SCUBA dive. I got ALL excited, but Mark never showed or called, so Chris and I spent the day hanging out on the boat... watching TV. Nice and low-key. He wasn't feeling very well, so I made him take some Day-Quil and drink lots of water... That night we went out for Chinese and he got some Thera-flu.

Sunday morning, he was feeling MUCH better, but still having never heard from Mark, we went to the beach to dive off the coast. Well, we EVENTUALLY made it to the beach.... after getting some breakfast, then going to the dive shop for some lobster-catching gear, and then the gas station for a cooler and water. By 1:30, we made it to the beach. It then took a good 45 minutes for Chris to get all the gear assembled and ON... and he didn't even dive for more than 30 minutes. The surf was SO rough that it kept pushing us back toward shore, and the water was SO murky that we couldn't see much -- let alone catch any lobsters for dinner. Next time, though.

Even though I didn't see much wildlife underwater, I did see some above water. As I crossed the footbridge from the beach on a trip back to Chris's truck, I came upon a raccoon crossing the bridge himself. Once he saw me, he felt trapped, unsure of which way to go. So, he climbed upon the ledge, latched onto a post, and kept his wide-eyed gaze on me until I was out of sight. He was SOOO cute! I wished I had a camera to capture such a precious picture!

Last night, after we were fully toasted from the sun (actually, I was more toasted than Chris, who is part Native American and can handle the sun better than my Anglo-German heritage), we went back to his crew house and grilled hot dogs. I swam a bit and allowed the cool pool water to cool my toasty chest and back... what kills me is that my arms got quite a bit of sun yesterday, but it seems the sun refused to touch my hands. It looks like I was wearing gloves! Weird.

I raided Chris's CD collection and uploaded a bit of music onto my computer... some Blossom Dearie, Ben Harper, Iron and Wine, and Lena Horne... Oh, and I saw some GREAT movies this weekend... if you're in the mood for some uncouth comedy, check out Daniel Tosh's Completely Serious... it's raucous and oh so wrong... for some historical drama, see The Other Boleyn Girl. Both Natalie Portman and Scarlet Johannsen do a FANTASTIC job in the film and it gives some interesting perspective on that time in history. For a comedy-drama, I recommend The Love Song for Bobby Long. It features John Travolta and Scarlet Johannsen... (must have been a Scarlet weekend)... I'd never heard of it until Chris told me about it, but it's become one of my faves. It's a quiet film highlighting the romance of the South -- even today -- and finding family in the most unexpected places. It's funny, poignant, and wise...

Okay, so my chocolate meds haven't begun to kick in, and I have nothing to do, so I'm going to lay down for a few minutes... I hope to have something exciting to report VERY soon... Say a prayer for me.

Back on the Job Hunt...

2008-10-10T18:56:00.003-04:00

Spent the day pounding the pavement with Carrie. We visited all the crew agencies -- Crew Network, Crew Unlimited, IYT, Luxury Yacht Group -- and sweated like whores in church... But it felt like a productive day. By noon, we were drenched and ready for something cool, so we ate a quick bite and went to the Aquasition crew house's pool!

That was exactly what we needed, so after about an hour and a half there, we trekked the three blocks back to our house and showered off. I've been perched on my bed ever since -- updating my CV, re-checking agency sites, reading all the yachtie magazines I picked up this morning.

Carrie is at a Bar-B-Q at a friend's house, Chris is out drinking with Aquasition crew, and I'm here at the crewhouse listening to the nine boys I live with ramble around in the kitchen... Yes, you read that correctly... I live with NINE guys and three girls... so in TOTAL, there are 13 people living in the house. Life around here is rocking, to say the least. I just hope I rock some work pretty soon... I hate not really having much to do.

So, Carrie and I had talked about going to the beach tomorrow. We'll probably make Chris drive us since he has a truck... more than I can say for either Carrie or myself. Of course, it would probably be better FOR us to ride bikes there, but it would also be MUCH MORE DANGEROUS!

Ugh... so I want to go out and be social, but I'm kinna feeling blah and nobody is around. I guess I'll take a nap.

Flying South for the Winter...

2008-10-09T17:21:00.002-04:00

Well, I arrived yesterday, and honestly it was a comfort to be back in Fort Lauderdale. I'm currently sitting in the crew house with bad rap blaring out of the stereo, some cheesy game show on TV and people EVERYWHERE. Yep, I HAVE ARRIVED!

Once we got in, Chris and I met up with Mark, Boysie, and Tim at the Well. We had some drinks and caught up. I didn't realize how much I MISSED those boys! It's too bad I won't be joining them on charter this season. I'll be sad when we have to part.

Chris simply didn't want to go back to work yet, so we hung out at the beach today -- despite the fact that it was cloudy and rather gloomy. As a result, the beach was relatively deserted and calm... Niiiiice!

We ate lunch at Bubba Gump and talked a lot about education -- a topic that I'm rather passionate about given my previous vocation. I worried that I would bore Chris to death with my ranting, but he kept up nicely. Not that I didn't think he COULD... it's just that sometimes what I'm passionate about seems to be rather boring to others. Apparently not so with Chris. Good.

So, I'm staying in tonight... I'm rather tired after all the excitement of the past few days. Tomorrow starts the job search - HOT N' HEAVY, BABY! I'll be making my rounds to the crew agencies, putting my face in their heads, lobbying for a J-O-B! It seems that most of the people in this house have jobs or are finding some day work. Maybe I'll get lucky.

Another important issue on my to-do list is finding a costume for Halloween. Yes, it's 3 weeks away, but STILL! The past two years I've been the same thing, a gypsy, and I pull it off well. But, this year I'm thinking of something a little different... I'd like to utilize my hair maybe be an 80s rocker or something? Of course, the guys' eyes perked up when I tried on Boysie's glasses last night. Tehehe. Maybe I'll be a librarian or teacher or something? I'll make my decision once I get to a thrift store and see what's available.

I think I'm gonna take a bit of a nap before things crank up tonight... of course, most people may not get crazy tonight since they have to work tomorrow... That's fine. I'm not really in the mood to party.

Back to reality...

2008-10-05T19:33:00.002-04:00

Hello there, Faithful Readers!

I'm BAAAAACK! So sorry I left you for several weeks, but my journey brought me to the doldrums of yachting -- vacation -- and there simply wasn't much to report. But, I'm afraid that I had to return to reality and work, so I'm back to reporting my daily grind.

Truthfully, I have not formally returned to Ft. Liquordale (as yachties so lovingly refer to it), but I will be come Tuesday. I was able to extend my stay a full two weeks longer than expected, and whether or not that was a smart career move on my part, it definitely brought with it a number of wonderful opportunities.

To start, this weekend my sister came home from UGA and I REALLY got a chance to spend some time with her -- more than when I visited her on campus and when she came home two weekends ago. We went to the football game Friday night, a dog show with Mommy on Saturday, and the mall today. We pieced together her Halloween costume that is top secret, but is REALLY cute and had some great laughs. Our honorary sister, our cousin Brooke, spent the night with us last night and we sat on the bed together IM-ing each other silly movie quotes and yearbooking ourselves. We're nerds, I know, but I SO miss those days of being silly with my girls. We reminisced about the past, talked about what life was like now, and looked forward to the day we could all be together again. I'm going to miss them so much in the coming months... but, if you think about it, April isn't THAT far away... six months? Twenty-four weeks? 168 days? BAH! Pocket change in the grand scheme of things.... Sheah... I'll keep telling myself that.

Staying longer also enabled me to meet up with Chris, so we could take that fly-fishing trip that he promised. He picked me up on his way to his granny's house last Thursday and brought me back, albeit reluctantly, on Sunday night. It was probably the BEST weekend I'd had in a LONG time, and I wish days like those weren't so far apart. Even BETTER, I caught a wild trout. It was less than half a pound and was shorter than some sardines I've seen, but nevertheless, I CAUGHT IT! Here are some pics for your viewing pleasure...

My Big Catch!

From Explore. Dream. Discover.

Casting the Fly... And Hoping I Didn't Pierce my Lip in the Process!

whattya think about my outfit? Pretty FLY, huh? (Pun intended...)

From Explore. Dream. Discover.

Me and my Instructor... He's such a great teacher!

From Explore. Dream. Discover.

So I leave for Florida with Chris on Tuesday morning with mixed emotions. Again, I have to leave my family and friends and PERCY! But, I'm ready to get back to work making money and stashing it away. I'm eager to see what the next leg of my journey has in store for me... the Caribbean? or some place more distant and exotic? Wherever I go, you have my WORD that I will keep you all informed. So many of you have told me what fun you've had living vicariously through my adventures. I truly wish you could all be along for the ride -- the glamourous and not-so-glamourous parts -- because I'm sure we'd have PLENTY to talk about. But, I am so grateful to have such supportive family and friends who pester me to death about keeping them informed. :-) You are wonderful and I would feel so unloved without you.

I'm a baaaaaad blogger...

2008-09-30T12:10:00.003-04:00

Okay, so in an attempt to get me back to blogging, my good friend Christy has "tagged" me... here goes nuthin...

Here’s the rules for those I’m tagging. Check the list after my 6 THINGS to see if you’re it then

1. Link to the person who tagged you.

2. Post the rules on your blog.

3. Write six random things about yourself.

4. Tag sixish people at the end of your post.

5. Let each person know he or she has been tagged.

6. Let the tagger know when your entry is up.

Now for Six Random things about me:

1. I attended all three midnight showings of the Lord of the Rings films.

2. Every time I drive through Atlanta, I get lost.

3. I love fresh cut flowers, especially garden roses, calla lilies, and gerber daisies.

4. I'm a dancing MACHINE!! I've taken ballroom and belly dance classes in the past few years, and I'm always looking for someone to dance along with me!

5. My mom has five dogs and a cat, and EACH one has their own voice to match their unique personalities, given so generously by me... my mom says I missed my calling as a voiceover artist.

6. I used to make ceramics in high school and I love to quilt.

So there you have it, folks... it may not be very creatively put, but it's some randomness about me. AND, I'll have more blogs coming soon... I promise.

Home Sweet Home...

2008-09-03T19:32:00.003-04:00

It's been a couple days since I've been home, and it's been nice... Monday, I went to Button's house for dinner and laughs... it was good to be around old friends again.

Yesterday, Mommy and I kept the roads hot getting some much needed banking done. I put her on my accounts and opened an account at Bank of America... we went to the thrift store where I found some books on investing... and then we had a dog training session where Percy made me proud by remembering everything he and Mommy had worked on.

This weekend, I'm planning on a jaunt to UGA to see the stister (yes, it IS spelled correctly) and be a college student for another weekend. We're both thrilled to see each other...

Bad news on the job front: the job I thought I had in the bag has been withdrawn... Apparently my desire to think about the job (which wasn't going to be available until mid-October) didn't sit well with the powers that be, and the job offer was taken back. That's fine. It obviously wasn't meant to be. In the end, I think this is all for the best, but I do admit I will miss the guys.

Gotta go... watching the Republican National Convention...

Coming Home

2008-08-31T23:07:00.002-04:00

We pulled into Ft. Lauderdale (or Liquordale as the boys call it!) on Tuesday evening... from there, I pulled a busy couple days getting the boat set up for the shipyard -- bagging linens, inventorying dish ware, stowing decorations... In the evenings, I was able to cut loose with the rest of the crew... On Tuesday evening, Carrie and I headed to the crew house to pick up my beloved car! She was safe and sound, albeit a little dirty, and waiting patiently for my return. Then we hiked over to Waxy's for some drinks. Molly and Georgia met us there where I met some of the new house mates -- Tac, Phil, and Mark have all gone their separate ways to Bahamas, France, and Alaska, respectively. Chris, Mark, and Boysie joined us at Waxy's where we finished off the evening and dragged ourselves back to the boat.

Wednesday evening, I stayed in because I was SOOO tired. Everyone went out and brought me pizza back. The sweethearts!

Thursday evening, we stayed on the boat drinking leftover beer from the charter -- and believe me, there was PLENTY of it! At one point, Mark pulled out a water gun and started randomly shooting us. Boysie got in on the action and brought out the super-soaking-torpedo gun and proceeded to drench me from shoulders to shins... I was wearing a white tank top, too. NIIIIICE. I retaliated by getting my OWN torpedo gun filled with water from the ice chest and dousing Boysie. Everyone had a nice laugh at our expense. I then pulled out my guitar for an impromptu concert on the deck. Boysie wanted to know why I was working on boats with a voice like mine. I told him he was drunk, but he then informed me that he was friends with David Bowie and some other musicians... Don't know what that was all about, but at one point, he proposed to me saying that he'd still mean it once he sobered up.

Friday, Chris and I left for Jacksonville -- I offered to take him to his mom's so he could help her pack for her move to Boston and so he could pick up his truck. We hit a TON of traffic around Palm Beach and only made it to Vero Beach before we were whooped. Neither of us had been to the small coastal town, but we both thought it was a VERY nice place to vacation -- mostly residential and quiet, even for a Friday night! I must be getting old when I prefer the night life to be quiet!

We took advantage of the opportunity to sleep late, and only emerged our rooms when we were called by the front desk reminding us of the 11 am check out! Hehehe... From there we took A1A up the coast, enjoying the scenery and the crazy mailboxes! We rolled into Jacksonville around 6 because we stopped for lunch and shopping in Cocoa Beach. Chris's mom insisted that I spend the night because there was no way I'd make it all the way home that evening. Always one to buckle under peer pressure, I relented and agreed. She's a very sweet woman. We went out for sushi and grocery shopping -- she was provisioning for about ten people to come in from Louisiana running away from Gustave...

This morning, I left around 10 and made it home at 5... the closer I came, the heavier my foot was!!! And, let me TELL you! It feels GREAT to be back. The first thing I did was hug and kiss Percy... It was SO good to see him again. He's a bit shy of me -- pretty mad for leaving him like this -- but he's laying right here on the bed with me. I already have plans to meet up with Jenn for lunch and then Button for dinner. Tuesday, I have a dog training session, Friday I leave for Athens to spend the night with Hannah-Leigh... I'm thinking I need to invest in a planner to keep all my plans straight!!

So, tonight, I am back at home, and it's weird... I've been gone for almost three months and so much has changed, yet it's still very much the same. It makes me smile to know that no matter how far away I may roam, there is still a place on this earth that will welcome me with open arms and a hot meal and a comfortable bed.

Back in God's Country...

2008-08-25T23:19:00.003-04:00

WE'VE MADE IT TO FLORIDA!!! We still have 17 hours to go, but we are in Floridian waters... Stepped outside tonight to get a breath of fresh air, and it even smelled different! Like sulfur and fish...

The time is 11 pm, and I'm on watch (again) with Mark... He's told me at least five times how excited he is to get back home... five times THIS watch... about thirty times every watch previous... Of course, he hasn't really been home in six months...

When I was outside a few minutes ago, I took a look at the stars... Keith wasn't lying when he said that the middle of the ocean is the best place to stargaze. No city lights, no trees... the sky extends from one horizon to the next... The only light was the pesky light on the boat that Mark refused to turn off even for a few minutes -- despite the fact that there are NO other vessels around.

"Why would it be a bad idea to turn off your light in Florida waters?" he asked me.

"Because the Coast Guard might think you're doing something illegal?"

"Bingo." And that was that...

But even with the light, I can still see the stars like I've never seen them before. I swear, I saw the arms of the Milky Way and the stars sprinkled and scattered through the firmament. I guess that's what the psalmist saw on those lonely nights out in the desert when he penned, "The heavens declare the glory of God..." Scenes like those make me feel small and puny in comparison to the grand scheme of Creation and life in general. And yet, when I see those sights, my heart swells with pride and joy to know that MY GOD is in control of the very same stars I'm admiring.

A disturbing realization has been creeping upon me the past few weeks... Those around me -- the crew I work with -- doesn't seem thrilled about these things we've been seeing... Yesterday, when the dolphins came, tonight with the stars, and even last night with the sunset I seemed like the only person who really enjoyed the moments... I know they've seen some of the most beautiful places in the world, but I pray that no matter HOW many sunsets, starry nights, or dolphins I see I will NEVER get used to those moments when God comes near enough to whisper to us.

Dolphin Watch 2008

2008-08-24T17:42:00.002-04:00

Okay, so I'm on watch with Mark right now, and we just saw DOLPHINS!!!! They swam under the bow for several seconds before lagging behind and playing in the wake... they seemed close enough to touch! I could see lacerations and spots on their backs... and there were several BABIES!!! What do you call a baby dolphin? A pup? Anyway, I'm not having so much trouble staying awake on this watch... it's sunny and I've slept about 36 of the past 48 hours... there's not much else to do when you're underway... if I try to focus on anything for very long, I get lightheaded.

The good news is we are making GREAT time.... We left NYC at 10 am yesterday and now, 32 hours later, we're already at Cape Lookout, North Carolina. Phil has slowed us down a couple times, but I think we're getting caught in a current because we keep speeding up! Hehehe.... It would be great if we could get into the shipyard early, but we aren't supposed to be there until Tuesday afternoon. I'm hoping Phil will agree to anchor out for a few hours so we can swim... wouldn't that be a BLAST? OH! and the water is absolutely GORGEOUS! It's a deep, midnight blue... and SO calm. We are about 20 miles off the coast, and I can't see the shoreline. I kinna feel like I'm Noah -- stranded on an ocean covered earth...

I'm a zombie.

2008-08-24T11:08:00.003-04:00

All I've done the past 24 hours is eat, sleep, and be on watch. Mostly sleep... it's a weird feeling... everyone has a weird schedule, so the only time we're together is when we are switching posts in the bridge. And, it's HARD to stay awake during watch -- especially at night. All the screens are darkened, the waves are methodically rocking the boat... we have to keep the music down so we don't disturb Phil in his bunk next door... And caffeine doesn't help at ALL. I drank an entire diet coke, and I still nodded off the entire time. Mark kept himself busy with all the monitors and log books, and my job was to keep MARK awake... hehehe.

The water hasn't been TOO rough, but I've been downing the ginger tablets to keep my stomach from acting up. However, it has been too rough for me to get a shower, and I NEED A SHOWER!!!! SHEW-EE!!!

Can't type any more... it's hard to concentrate on anything with the boat going every which way... maybe I'll try to bathe my stinky body...

New York, New York

2008-08-22T20:21:00.000-04:00

Okay, so my big day in NYC is over, and we are underway again -- this time for a 75 hour journey to Ft. Lauderdale.

We arrived in New York on Thursday evening... after docking and making drinks for everyone, I headed out with Chris's sister, Carrie, and Shelton. We wanted to go to SoHo for a shopping excursion, but we ended up in Greenwich Village -- home of more smoke shops than I've ever seen in my LIFE! Anyway, we found a coffee house that sold bubble tea, and we purchased the BEST bubble tea I've EVER had... YUM! After that, we ventured around the area, checking out the shops and local street life. Interesting... Around ten o'clock, we met up with Chris and Mark at a really great Italian restaurant called Lupe. Of course, Chris, the gracious host, insisted on paying for everyone's meal -- that included several bottles of EXPENSIVE Italian wine.

Friday morning, we -- Carrie, Shelton, Mark, his dad, and I -- set off early to see some sights. We first hiked to the subway, and after a helluva time trying to figure out which train to take, made it to CENTRAL PARK!!! What a BEAUTIFUL place! Our first destination, though, was snacks because the boys were hungry. They bought some famous New York hot dogs that were nothing more than what my mom makes at home. We weren't impressed.

After food, we went to the Museum of Natural History. WHAT a HUGE place! I didn't even get a chance to explore half of the exhibits! What I did explore was incredible, though. I mainly stayed in the African and South American exhibits. What fascinates me more than anything were the relics they had on display. I saw massive stone carvings from Incan and Mayan ruins, delicate gold jewelry from Egypt, and intricately woven headdresses from the African plains. To think that these very pieces were fashioned by human hands hundreds and thousands of years ago, used in daily life, and preserved over space and time just baffles me. Aside from being beautiful, these pieces were also meaningful to the cultures they belonged to. It makes me wonder what sorts of "relics" historians a thousand years from now would put on display for current-day America. Cell phones, for sure... and McDonalds -- they could probably use actual left-overs found in car floor-boards... bombs and guns... designer handbags and clothes. That really says something about our priorities, eh?

After we finished in the museum, we walked through Central Park. We stumbled upon a small pond with couples rowing boats around... what a PERFECTly romantic setting! I could have watched that all day, but we snapped a couple pictures and moved on. We found another pathway that was gravel and lined with benches and trees. I couldn't help but read some of the plaques on the benches... some were heart warming, others heart breaking, but they each made me want to read another... We saw street performers -- guitarists, sax players, dancers, mimes... and the amusement park! Central Park was like its own little world within New York... a natural oasis from the concrete jungle.

For lunch, we went to Burger Heaven that was more like Burger HELL... We got Reubens that were nasty, the glasses were cloudy, and the waitress didn't know what a smile was. Needless to say, we were not impressed with that joint.

After lunch, Mark and his dad went back to the boat while the rest of us checked out more of the city -- Rockefellar Plaza, NBC studios, Trump Tower, and 5th Avenue. What I couldn't get over was the sheer breadth of wealth and poverty that could exist in tandem. Homeless men napped outside Tiffany and Co.

We made it back to the boat around five, took showers and naps, and were back out again at 9, in search of food. After taxiing back to Greenwich Village, we wandered around a bit until we found a relatively secluded Japanese restaurant. After sushi and sake, we walked around some more, finding a rather dodgy park infested with all sorts of sketchy night-crawlers. I insisted we get out of there as soon as we could. We taxied back to the boat, and our adventures in New York were officially over.

This morning, we set off around 10 a.m., first circling the Statue of Liberty. We're now out on the open waters again, and we won't stop until we make it to Ft. Lauderdale -- 75 hours underway. Tonight, the waves are supposed to reach 4-7 feet, and I'll be on watch with Mark... NOT thrilled about the prospect, but I'll have to do it to make it through. Maybe this will help me get my sea legs... and hell, if I'm puking the whole time, maybe I'll shed some unwanted poundage?

2008-08-19T21:02:00.000-04:00

Well, the charter has been over for a few days, but that doesn't mean all has been fun and games yet... not completely, at least.

Since our guests have left, my days have been filled with mountains of laundry and miles of vacuuming. Yesterday alone, I had to stow the boat which is a pretty intense job in itself, but to do it ALONE is easily a multi-day affair. This isn't the normal stow where I just put vases and lamps on the floor. Yesterday I stuffed pillows in cabinets with wine and liquor bottles and moved ANYTHING that wasn't attached to the floor to one corner of the room, and taped and tied all the cabinets shut. At one point, Shelton and Mark laughed at my wild hair -- when I put it up in a half ponytail and let my curls splay out around my head. I thought it was cute, but they said I looked like a witch. Jerks.

We have lost some crew members for the trip down to Ft. Lauderdale. Donna Marie went back home (LUCKY!), Kaki left to drive the crew car back down to Florida, and Tim went on vacation to Gatlinburg, Tennessee. As a result, we got a new engineer, Phil's best friend Boise. He's British and HILARIOUS! I love him... Mark's dad and Chris's sister are also joining us for the ride down. Chris's sister just got out of culinary school, so she's getting some galley experience on the trip, and Mark's dad is just hanging out.

I said that not EVERYTHING has been fun and games since the guests left, but that doesn't mean we didn't have a LITTLE fun. The other night, Donna Marie and I went out on the town to celebrate the finishing of a charter, and we stumbled upon a blues bar that was REALLY cool! Not only were our fellow crew members there -- Mark, Chris, and Boise -- but they had a Karaoke band! Anyone who knows me KNOWS that I LOVE KARAOKE!!! So, I couldn't WAIT to get myself up on stage. I sang Carrie Underwood's "Before He Cheats", but I couldn't hear myself on the monitors... everyone said I rocked it though... It was SOOOO cool to have a LIVE band to sing with!!! I've always said that I wanted to be a rock star for about fifteen minutes, and now I have... so I can tick that off my "To Do Before I Die" list...

We are underway now for New York. We should approach Chelsea, Manhattan around eight o'clock tonight, and we'll have all day tomorrow in Manhattan. I'm really excited to see the city, but I have NO clue what I want to do... I'll be researching today to see what's around the area, but if I have to take a cab, then SO BE IT!

Last day...

2008-08-18T15:47:00.002-04:00

Well, we've MADE it! I've got a few more minutes of break left before I'm late girl on the last night of charter... It's kinna sad actually. I'll miss the family. Once you spend a month with people, you either love or hate them. I love them.

We had a crew meeting in the bridge this afternoon to discuss our tip. I won't talk about money here, but just suffice to say it was DOUBLE my month's salary. I'm STOKED! I've already decided the bulk of it is going to credit card debt -- pay off one and pay down on another. I know that money can't buy happiness, but a little bit of it can buy security, and honestly, that's what I'm looking for.

SPEAKING of security, I was wondering what I should do once I have no more debts to pay off. I can just hole my money up in a bank somewhere, but I'd rather invest it for the future... I have NO clue where to start with all that... maybe I should get an "Investing for Dummies" book to give me some good information? It's weird to think that I won't have any real expenses as a yachtie -- no rent (except for my stints in crew houses), no utilities, no car payment (once I finish paying mine off).

In addition, I am struggling with whether or not to accept Kaki's offer to remain on the crew full time. She hasn't *officially* offered, but she's mentioned it several times and been "training" me like I'll be around for a while... I would really like to experience more boats, see how things are run on different vessels... get around more crew... Then again, Kaki and Phil have been fantastic -- understanding about my seasickness, patient with my inexperience, and generous with time off... If I stayed on for a season, that would mean that I could leave in April once the boat returns to Ft. Lauderdale from the Caribbean. I would be working EVERY holiday -- no Cumberland at Thanksgiving, no family Christmas... I would be able to get ahead financially, and I can sacrifice one holiday season, although I shall miss my family terribly. I am still mulling over the decision, and I probably won't decide anything until after we make it back to Florida. Kaki has already said that she would give me a couple weeks to sort everything out at home, so I wouldn't be expected back in FL until mid-September. That will probably be the last time I see them until April... weird, huh?

Casinos, pigs feet, sky lounge torture, and Percy

2008-08-16T15:03:00.002-04:00

I have a rather random playlist for you today, but I think you will find it entertaining and enlightening.

1) Casinos... we are in Norwich, Connecticut today -- Home of the Mohegan Sun Casino... Checked it out last night with Tim, Chris, and Mark (I never get to hang out with Donna Marie because we have to alternate duties...). I had never been in a casino before, so I wasn't sure what to expect. Honestly, I wasn't impressed. Maybe it's because I already loathe gambling and think the flashing lights and chirping bells are all smoke and mirrors to hide a dark and sinister agenda. Whatever the case may be, I was sickened by the amount of money thrown down on chance... What disturbed me more than anything was the amount of elderly folks playing the slots... In my inexperienced opinion, if anything in a casino is rigged, it would be slot machines... another thing that really shocked me was the LACK of Native Americans at an Indian casino... hmmmm... I saw more Asians working there than anything. In FACT, even the souvenirs had more Asian themes than Native American... People say that the Indian tribe get the proceeds from the casinos, but I honestly don't believe it... if that's the case, then WHY do Native people as a whole have higher rates of unemployment, suicide, diabetes, heart disease... if the money is going to the people, then why do they have the highest poverty rate of ANY group in the nation? I do apologize for getting on my soap box... As many of you know, Native Americans have always had a soft spot in my heart, and it ticks me off to see their rich and beautiful culture bastardized by Western dogma. But, I digress... on to lighter news.

2) Pigs feet... this is two fold... First... I routinely spend time in the galley -- prepping for meals AND cutting through from one part of the yacht to another. Today, Chris has chosen to adorn his counter top with the most SINISTER and DISGUSTING pigs feet -- roasted and charred... I am PRAYING they are nothing more than macabre decor and NOT an ingredient in a future meal. Of course, he may be trying to tell me something... my feet REAK because I wear flip flops that make my feet sweat... there's nothing to absorb the sweat, so... well, you get the picture... I'm washing my shoes today, so I hope that will work... I'll report back on that later.

3) Sky Lounge Music torture... I don't know WHAT the hell Kaki was thinking when she put together the music mix for these people. Half the songs I've never heard, and the other half I WISH I'd never heard. Today she put some crap on that sounded like bad karaoke -- swooning love ballads with women warbling and wailing through each note. I think I puked in my mouth a couple times. Bring back the Earth, Wind, and Fire!!! The sad thing is, I can't do ANYTHING about it because Kaki is the chief stew and she's the boss... So, my poor ears must suffer through the so-called music.

4) And NOW, for the BEST NEWS OF ALL!!!!! Percy is back home! Got a message from Lisa that things weren't working out with Percy -- he was pooping and peeing all over the place -- so my mom picked him up today. Honestly, I'm thrilled to have him back with my mom, and I know he is, too... I'm so sorry things didn't work out, but I know that everyone will be happier now that all is right with the world... Well, everyone except Clifton. Oh well. Can't please EVERYONE.

Down to one hand...

2008-08-15T00:17:00.002-04:00

So, there are five days left of charter... Crazy to think that I've been at this for three and a half weeks already...

Anyway, I'm in the crew mess alone... everyone has gone to bed but me... I'm in WORK! mode... I've been ironing everything I can get my hands on. Even asked the guys if there was anything they needed me to iron for them. I managed to convince Chris that I would NOT ruin his new expensive clothes by A) putting them in the dryer, and B) pressing them with a steam iron. He was pleasantly surprised when I brought his linen shirt back without burnt stains on it. Silly boys.

I think the storm from yesterday has blown over... I steered a safe distance from Mark this morning just to make sure... This evening I was able to ask him how long we would be underway (3 hours) without a scowl or anything. He really is a nice guy... he was just frustrated yesterday.

OH! I was TOTALLY snubbed at the nail salon today! I showed up for my 2 o'clock appointment at 1:45 thinking it was polite to show up early, right? The receptionist asked me to come back in fifteen minutes. Thinking that was rude and WANTING to tell her that she'd be lucky if I came back at all, I walked across the street to some stores. I arrived ten minutes later and was completely IGNORED! The receptionist left and three employees walked by me without so much as a smile or eye contact... Was I a frikkin GHOST? I waited around until 2:15 and when nobody even asked me what I was doing there, I got up and left... so I have nappy toes and mangy eyebrows, but that snooty salon will NOT have MY money! OH! And to top it all off, I had to listen to these two daddy's girls gossip about EVERYONE they know about... "Oh my god! I heard she was addicted to CRACK!" "But, she's SO nice!" "I know! And I was like, why in the WORLD is she being such a bitch to me! I'm living my dream here!" One thing I've always been taught AND learned about people is that if they gossip TO you, they'll gossip ABOUT you. Keep your mouth SHUT...

Anyway, we are heading to Norwich, Connecticut tomorrow... apparently there are some casinos nearby that the Mr. and Mrs. want to hit... funny, they got rich by hold ON to their money, and now they want to blow it playing slots and black jack? Oh whatever... I've never gambled before, but I think I'd become addicted to it... If I can become addicted to craigslist and myspace... and BLOGGER! then I can DEFINITELY get hooked on gambling. If I HAVE to go to the casinos, I'll bring $20 and once that's gone... I'M GONE. :-)

OH YEAH! Another colony of jellyfish floated by our boat tonight. I leaned over so far to see them that I almost fell into the water WITH them. Wouldn't THAT have been interesting? Anyway, one of them was swimming around -- doing that mushroom dancey thing that looks so cool... and as they passed in front of the light, their veins glowed red, green, and purple.

What else? Nothing that interesting... I pulled some rock hard mashed potatoes out of the crew fridge today... someone left them on the top shelf next to the freezer... so THEY froze. Ummmm... both of our vacuums are broken... I woke up with a sore throat today and post nasal drip and a stomach ache... I've become a hanger thief because I'm always out of them in the laundry room... I was excited to get my FIRST project! Napkin inventory! Ugh, THIS is the life of a stew, my friends...

$h!t has hit the fan...

2008-08-13T21:22:00.003-04:00

Okay, so the proverbial shit hit the fan this afternoon when Phil got home and none of the guys were on board... Because I was the girl on watch, I got the brunt of the guys' frustration... well, everyone but Chris's. It was none of my business what they did with their afternoon--whether they went to a bar to get pissed, or a salon to get pedicures... They are grown men, and if they are supposed to be on duty, then how can it be MY fault if they're caught off guard? BUT, Kaki had my back and assured me that I had done exactly what I should have done (stayed on the boat), and they should not have left me by myself. Wow. For once I've done THE RIGHT thing... It's funny how quickly things can change... both for the good and the bad. I'm sure everyone's frustration and anger will blow over by tomorrow, and all will be well again...

To kinna get away from the heat, I took off on my own tour of Sag Harbor... um... yeah, not much happening. By seven o'clock, half the stores had closed... maybe I was walking in the wrong direction. It's a cute town, though... but not remarkable. It looks like Anytown, USA... tree-lined sidewalks, quirky storefronts, dogs on leashes, kids in strollers... eh.

It's still early yet, and I'm sleepy... maybe I'll humor my body and get to bed at a decent hour tonight. I'm early girl tomorrow, so I need some rest to keep me running until my afternoon break.

All alone...

2008-08-13T15:39:00.002-04:00

Okay, so everyone is off the boat... and I mean EVERYONE... I'm the only chump stuck here... holding down the fort... or would that be anchor? Anyway, Kaki and Phil have taken Mr. and Mrs. to East Hamptons shopping; Mark, Chris, and Tim are getting manis and pedis... (no, they are NOT gay, but maybe Provincetown had more of an effect on them than we thought); Shelton is jet-skiing, and Donna Marie has the afternoon off. The GREAT part about all this is that I get the evening off starting at 6, so... YIPEE!!

Not much to report, really... just had a moment to chat...

PICTURES!!!

2008-08-12T19:45:00.002-04:00

Okie dokie... so I'm doing gangway watch... basically, I'm keeping an eye on the dock to make sure our guests don't return without our knowledge... Boring, but I have to stay here, and I can get on my computer, so I'm game...

Anyway, I thought I would post some pictures... the Provincetown ones that I owe you all and some regarding life on board... So without further ado... My pictures.

Provincetown -- Notice all the rainbow flags?? And I thought Pride Weekend was FLAMING!

As if things couldn't get ANY more crazy, I saw this store front.

Shelton, a.k.a Spiderman, scrubbing the side of the boat... does this look fun? Shelton would GLADLY give up the privilege.

I am eating a BABY OCTOPUS! It's chewy, and a strange texture... I can only eat one at a time, honestly...

Mr. Bigglesworth, the captain's African grey parrot... he's SOOOOO cute! Even though he snips at me all the time. I just talk to him and keep my fingers away.

Went out on the town last night... it was fun, but I had a HELLUVA time getting going this morning. I started out with Mark and Chris hanging around the Nantucket docks, and then I got a text from Kaki telling me that Mr. and Mrs. were going to the Chicken Box and wanted me to join them. I'd been wanting to check the little hole in the wall myself, so we grabbed a cab and headed over. It was a dodgy bar... pool tables on one side and dance floor on the other. Beer flowed as freely as the laughter, and the band... well it was a Bruce Springsteen cover band... and they weren't much better than the Boss himself. Mr. and Mrs. are SUCH fun to hang out with! There was a shuffleboard game at the bar that they kept playing... it was MUCH harder than it looked because the board was sprinkled with silica to keep the discs from sticking... THAT only meant that every disc I threw only sailed off the side of the table... I don't know my own strength... But after about six games, I started getting the hang of it.

So, this evening, we are docked at Sag Harbor, New York... near the Hamptons. The weather is perfect, atmosphere is nice... an American Legion post is at the end of the dock, and a band is playing old tunes... How quaint! I'm itching to get off the boat in this town, but I don't know when we leave, and I've decided that -- after last night -- ten o'clock is my curfew.

Shelton's out here now... going to turn some laundry over and hang in the crew mess... maybe Mr. and Mrs. will be out listening to the band... hehehe.

Sneaky, Sneaky!!

2008-08-11T14:24:00.003-04:00

Hey there... I'm hiding out in my cabin for a few minutes... I'm service girl right now, but Kaki is taking care of the guests. We're in a holding pattern for now. We THOUGHT we'd serve a late lunch, early supper and not have any formal dinner tonight, but Mr. and Mrs. came back having had appetizers at the restaurant... Oh whatever. I'm early off tonight, so I just hope to be done with everything fairly quickly...

This family is SO sweet... Mr. told Kaki yesterday that he wanted all of the crew to visit a certain clothing store on the island and pick out whatever we wanted. Little did we know that the clothes in the store were fashions direct from Europe... the guys mostly got button down shirts with fantastic detailing and silky soft fabric. We girls had a more difficult time because the store was a MENs clothing store, but I walked out with a redish-coral sweater that is OH SO SOFT... I shall thoroughly enjoy wearing this!

We are now down to seven days left on the charter... The whole crew is happy to be done with this trip, although we WILL miss the family. They have been wonderful to work with, and they are already asking about chartering again in January. Word has it, they've been chartering for about five years, and they've never chartered the same boat twice... so THAT, my friends, is a GREAT sign.

Last night was an exhausting night. Don't know WHY it was so tiring, but I'm so grateful that Shelton agreed to keep watch while I laid down for a bit. I think we're all just getting tired. Mark about popped is top yesterday because Nantucket recycles and nobody on the boat knows what to do, Shelton is stoked about his vacation home after the charter, and Kaki and Phil are gearing up for a stint in Europe. Suffice to say, we all need a couple days off... hell, half the time I don't know what DAY it is unless I look at a calendar... and I honestly feel like I've been on this charter for forever...

Kaki has been talking to me about the trip down to Ft. Lauderdale. Apparently, things are WAAAAY different when we are underway like that. First, everyone has watch shifts -- usually three or four hours at a time. Second, if the seas get rough, everyone sleeps in the staterooms! (That's about the ONLY reason why I'd want rough seas...) Also, word has it we are stopping off in New York for maybe a day and night... THAT should be a blast! I've already got some cute "going out" clothes, but I need a pair of shoes... Also there have been rumors that we may stop off in Charleston as well... I LOVE CHUCK-TOWN!!!

What else? Oh, I dunno... I'm SOOOOOO tired today... I was able to sleep a bit later than usual because everyone was out so late last night, but I got up earlier than my scheduled time to help out with cabins... Early girl usually doesn't a break, so I'm hoping that everyone will scarf down their food and hit the bars... I want to GET OFF THE BOAT again!!!

Tomorrow we leave for Sag Harbor... that's in New York / Hamptons area. I'm looking forward to that port, too. Actually, I've had no complaints on ANY of these places... They've all be very nice and charming in their own ways.

Hannah Leigh is officially left for college now... Mommy and Clifton moved her things up to UGA today. Funny how time has flown by. Seems like yesterday she was graduating from high school! Now, she's attending the big, bad university where she'll be a little squirt again... I am PRAYING for her safety and success... honestly, the sheer size of that school terrifies me. But, she's a smart girl, so...

I'm gonna sneak a nap before Kaki misses me... Later... Oh, and I still owe you those pics...

Provincetown, Mass...

2008-08-10T08:40:00.003-04:00

Okay, so we anchored out at Provincetown, Mass. last night... took the tender in to town for a little walk around, and LET ME TELL YOU!!! HAHAHAHA!! It was a pretty crazy place. Rainbow flags hung EVERYWHERE, drag queen strutted around in pleather boots and bouffant wigs. I have pics to post later... Great shopping... found two cute "going out" tops and a beautiful red dress... Word has it we are stopping in New York on the way down to Ft. Lauderdale, and Chris has already said I need to figure out where I want to go so we can do it.

Once we got back to the boat, everything was dark and the anchor lights were on illuminating the water. There was a flock? swarm? pod? of jellyfish just floating by... some a small as the tip of my pinky and some as large as my fist... as they passed in front of the lights, their veins shimmered and illuminated. I felt as though I was staring into another world as I gazed into the water... there was no sound, no movement. Nothing more than the fluid drift of the jellyfish.

We are pulling into Nantucket as I write this. I really like the town, and I'm glad to be back and with a little money... I'm trying to put together a better wardrobe than I have now... I've got jeans, a couple shirts, a dress... now I need some cool shoes and accessories.

I'm a sneaky little bugger...

2008-08-08T11:03:00.002-04:00

hehehehe.... I've sneaked into my cabin to write a few lines this morning before things get hoppin... Kaki is taking care of the guests, Donna Marie is cleaning all TWO cabins, I've washed, restocked, reorganized, folded and ironed about everything on the boat, so I'm taking a breather... even though I'll have a break at one today.

Anyway, as I was setting up breakfast this morning, I was reminded once again about why I love this job. We're in Boston Harbor, and even though it's been dreary and rainy since we arrived, there was something calm and serene about the scene this morning. The seagulls were crying out, the fog rolling in, and the water lapping on the docks. In the distance, I heard the industrial sounds of cars and machinery. Runners pounded the pavement around the docks as business men sipped coffee and read the paper at a nearby shop. Yes, I would have rather been nestled in my little triangle-shaped bed, but I couldn't ignore the tranquility around me. Almost as though all was right with the world. The city is beautiful in the morning -- even a cloudy morning like this one.

If the rain holds off a while, I'm going to take my guitar to the Boston Commons to play... no open case or anything, just a little lunch-hour jam session... Maybe I'll get someone to take a picture of me playing?

Memories of Home

2008-08-07T22:57:00.003-04:00

So I've been thinking a LOT about all that I'm missing out on this weekend, and I can't help but remember a poem I wrote a couple summers ago. Here it is, in all its glory...

I remember...
Laina Breazeale

...misty mornings, chilly and wet, the valley tucked in a quilt of wispy fog.

...the treasure hunts for blue bottles. “It’s just milk of magnesia bottles,” Mommy would sniff, but I didn’t care. I still searched for them, squealing with delight when I found one.

...slamming screen doors and laughter in the house. "You kids git outside! Ya lettin' flies in!"

...spitting contests, trying to propel it through my grimy fingers like Granny and Janie Ruth, but it always just dribbled down my chin.

...sinking deep into the sand, the cold water licking my ankles, beckoning me to plunge.

...swarming gnats and mosquitoes feasting on my arms and legs even though I was lathered in Skin-So-Soft and Army supply insecticide.

…running among the gravestones, a living, breathing irony—freshly sprouted child playing among the gnarled, sunken monuments to the dead.

…shelling green beans striving to pull out those strings because I hated how they felt when I ate them.

...chocolate-chip cookies and cherry Kool-aid in the scratched daisy cup with Granny Bird. With a red mustache, I watched the black-haired German woman in the blue sweater shuffle around the trailer telling stories of the old country.

...picking blackberries. Armored with long sleeves, pants, and hats, military insecticide lining our wrists and ankles, milk jugs tied around our waist—our holsters for the juicy fruit. “If you eat ‘em all, we won’t have any for cobbler.” Granezes reminded.

…the night symphony beating down the door and windows, singing me to sleep.

But I mostly remember...
...the late night conversations with blaring lights and sweltering heat, blanketed in sweat, weighed down with exhaustion, and enveloped with absolute peace.

working hard for the money...

2008-08-07T18:32:00.003-04:00

Cocktail party tonight... despite the threat of scattered thunder showers ALLL evening. We've stocked Bud Lite, Corona, Sam Adams, and various wines and liquors like the end of the world is coming. CRAZY! I'm just worried about getting people hammered and then sending them home in the rain. EEK!

Tomorrow I should have another long break -- I'm the late girl again -- and I'm tempted to take my guitar to the park across the street and play for a while. Weather permitting, of course. I'm missing my jam sessions and open mike nights. We leave for Provincetown on Saturday morning, so I don't have much more time in the city. I should take advantage of it, eh?

I'm supposed to be the "early girl" tonight, but I have no clue what that means... I'll probably get off at 11:00 and still have to get up at 7, even though Mr. and Mrs. never rise before 9:30... oh well.

ANyway, I hope to have more to report this evening...

the finer things in life...

2008-08-06T22:56:00.003-04:00

We're back in Boston... arrived here early yesterday afternoon after a rather choppy ride from Portsmouth. The night before the trip, I shared a bottle of wine with Chris as we exchanged pictures and stories from home... I really love this crew! But the ride into town was difficult... stomach stayed in tact, but my head swam circles around me... NO, I WASN'T HUNG OVER!! Just a little dehydrated, maybe.

Anyway, Chris is our chef, and he takes food very seriously. Whenever he gets some time away from the boat, he tries to eat at the hottest restaurants. Last night, I was invited to join him on one such occasion, and let me TELL YOU!!!! It was quite and experience!!!!

Chris is a sushi connoisseur, so after having read New York Times' best restaurants outside NYC article, he was determined to try out O Ya, named the best sushi bar in the nation. He made reservations for two and informed me that I was invited to attend. Of COURSE, I accepted, despite the fact that sushi has always made me feel a bit queasy - all in my head, I'm sure. So, at 8 pm, Kaki let's me go so I can get all dolled up for the big night out. I put on the ONLY dress I thought to bring with me, did my best to make myself half-way presentable in a record time, and traipsed across the street to the bar where Chris had gone with Mark and Tim. My hair was flat, and my sundress didn't exactly fit in with a chilly, rainy Bostonian evening. BUT... it's the best I can do, so I plastered on that dazzling smile and walked tall.

We decided to take a cab to the restaurant because we weren't sure how long of a walk it would be. Turns out, O Ya is just a few blocks away from the marina... When we arrived, the street seemed virtually deserted. We saw a sign for the restaurant, but that was the only indication that anything was nearby. The windows seemed dark, and the front door was solid wood... it was an eerie place, almost like out of a movie or something.

Once we got inside, the place was buzzing with activity. The restaurant is small -- only about 30-40 patrons at a time -- and guest are seated either at a bar to watch all the sushi being made, or against the side wall. We were seated against the wall, given a menu, and greeted by a wonderful server. The menu made my mouth water... I didn't know what half the entrees were, but they sounded scrumptious. I never could have chosen just one. Fortunately, Chris had a plan of his own. He had the chef cook for us. We ended up getting fifteen courses of a variety of entrees -- sushi, steak, mushrooms, eel, duck liver... and every bite I took made me want more. Some of the items sound disgusting, and honestly, I can't BELIEVE I'm saying this, but it was incredible!!! In addition to the entrees, we sampled four different kinds of sake... I walked out of there feeling fine... not a hint of a buzz. During dinner, Chris, who saved the menu, took notes of each entree. He numbered each one and noted their appearance and other seasonings not mentioned on the menu.

At the end of dinner, we ordered dessert -- coconut gelato and boston cream pie -- that ended up being MUCH less sweet than most desserts, but more satisfying and refreshing. Chris, knowing what it is like to work in a hot kitchen, bought the chefs drinks. They came out to thank him, and as we chatted with them, they brought us back to the kitchen for a tour. It was SOOOO COOL!! We saw how they make the ribs and how they package all their seasonings. Everything was so clean and well organized. The kitchen was small, but efficient and very well kept.

I won't even say how much the evening cost, but I will say that it was the MOST expensive dinner I've ever partaken in, and it is definitely an expense I will not often indulge. But, everything was great about the night -- the food, the sake, the company. And it made me realize something about this industry. My exposure to the "finer things" in life are going to spoil me pretty quickly. In fact today, the guests spent the entire afternoon off the boat, so we all had the day off. I had five hours to myself this afternoon, so I took off to run my errands -- I headed to the post office and the salon for a pedicure. THEN, I went into another salon and spent WAAAAY too much money on hair products for my mass of crazy curls. After a shower, I felt like a new woman... and my hair smells like roses and oranges... is niiiiice. I wanted to get some new clothes, but I ran out of time... oh well. Maybe on my next day off I can hit some cute boutiques. Oh, did I mention that I've lost a bit of weight on this charter? You'll still recognize me, but my jeans are looser and my shirts are roomier. Even Kaki has noticed! This is pretty good news for me since it seems like there's always something to munch on around here. Just tonight, Mr. and Mrs. brought back cannolis from the North End (the Italian district) and gave Mark a bottle of champagne to congratulate him on earning his Master Captain's license. Not to mention the croissants and homemade muffins every morning... AND all the wine that moves through this crew mess... EEEK! If I wasn't climbing 100 flights of stairs every day, I'd be as big as a house!

Spoke with my mom for a while tonight... It was so good to hear her voice... I guess these past few months have been the longest I've ever been without seeing her... How long has it been? Right at two months? I miss her (and the rest of my family) SO much, but I have to remind myself that I'll be back with them in a few weeks. This weekend is Decoration, and for the first time in several years, everyone will be able to make it. Everyone except me, of course, and even as I write this, it breaks my heart to know that I'll be missing them. I SO cherish the times I spend with my family -- reminiscing and laughing together; watching with amazement at how much my cousins have grown each time I see them; wishing the short moments together would never end... I've always lived from year to year looking forward to Decoration -- battling the gnats and mosquitos, gorging myself on a seemingly endless table of food, sliding down the waterfall until there is more mud in my underwear than on the rocks, listening to the deafening sounds of the crickets and frogs at night... Those are the moments when I feel most at home and comfort. It will, I fear, be a long time before I am able to see those mountains again, but until then, I carry the memories in my heart and long for the day when I will return again to my roots, no matter how simple.

Maine...

2008-08-04T22:38:00.003-04:00

Okay, so we spent a whole 24 hours in Maine, but the Mrs. urged Mr. to go back to Boston. As a result, our stay in Maine was short... The sky rained for 18 of the 24 hours, but the fog and crisp air created an eerie romantic atmosphere.

Went out with the guys last night. Met up with Phil, Chris, Mark, and Tim at a bar and then we quite literally went bar hopping... hitting three bars in 3 hours. By one a.m. we headed back. Downtown Portland is actually really cute with cobblestone streets stretching and twisting around old brick buildings with charming storefronts and hanging wooden signs. At three o'clock this afternoon, we said farewell to the Pine Tree State and hello again to Portsmouth, New Hampshire. We leave for Boston at 8 am tomorrow morning... first thing I do when I get to Boston, I'm finding a post office and then a nail salon to get a pedicure... these dogs have definitely earned a little pampering. Maybe I'll splurge and get the royal pedicure -- with leg massage and that little foot skin shaver that always makes me feel like my feet are more disgusting than I realized they were.

We are scheduled to stay in Boston for a "few days", so I should have some time to explore further than Faneuil Hall and perhaps Newbury Street and Trinity Church. Kaki has extended our daily breaks to four hours to give us some more time to "play" during the day. Four hours on Wednesday should be enough time for me to get my business taken care of and then some exploring...

I just read through this blog and realized that I didn't really have much excitement to report... I guess I'm just getting into the routine of things. I'm glad we are working our way into a sort of rhythm with running this charter.... It definitely has cut down on the stress I experienced a few weeks ago. I've even noticed that Kaki has stepped WAAAAY back and allowed Donna Marie and I to do much of the service. She's been struggling with her fibromyalgia, so if she isn't doped up on pain meds, she's lounging around with heating pads and creams. Of course, the guests are absolute sweethearts, so that's made this trip even more of a treat. Yes, it is long hours and constant movement, but the rewards -- beyond the tip -- are making this job worth it. Despite how messy the guys are, they are darling. I see each of them as big brothers I never had. I don't mind cleaning their dishes or even cleaning the NASTY crew mess every evening. I swear, sometimes I feel like Wendy from Peter Pan -- being a mother to the lost boys... hehehe...

So, my dad encouraged me to start writing a novel or book of sorts... I've started tossing some ideas around, but nothing concrete. Of course, it would be a highly dramatized version of my own experiences upon the high seas... I don't think the general public could handle the raw and uncut version. That would NEVER be a best seller...

Anyway, we are half-way through the charter, even though it seems like we should be wrapping up the trip, we haven't even reached the home stretch yet. Still, these people are a dream to take care of -- half the time they just snack around and they drink like fish... keep em drunk, keep em happy... hehehe... (actually, it's more like "muahahahahaha", but...)

Going to bed soon... sleep is a premium around here...

I'm truly AMAZED...

2008-08-03T00:50:00.002-04:00

I was checking out my profile views and it seems I've had over 1000 hits on my blog!! THAT'S INSANE!!! I'm not going to beg you to leave me a message, but I will tell you that it makes my day...

Anyway, today was a fairly easy day. Everyone left the boat by 9:00 a.m. and we anchored outside of Ogunquit, Maine. The ladies had a hat party to attend, and it was an all day affair. No problem for us!! I got a four hour break from the deal, so I was happy. The break was wonderful, too, considering the pitching and rolling of the boat. Apparently we got stuck in quite a swell that rendered the 160' megayacht helpless in the water... the Sky Lounge see-sawed back and forth preventing us from walking in a straight line or getting much work at all. My stomach stayed in tact, but my head jiggled like a bowl of Jello.

My mom and dad both sent me the sweetest emails today. Honestly, they brought a tear to my eye! It isn't until those moments that I really miss home. But, only a few weeks left and I'll be back for a short time. Mommy sent me words of encouragement that she is so good at giving (when she isn't lecturing me about my finances!), and Daddy encouraged me to keep writing. Well, here I am! It may be rough and uncensored, but the best writing seldom comes in neat little packages. I've been taking more pictures... I keep my camera with me in the Sky Lounge so I can run outside and snap a picture when photo ops come available. Just those little pictures are poems and stories in themselves. They conjure such a vast array of emotions that I'm feeling right now -- independence, adventure, loneliness, serenity, stress! I've especially become fascinated with the lighthouses that seem to dot the coastline. They seem like such pillars of strength and warmth -- even in the daytime. Even though I've never been inside one, they seem to comfort me.

Oh, there I go rambling again... It seems sleep is taking over again, but every time I close my eyes, the boat rocks back and forth making me feel like I've been drinking too much. The only thing I've had today is water, I PROMISE!

I hope that maybe tomorrow will be another light day. We'll be moving to another marina -- closer to the Portland action -- and the Mr. and Mrs. have offered to take the girls at least out to Barnacle Billy's for fresh Maine lobster since the boys singlehandedly ate the entire six pounds of lobster the Mr. sent back for the crew. I swear... those boys are a mess. Apparently, Billy's is where the Bush family likes to eat... which, by the way, we saw their boat entourage pass by us on our way to Ogunquit.

Okay, 8:30 comes waaaaay too early for my liking. Gotta jet. Send me some love, even if you just stumbled on my page... let me know what you think!

And yet another victory!

2008-08-02T00:42:00.002-04:00

Docked in Portsmith, New Hampshire tonight... NO SEASICKNESS!!!!!!! I wore my shock bracelet for about 2 hours before I ripped it off... Was able to work through the entire trip...

This evening I was invited to drinks with the captain... had a GREAT time and was able to see the crew in a different light... Captain Phil, Kaki, Mark, and Chris were all there. Kaki came across as VERY different from how she is during the day... I could see myself becoming friends with her, and my respect for her grew a bit tonight. Mark and Chris were just as they have always been on the boat... goofy and sweet. Phil said something to me that I will treasure ALWAYS. He put his arm around me and told me that he was VERY proud of how I was doing on this charter. He knew that the past few days had been hard and I've been learning a LOT, but I've shown myself to be a great stewardess and he's very happy with how things are going. That means the WORLD to me right now as I'm struggling with whether or not I'm doing a good job. Kaki noticed tonight that sometimes I sigh... not necessarily out of frustration or exasperation (in my opinion), but just from being overwhelmed... Kaki told me as well that I'm doing a great job and she's happy that I'm here. It really helps to hear something like that.

Anyway, again tonight I'm exhausted. I have to get up in just a few hours and I'm dreading it. I'm the late girl tomorrow night, and I don't know what to expect... the ladies are going to a hat party tomorrow, so its a toss-up whether they will be out late or not... plus, we should be moving tomorrow evening, so...??? At any rate, I'm beginning to be attached to this crew... as difficult as the first few days have been, I am starting to gel with their dynamics... Chris is moody -- especially the morning after a drinking spree... Mark is just a hard nut to crack, but put a drink in his hand and he's Chatty Cathy... Kaki is just plain stressed... and Phil is a true British gentleman -- think Mr. Darcy but much sweeter and less mysterious.

Okay, so I sign off tonight tired, happy, yet nervous about what tomorrow may bring. Oh, and I still need to talk about the whales...

ME SO SLEEPY!

2008-08-01T01:24:00.002-04:00

Yes, i was the late girl AGAIN... and I'm SO exhausted... there is so much I want to write, but I simply don't have the energy to type much more than this tonight... We are off to Maine tomorrow... I'm going to wear the wristband, keep cool, and focus on my job... maybe I won't get sea sick again!

Anyway, I'll post more tomorrow... maybe while we're underway!

yeah, I know it's late, but I wanted to post...

2008-07-30T02:07:00.002-04:00

Okay, so night four of being the "late girl" and it's really starting to get OOOOOLLLLD!!! Of course, I don't have to get up early which is nice...

The guests were up until about 1:15 this evening -- they had invited some friends over for some cocktails, and the party lasted until the wee hours of the morning. I didn't mind serving them because everyone was in a great mood and already hammered -- singing karaoke to Elton John and relaxing in the hot tub. It is actually kind of fun to watch everyone get drunk... hehehe...

Oh yeah, and I have to tell you -- these people are JUST like the rest of the world... in fact, one of the guests told me tonight that her favorite food is PIZZA!!! This woman has two kids and drinks liquor... she's been around the world and tried all sorts of foods and her FAVORITE of EVERYTHING is PIZZA?! OOOOOoohhh-kaaaaaaay... Case in point - having money doesn't make you any less normal or more special than anyone else...

OH! GOOD NEWS!! I made it sea-sick free from the voyage yesterday! WAHOO!! About half-way through, I took the bracelet off because it was stinging the shit out of me... I was fine after that... and I didn't need any Bonine. In FACT, I think the meds make me feel WORSE than anything. That's not to say that I've grown a beautiful set of sea legs just YET, but they are definitely sprouting...

In other news, I had the COOLEST encounter with whales yesterday during the voyage! They ended up getting about 15-20 feet from the boat... I almost CRIED it was such a moving experience. I got some pictures, but they aren't as great as seeing them first hand... there is something about hearing the blowing and seeing the tail slapping the water that is just magical... Besides, my camera is slow and unreliable, so some of the pics turned out bad. BUT, I was able to crop, so I hope I've been able to capture just a TASTE of what it looked like.

There is so much more I'd like to say right now... but I'm just too exhausted to do anything else... I got up at 7 this morning and have only had a one and a half hour break all day... didn't even eat dinner and I'm WIPED OUT!

SOOOO.... I'll have to save my comments on the whales for another day... Good night.

So far... so good...

2008-07-28T12:57:00.002-04:00

Okay, so we've been underway for almost four hours, and I haven't puked yet... My left hand is twitching from this fancy-smancy motion sickness bracelet, and I have to keep myself from getting hot, but other than that, it's been smooth sailing. I honestly think this bracelet is more a psychological thing. The tingling through my hand is keeping my mind off the swirling in my stomach... Hey! I'm all for whatever works!!

I only have about 15 minutes left of my break, and then its the TRUE test of my abilities. Kaki said everyone is up on the fly bridge (the very top deck), and its breezy and cool up there. GOOD! AND, they're drinking like fish. Surprise, surprise!!! They've been going through Absolut like it was water -- at LEAST a bottle a day.

Remember a couple days ago I said I'd be having school nightmares right about now? Yeah, I had one last night... it was weird. I showed up as a student, but I didn't have my shoes, and there was no way to get to my classes without walking over squishy mud or sharp rocks. It was weird...

Anyway, I'm hoping that maybe I can work well enough that I can get off early tonight? I'd love to play my guitar and relax a little around everyone else. Every time I'm in the crew mess, everyone is either asleep or working! Oh well...

Gotta run...